


Puppet AU

by CrossingTheFourthWall



Series: The Actions of Puppets [1]
Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: (Chapter 14), (in chapters 8 and 10), (it hurts to write that. really.), (mostly off-screen but there is one time where it is clearly and blatantly implied), Gen, Mind Control, Multiple Dimensions, Rape, Religious Fanaticism, Torture, an AU of my own creation, cannibalism (ish), crossing over into a couple other fandoms as of chapter 15, danny phantom (in ch 19), enslavement, lots of death, naked poledancing, phineas and ferb (in ch 15), the characters from those fandoms only appear within those chapters however, this is the most terrifying thing I've ever written
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-10
Updated: 2018-04-28
Packaged: 2018-12-13 12:49:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 20
Words: 66,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11760237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrossingTheFourthWall/pseuds/CrossingTheFourthWall
Summary: What if, when the Zodiac failed, Cipher didn't allow the Pines to split and force him to chase after Dipper and Mabel? What if he was more...twisted, in how he decided to punish the Pines and bring them down to their lowest?This is that AU.Beware of reading this -- there is rape, there are orders given that certain persons would never consent to, there is graphic death, there is Stan eating people (on Cipher's orders), and there is a broken and destroyed family.And a defeated, broken Ford's perspective through the whole thing.Will they be given a way out? Who knows?





	1. What Makes a Soul?

**Author's Note:**

> This whole thing was beta-read by my dear friend, howtotrainyournana. Thanks for all the help, my friend!

This was not how things were supposed to go.

The Zodiac should have done something, but he and Stanley _had_ to get into a fight and now look at how things had ended up.

“Bill, leave them alone!” Ford struggled against the bonds that kept his arms strapped to his sides, desperately trying to free himself in an attempt to keep Bill from doing who-knew-what to Dipper and Mabel.

_“WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I’M GOING TO LISTEN TO YOU?”_ Bill turned his eye to Ford as he telekinetically raised up Dipper and Mabel into the air with one hand. _“SHEESH, YOU PINES THINK THAT YOU’RE SO HIGH AND MIGHTY – IT’S A WONDER THAT YOU HAVEN’T BEEN BROUGHT DOWN A PEG YET!”_

The triangle motioned almost lazily with his other hand, and the glowing red energy coils that were keeping Ford and Stan suspended in the air abruptly transformed into glowing blue chains that attached themselves to the old men’s necks and arms.

Ford tried to hold back a wince as the cuffs chafed against the electrical burns that were already there.

“Grunkle Ford/Stan!”

The niblings’ cries sent chills down Ford’s spine as he looked over at them in alarm and terror as Bill held them in the air in front of him, scrutinizing the younger twins like they were a couple of useless trinkets from the Mystery Shack.

“Kids!” Ford strained against the chains, gritting his teeth against the pain.

“Leave ‘em alone ya stupid triangle!” Stan roared as he shook his own chains to Ford’s left.

Bill glanced over at the two old men for a moment, then snorted. _“DO YOU REALLY THINK THAT I’M GOING TO LISTEN TO YOU, EITHER? YOU’VE LOST, FEZ! ANY CHANCE YOU HAD OF BEATING ME WENT UP IN SMOKE WHEN YOU AND SIXER DECIDED THAT A FIGHT WAS MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE ZODIAC!”_

Stan and Ford winced at that, their struggling faltering at the reminder.

_“AND, SINCE YOU FOUR HAVE BEEN MORE OF A THORN IN MY SIDE THAN ANYONE ELSE ON THE WHEEL, I’VE GOT SOMETHING SPECIAL IN MIND FOR YOU.”_

Bill snapped his fingers, and Mabel and Dipper were quickly chained up to Ford’s right, legs dangling freely.

Ford felt a feeling of dread settle in his gut. “Special” in Bill’s dictionary meant “painful beyond belief” for everyone except for the dream demon. The color started to drain from his face, but he quickly shook his head and steeled himself. He had to be strong. He had faced Bill’s brand of torture before; this wasn’t something that was new to him.

Whatever it was that Bill was going to throw at them, he was determined to survive it and – hopefully – devise a way to get Dipper and Mabel out of harm’s way as soon as possible.

_“NOW, WHICH ONE OF YOU TO START WITH….”_ Bill hovered in front of the four Pines.

“Wh-what are you going to do to us?” Dipper asked. He sounded like he was trying to be brave, but the squeak in his voice gave away his fear.

_“JOINING YOUR FRIENDS AS DECORATIONS WOULD BE FAR TOO EASY.”_

Ford’s eyes moved up to where the other members of the Zodiac now hung, their screams of terror immortalized for the rest of time. He quickly averted his eyes and went back to glaring at Bill.

_“AND I DO HAVE PLANS FOR THE FOUR OF YOU WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT.”_ Bill tapped at the bricks below his eye thoughtfully. _“SAY, FORDSY. WHAT WOULD YOU SAY ARE THE INGREDIENTS TO MAKE A SOUL?”_

Ford blinked – he hadn’t been expecting the question. He frowned. “Something tells me you already know the answer.”

_“WELL, YEAH, DUH! BUT YOU CAN EXPLAIN IT FOR YOUR FAMILY – I’M DONE GIVING YOU FREEBIES.”_

Ford’s frown turned into a scowl, and he sighed irritably. “Intelligence, Emotion, and Willpower. Those are the three things that make up a soul, according to what I’ve learned in some dimensions.”

_“DING DING DING! GIVE THE SMARTY-PANTS A SCREAMING HEAD FOR A PRIZE!”_

The head that had appeared in the Mindscape before – as a joke for Ford’s achievements decades in the past – materialized in front of him now. He winced back as the thing started shrieking and watched as it fell to the floor of the Fearamid.

“EEEEEEEE---“

_Splat._

Bill stared down at the red spot on the floor for a moment before shrugging and snapping his fingers, cleaning up the mess in an instant. “ _AW, WELL. IT WASN’T THE BEST PRIZE THAT I CAN GIVE. THAT SORT OF THING’S NOT GONNA MATTER TO YOU SOON ANYWAY.”_

The dreading feeling in Ford’s gut doubled.

_“TELL ME, FORDSY. WHAT DO YOU THINK HAPPENS WHEN SOMEONE LOSES A PART OF THEIR SOUL?”_ Bill focused his attention on Ford and moved up so close that Ford could see every individual vein in the dream demon’s enormous eye.

“What are you—“ Ford cut himself off as his eyes widened sharply. “No – no, you can’t! It’s impossible!”

_“NOTHING’S IMPOSSIBLE IF YOU’VE GOT ENOUGH_ WILLPOWER _TO FOLLOW THROUGH!”_

With that, Bill threw two brightly glowing hands forward and thrust them into Ford’s chest.

Ford had been though a lot of torture in his life. Electrocution during Weirdmageddon was only the tip of the iceberg compared to what he had to run from every other moment on the other side of the portal. He had scars crisscrossing nearly every inch of his body, and he was never planning on revealing them.

The pain that Bill was inflicting now, though, by rummaging through his body but not _physically_ harming him was an entirely different kind of pain.

The rummaging stopped for a moment, and Bill’s expression became wicked. _“AHA! FOUND IT!”_ He started pulling back and away from Ford. _“COME OUT, COME OUT!_ ”

Ford suddenly found himself having a hard time keeping his mouth shut as a pain that he’d never felt before erupted from his chest. He threw his head back as a loud scream erupted from his throat, blood roaring in his ears as Bill continued pulling at the whatever-it-was inside him. He suddenly found it hard to breathe; his lungs felt constricted and _Bill was pulling out something that was bright blue and throbbing with the pulse of his heartbeat—_

Ford’s vision suddenly went gray, and the scream died in his throat as he went limp, head bent back to look at the ceiling, jaw slightly agape.

_“Grunkle Ford!”_

_“STANFORD!”_

The panicked voices only barely managed to breach the sound of white noise that was filling his ears. Ford couldn’t move or so much as twitch in order to respond – his body felt unusually heavy, and there was pain pulsing from his chest outwards to the tips of his fingers and toes.

Something bright blue flickered at the edge of his vision, and he felt the cuffs on his wrists tightened and something yanked his arms forward. The same thing happened with his ankles a moment later, and then his neck.

Color returned to Ford’s vision then, and he took in air with a gasp of breath that caused his aching chest to heave as he lifted up his head. He found himself staring at Bill again, the triangle holding one hand over the human’s head as Ford hovered in the air in front of him.

Bill cackled. _“IT WORKED!”_

“What worked, ya lousy two-dimensional freak?!” Stan roared. “What did you do to my brother?!”

Bill sneered at Ford’s twin. _“OH, YOU’LL FIND OUT SOON ENOUGH. YOU’RE GOING TO GET THE EXACT SAME TREATMENT.”_ He turned his attention back to Ford, smiling with his eye. _“SEE, IT’S PRETTY FUNNY – I GOT THE IDEA FROM A GUY WHO THOUGHT THAT IT’D BE A GOOD IDEA TO TAKE THE SOUL OUT OF EVERYBODY AND TURN HIMSELF INTO A GOD THAT COULD HAVE A MINDLESS, HEARTLESS ARMY TO WORSHIP HIM FOR ETERNITY. STUPID IDEA, RIGHT – NOT THE WORSHIPPING PART, THE SOUL PART. I MEAN, WHAT USE IS AN ARMY IF YOU CAN’T USE THEIR OWN KNOWLEDGE TO FORWARD YOUR PLANS?”_

Ford felt that dread rise up in his stomach again as the blood drained from his face. That blue glow he’d seen before – had that been—

_“DON’T THINK THAT I’M DONE WITH YOU YET, FORDSY.”_ Bill rubbed his hands together. _“YOU’VE RUN INTO A LOT OF DIFFERENT ALIEN RACES – LIST THEM. AND I WANT DESCRIPTIONS, TOO!”_

In any other situation, Ford would have _wisely_ kept his mouth shut – he didn’t want to give Bill any ideas to use on him as a new torture method that could possibly kill him and any chance of defeating Bill.

Now?

Words spilled out of him in a constant stream, causing Ford’s eyes to become wider and wider and make him look more owlish and terrified by the second.

Meanwhile, Bill was hovering circles around him, an almost manic spark in his eye as he looked Ford up and down appraisingly.

Ford couldn’t see Stan or the kids, but he was sure that they were looking at him in absolute horror. He was quick to come to his own conclusions about his present predicament as well, but that only made his fear for what Bill had planned for the others hit him full-force.

And he _couldn’t do anything_ because he was already listing his research to Bill who had done _something_ to him and—

_“STOP.”_

The words died in Ford’s throat, causing him to blink in surprise and come out of his thoughts.

_“GO BACK A BIT. YOU SAID SOMETHING ABOUT A SIX-TAILED FOX?”_

Ford swallowed nervously and nodded slowly.

Bill got in close enough that Ford could see his own face reflected in the dream demon’s pupil. _“TELL ME MORE ABOUT THAT ONE.”_

Once again, the information spilled out of Ford without hesitation, unnerving him to no end.

“The species is called Vulpix by the locals in that dimension. They are incredibly similar to kitsunes, except they are born with six tails instead of one and are known more for their control over fire than anything else. The one I got to know personally during my stay there was an unusual case who also had some control over ice and electricity. We ended up helping each other out some, considering that a warp in space caused me to temporarily transform into a Vulpix myself and they knew little to nothing of humans.”

Bill burst out laughing. _“I THOUGHT THAT SOUNDED FAMILIAR! NO WONDER YOU REACTED LIKE YOU DID, SIXER! THAT DIMENSION’S THE EXACT ONE THAT I GOT MY IDEA FROM! IN HONOR OF THAT….”_

Bill snapped his fingers, and Ford felt instant _pain_ everywhere at once.

He doubled over, clutching first at his chest, then at his head as he felt something start to move in his skull, forcing its way up through the metal plate and out the top of his head. At the same time, the base of his spine started to throb and push outward, and his mouth started pulsing with pain as his teeth shifted as some grew in size.

Ford squeezed his eyes shut and attempted to grit his teeth; this kind of pain was something he was a lot more familiar with, but the _origins_ of the pain was something else entirely.

Whether he was familiar with the pain or not, however, he still ended up screaming when the top of his head and the base of his spine felt like they exploded, temporarily causing a loss of hearing and feeling from the waist down as blood trickled down the sides of his head where his ears used to be and stained the back of his pants—

Wait. _Where his ears_ used _to be?_

Bill started cackling again as Ford slowly uncurled himself, wincing at the fading pain in his head and spine as he looked up at the triangle. _“PERFECT! GO AHEAD AND HAVE A LOOK AT YOURSELF, SIXER!”_

Ford instantly reached for the sides of his head, trying to find his ears but only being met with smooth skin and his own blood. How were his glasses staying up?

“Grunkle Ford, they’re on top of your head!” Mabel called.

Ford froze. “On top?” His voice made him sound half-choked as he realized at the same time that his canine teeth had become slightly larger – almost like fangs, in fact. He slowly reached up, feeling through his blood-soaked hair to the two throbbing points of pain on top of his head and—

His fingers came into contact with two _furry_ , triangular-shaped ears that twitched under his touch.

Bill started snickering as Ford’s eyes widened, but the man ignored the triangle in favor of turning in order to see what exactly had happened at the base of his spine, catching sight of manacles on his wrists and ankles with Bill’s mark stamped around them.

Ford wasn’t really paying attention to what was on his wrist, ankles, and probably around his neck, however.

There was a red-gold _fox tail_ with a gray tip that had torn a hole in his pants and was hanging limply in the air behind him.

_“OF COURSE, YOU CAN’T HAVE SIX TAILS LIKE A VULPIX YET BECAUSE YOU HAVEN’T LIVED THAT LONG, BUT THAT’LL CHANGE SOON ENOUGH.”_

Ford turned sharply to look back at Bill. “Why did—“

_“SHHH.”_ Bill held a finger to Ford’s lips, effectively shushing him. _“YOUR NEW MASTER IS THINKING.”_

The words died abruptly in Ford’s throat, leaving him wide-eyed in shock and terror at Bill’s choice of words as his blood ran cold. _Master?_

Bill eyed Ford for a moment before making a motion with one hand, causing the man to be slowly lowered to the floor of the room in a kneeling position. _“STAY PUT. I’M GOING TO DO YOUR BROTHER NEXT.”_

Horror crossed Ford’s face in an instant.

“You touch me and you’re going to regret it!” Stan barked as Bill drew near him. “Like I’m gonna let you turn me into some half-animal—“

_“WHO SAID THAT I WAS GOING TO MAKE YOU EXACTLY LIKE YOUR BROTHER, FEZ?”_ Bill raised his hands, and they started to glow ominously right before he thrust them into Stan’s chest.

The pained scream that followed as Bill ripped out a pulsing blue cloud of energy made Ford wince and shut his eyes, looking away from the sight.

He was pretty certain he knew what it was that Bill was tearing out of them.

“Grunkle Stan, no!” Mabel yelled.

Bill cackled. _“I KNOW JUST WHAT I’M GOING TO TURN_ YOU _INTO, FEZ! FORDSY, YOU BETTER BE WATCHING THIS!”_

Ford shuddered, but he opened his eyes and looked up as Bill telekinetically pulled Stan away from where he’d been chained up a moment before. Now, Stan looked startled and dazed -- like he’d been surprised with a hit over the head and he hadn’t quite registered that he was supposed to get angry yet.

Bill snapped his fingers again, and Stan’s body _tore itself apart._

“Grunkle Stan!” Dipper and Mabel shrieked.

Ford took in a breath to yell his brother’s name as Stan attempted to curl in on himself, but it came out as a choking gasp instead as he felt a pang of _something_ in his chest. It was like…

…like something was stopping him from doing what he wanted.

Ford paused to consider that thought in alarm. _Wanted._ The word was starting to feel distant – like he could barely grasp it, but it was slipping out of his fingers faster than a handful of sand from Glass Shard Beach.

Just another piece in a puzzle that only confirmed his growing dread.

Stan’s skin and clothes were covered in blood and what looked like a dark, almost furry substance now – no, it actually looked more like feathers. His ever-present fez fell off and was caught by Bill, only to burst into blue flames and be turned to ash in an instant.

_“DEFINITLEY NOT GOING TO BE NEEDING THAT ANYMORE!”_ Bill laughed as though he’d made his own joke, then returned his attention to Stan. _“LOOKIN’ GOOD. LET’S SEE YOU SWITCH BACK.”_

The black, feathery/furry figure let out a groan, but he slowly uncurled himself as the feathers shimmered and flattened, turning back into a torn suit and what exposed skin Stan had.

Ford saw his brother open his eyes and flinched a little when he saw them flicker lime green for a moment before turning back to their normal color. He caught sight of something on Stan’s neck a moment later – a string of yellow triangles with a singular eye on each of them.

“Grunkle Stan!” Mabel yelled. “Are you okay?!”

Stan’s face scrunched up at the question, and he winced. Ford realized instantly that Stan had hit the same wall he had a moment ago.

_“OH DON’T WORRY ABOUT FEZ, SHOOTING STAR.”_ Bill gave a wicked smile with his eye as he motioned to have Stan land to Ford’s right on the floor. _“NOW, YOU BE A GOOD CHANGELING AND STAY. AND NO TALKING – EITHER OF YOU. I’VE HAD MORE THAN ENOUGH OF THAT FOR ONE DAY.”_

_Changeling._ Ford had heard about them, but he’d never actually met one in person. Then again, if he had he hadn’t known – they were beings who could take the place of humans and mimic the missing person almost perfectly, and never show their true forms.

They were also said to devour those they were replacing, or were simply exchanged for a baby in the crib, never knowing or revealing their true nature to their adopted parents until it was too late.

Stan scowled as he landed in a kneeling position on the floor, but he kept his mouth shut. Ford saw him try to look at him out of the corner of his eye, but Ford wasn’t able to move his gaze away from where Stan had been hovering in the air a moment ago.

Considering what Bill had done to them and what he was going to do to Dipper and Mabel, there was little else that he was able to do.

A cold feeling settled in Ford’s chest at the thought as Bill moved, blocking his view of Dipper and Mabel.

Moments later, twin screams of pain and terror filled the Fearamid.

Ford felt his new ears flatten themselves against the top of his head, muffling the noise some, but not blocking it out completely. He heard the choking gasp from Stan – no doubt trying to yell at the kids only to run into the mental roadblock again.

Bill moved back, pulling Mabel and Dipper with him and revealing the look of horror Dipper had on his face and the terrified expression Mabel had on hers.

Bill didn’t even bother to wait to make a quip; he snapped his fingers in a bored manner, and Mabel and Dipper screamed again in a dissonant unison as they curled in on themselves.

Ford’s breathing hitched when he saw the pair of translucent pink, fairy-like wings growing out of Mabel’s back, tearing through her sweater and causing the yarn to unravel as it was stained with her blood, her hair gaining a sparking sheen that made it look like there was starlight trapped in each strand. Thin, sparkling strands of _something_ magical circled around her wrists, neck, and ankles, not quite touching her skin but clearly not moving from their positions.

Dipper shuddered as his own transformation took hold, antlers that looked like tree branches shredding through his hat and staining it a dark red. Vines covered in thorns wrapped themselves around his neck, wrists, and ankles, and criss-crossed over his torso, not digging in but clearly irremovable.

Ford felt the hollow ache in his chest as his mind and instincts told him to look away, leap to his feet, do _something_ in order to put a stop to what Cipher was doing to his family. However, without the willpower to back it up, the thoughts were just that – thoughts.

There was nothing that could be done. As much as Ford hated to admit it…Cipher had won.

The hollow ache faded as Cipher brought Dipper and Mabel down and placed them to either side of Ford and Stan in kneeling positions. The triangle hovered over the four of them, an amused and triumphant look in his eye. He snapped his fingers, clearing the blood out of their clothes and hair but leaving the rips and tears behind.

_“FOUR NEW PUPPETS – AND I DON’T EVEN NEED TO POSSESS A SINGLE ONE OF YOU TO GET YOU TO DO WHAT I WANT! THIS HAS TO BE THE BEST IDEA THAT I’VE HAD SINCE KILLING TIME BABY!”_ Cipher cackled. Then he paused. _“OH, YEAH. I STILL NEED SOMETHING FROM YOU, FORDSY.”_

Ford knew what Cipher was going to ask. He closed his eyes as he let out a sigh, his new ears drooping.

_“THAT EQUATION TO POP THE BUBBLE KEEPING US IN THIS STUPID HICK TOWN. I NEED IT TO TAKE THE PARTY WORLDWIDE. SO GIVE ME THE NUMBERS, FORDSY.”_ Cipher made a “gimme” motion with one hand. _“I KNOW YOU’VE GOT THEM IN THAT HEAD OF YOURS.”_

Ford sighed again and nodded, then recited the equation without hesitation.

Had the situation been any different, he would have withheld the information for as long as he could, no matter how much Cipher would have tortured him. However, Cipher had effectively changed him – changed them – at their very core.

Without their willpower, there was no point in fighting back.


	2. Testing (part 1)

After Cipher had gotten the equation, he told the Pines to stay put and get some shut-eye so that they’d be well-rested for “when the party REALLY got started.”

Which meant that Ford was left alone with his own thoughts as the pain from his transformation faded – not that he was doing much thinking now.

Cipher had torn their willpower right out of their souls and had made them into literal puppets to do whatever it was that he desired. There really wasn’t much point in doing anything beyond wait for Cipher to give them new orders.

_“Man, humans really are resilient little freaks, aren’t they?”_

_“Did you see the wreck that Bill made of the robot? Serves them right for trying to ruin our party!”_

Ford’s ears twitched at the voices – almost as though they had a mind of their own. The voices were familiar – members of Bill’s “Henchmaniacs,” most likely. Hadn’t Dipper and Mabel said something before about a distraction that kept them out of the Fearamid…?

_“Hey, look – there’s more humans in here!”_

Then the voices changed to ones that Ford was unfamiliar with.

_“Dipper! Mabel!”_

_“Oh goodness gracious, what happened to them?!”_

_“GUYS! TALK TO US! WHAT ARE YOU DOING JUST SITTING AROUND?!”_

Ford’s eyes didn’t even twitch open, although his ears flicked back at the loud, deep voice of…was that a girl? It might have been – one of Mabel’s friends, perhaps. Hadn’t Dipper mentioned something about them before?

_“Hey, get the eyebats and shut this group up, huh? We’ve got to get Bill’s throne rebuilt before he gets back here.”_

_“What do we do about them, Ronnie?”_

_“Eh. Bill probably wants them for_ something _, and if they aren’t moving, I say we don’t bother with them. If they make a bolt for it, we can send Teeth after them.”_

_“I like that plan!”_

_“YOU WILL NOT BE EATING MY PUPPETS. I WORKED HARD ON THOSE!”_

Ford felt a chill run down his spine as Cipher’s voice echoed in the room; his tail – which had long been sitting limp – stiffened for a moment before relaxing as his ears searched for where Cipher’s voice was coming from.

_“O-oh! There you are, Bill! Where’ve you been?”_

_“I wasn’t gonna eat ‘em….”_

_“Did you just say ‘puppets’?”_

_“YES, I SAID PUPPETS, KRYPTOS. TRY TO KEEP UP.”_

There came some uneasy whispers at Cipher’s words – most likely the humans taking in what had just been said.

Then there came the flapping of wings, and the voices of the citizens of Gravity Falls were completely cut off mid-screams of terror. Ford could hear the sound of stone being set in place, and his heart sank.

_“GOOD JOB ROUNDING UP MY THRONE BY THE WAY!”_ Cipher added approvingly. _“CAN’T HAVE A THRONE ROOM WITHOUT THE THRONE!”_

_“That’s what I said!”_

_“So can we get this party started up again, Boss?”_

_“YEAH! BUT FIRST – WAKEY WAKEY PUPPETS!”_

Ford cracked his eyes open, blinking a couple times to readjust them to the light. He raised his head and noticed that a good number of the Henchmaniacs were staring at them expectantly – the green one with the 8-ball eyes was missing, though.

But where was Cipher?

_“UP AND AT ‘EM!”_

Black fingers wrapped themselves around Ford’s middle and lifted him up with a sudden jolt that Ford’s body wasn’t prepared for. His breathing hitched in surprise, but then it settled back into something more even, his limbs and tail hanging limply as Cipher held Ford up in front of his eye.

_“YOU KNOW, I’VE HEARD A LOT ABOUT WHAT YOU HUMANS CALL ‘ENTERTAINMENT’,”_ Cipher commented with a light lilt to his voice. _“SINCE I CAN GET YOU TO DO WHATEVER I WANT NOW, I GUESS THAT MEANS WE’RE GOING TO BE EXPERIMENTING A LOT! THAT SHOULD BE FUN!”_

A part of Ford’s mind didn’t like the sound of that.

_“BUT I’M GONNA HAVE TO HOLD OFF ON THAT, SO DON’T GET TOO EXCITED.”_ Cipher laughed. _“WE’VE GOTTA POP THAT STUPID BUBBLE AROUND THE TOWN FIRST AND GET THIS PARTY SPREAD ACROSS THE UNIVERSE!”_

“We knew you’d figure a way to do it, boss!” yelled one of the Henchmaniacs – the one with the keyhole in his head. “Are you gonna do it now?”

_“THAT’S THE IDEA!”_

Two more arms sprouted from Bill’s sides as he reached down and picked up Stan, Dipper, and Mabel – all of whom let out gasping noises – no doubt trying to struggle only to fail miserably.

_“COURSE, I COULDN’T DO IT WITHOUT FORDSY HERE GIVING UP THE EQUATION FIRST.”_ Bill shook Ford a little, getting the others to look over at him. _“WOULD YOU BELIEVE THAT IT TOOK TEARING OUT THIS GUY’S WILLPOWER IN ORDER TO GET HIM TO TELL? TALK ABOUT STUBBORNESS!”_

Bill laughed as he started moving out of the Fearamid, the Henchmaniacs following after him with their own brands of laughter – some sounding a little more nervous than delighted.

“Y’know, if they’re yours now, maybe you should put ‘em in something a little different?” The only clear woman-monster of the group sidled up next to Bill, eyeing Stanley with an interested expression. “I mean, they don’t look like they’re ready to party.”

_“GOOD POINT, PYRONICA! I’LL LET YOU PLAY DRESS-UP WITH THEM LATER WHEN I’M DONE EXPERIMENTING WITH HUMAN ENTERTAINMENT.”_

“Oo! Sounds fun!”

The grin Pyronica gained at Bill’s words made Ford feel more than a little nervous. Yes, he knew that he couldn’t do anything without Cipher directing him now, but that didn’t mean that he was going to _like_ it. It was just that he couldn’t do anything to fight back.

It didn’t take them too long to get outside under the red-twilight light that Weirdmageddon had brought with it, the X-shaped rift glowing an ominous yellow in the no-longer-blue sky high above them. If a person focused on the edge of the forest surrounding Gravity Falls, they would no doubt have noticed that the apocalyptic atmosphere ended rather abruptly at a certain point, and the rest of the world looked as normal as the town had been before.

Unfortunately, that was about to change.

Cipher moved to the edge of town and stopped right in front of the bubble. He hovered over the destroyed road for a moment, then put Ford and Stan down in front of the magical barrier.

_“STAY.”_ Cipher rose up in the air, keeping Dipper and Mabel in his other hands as he inspected the barrier, pushing against it with his now-free hands. _“…AHA! HERE WE GO! EVERY BARRIER’S GOT TO HAVE IT’S ONE—“_

The triangle brought a hand back and clenched it into a fist then covered it in glowing fiery blue energy before throwing it forward. _“—WEAK SPOT!”_

Ford’s eyes widened as the barrier gave under Cipher’s fist, then let his hand through, blue fire burning a perfect circle into the barrier that slowly started to expand outwards, destroying the invisible wall between Gravity Falls and the rest of the world.

_He must have matched the frequency of the barrier by changing the frequency of his own aura somehow._

The Henchmaniacs started cackling and cheering loudly as the barrier’s destabilization started to increase its speed. Already, the weirdness was starting to spill out of the town, bleeding into the sky and sending the creatures that were living in the forest scattering left and right as they tried to get away from Gravity Falls and the chaos that Cipher had brought with him. Ford caught sight of three unicorns with gnomes on their backs galloping off into the trees and towards the more civilized parts of the world – which would no doubt fall under Cipher’s chaos sooner than later.

Cipher let out a loud cackle. _“PERFECT! NOW WE CAN TAKE WEIRDMAGEDDON GLOBAL! HAVE AT IT, FELLAS!”_

The Henchmaniacs whooped and scattered, running out of town as the weirdness _really_ started to take hold of the land out beyond Gravity Fall’s borders. Some of the trees started to uproot themselves and run around, cackling madly in high-pitched, near-squealing voices as they rammed into each other – despite the fact that they had apparently gained _mouths,_ they had no _eyes_ to see with. A flock of eye-bats flew over Ford’s head and split off into groups then, going off into the wider world outside of Gravity Falls.

Cipher cackled again and picked up Ford and Stan. _“I’M DEFINITELY NOT GOING TO BE MISSING OUT ON ANY OF THIS! THERE’S JUST SO MUCH THAT I CAN DO, AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME NOW! HEY – THIS WOULD BE A PRETTY GOOD TIME TO TEST YOU FOUR OUT!”_ Cipher held the four Pines up and looked over each one in turn. _“NEW FORMS MEANS NEW POWERS, AFTER ALL, AND I’M DEFINITELY LOOKING FORWARD TO SEEING WHAT YOU CAN DO!”_

If Ford was completely himself, he would have spent time by himself in a controlled setting to test his newfound abilities – after getting as far away from Cipher as possible, of course. Defeating him wasn’t something that he was capable of at that present moment.

_“SO LET’S FIND THE NEAREST AREA POPULATED WITH MEATSACKS!”_

It didn’t take Cipher too long to do just that. Considering that the dream demon was now physical and had control over space, time, and matter, it was a simple matter for him to teleport to the nearest big city.

Cipher dropped the four of them on an already-cracking highway, the sky red and ominous far above their heads. Ford caught sight of a sign near them which read “Welcome to Portland” in large, simple lettering. There were trees rising up on either side of the road, and in the distance Ford could see skyscrapers and other buildings, dark against the red sky.

_“SO, BEFORE I LET YOU PUPPETS LOOSE TO EXPERIMENT AND TERRORIZE THE HUMANS, THERE’S SOMETHING I WANT TO MAKE VERY CLEAR.”_ Cipher hovered in front of the Pines, looking down at them with his hands propped against his sides – much like when humans put their hands on their hips. _“YOU’RE MINE NOW, AND THAT MEANS YOU HAVE TO DO WHATEVER IT IS THAT I WANT YOU TO DO. I CAN TELL FORDSY’S ALREADY FIGURED THAT OUT.”_ The triangle fixed Ford with his gaze for a moment before looking back at the rest of them. _“YOU’RE GOING TO TREAT ME WITH RESPECT, AND YOU’RE GOING TO DO IT RIGHT. WHICH MEANS THAT YOU’RE GONNA BE CALLING ME ‘MASTER’. GOT IT?”_

Had Ford been whole, his throat would have tightened in alarm at that, and he would have outright protested at the idea. As it was now, however….

Ford gave a soft sigh and nodded. “Yes, Master.”

Stan, Dipper, and Mabel all made soft gagging noises before they offered the exact same responses, no doubt attempting to resist Ci—the Master’s order but failing without the willpower required to back it up.

_“THAT’S RIGHT. GOOD PUPPETS.”_ The Master reached down to each of them and ruffled their hair – or baseball cap, in Dipper’s case. _“NOW, GO IN THERE AND CAUSE AS MUCH CHAOS AS YOU CAN WHILE YOU’RE FIGURING OUT WHAT YOU CAN DO! PILLAGE, KILL – IT’S ALL ON THE TABLE! I’LL BE HANGING AROUND TO WATCH YOU, TOO, SO MAKE SURE YOU SHOW OFF! AND REMEMBER – **I’LL BE WATCHING YOU!”**_

The Master flickered red for a moment as his voice darkened, but then he went back to his glaring shine, smiled, and vanished from sight.

As soon as he was gone, Ford felt like whatever force that had been keeping his limbs in place loosened suddenly. He rolled his shoulders and cricked his neck, loosening up a little. He was going to need to be loose if he was going to be able to find out his new limits, if being a kitsune added anything to his already human form.

Stan grumbled a string of curses under his breath. “I don’t like this.”

“You don’t think that I do, either?” Ford replied wearily. “Unfortunately, we don’t have a choice.”

Dipper opened and closed his mouth a couple times. “Something got pulled out of us….” He shuddered, gripping his chest as the tree branch antlers on his head rattled against each other.

Ford nodded sadly, his ears drooping a little. He turned and looked at the city that was ahead of them, mentally steeled himself, then started forward. Dipper and Mabel caught up to him instantly, moving to his left and right, while Stan trailed behind them with what seemed to be a soon-to-be-permanent sour glare.

“S-so, what do you think we can do now?” Dipper reached up to the branch-like antlers on his head. “Am I some kind of…fairy or something?”

“I think that’s certainly a possibility for the both of you.” Ford nodded to Dipper and Mabel. “What you can do, however, is something that I’m not sure of.” He glanced back at Stan. “Stanley, on the other hand, is a changeling.”

Dipper sucked in a breath sharply. “A changeling? A-are you sure?”

“Quite certain.”

“An’ what exactly does _that_ mean, Poindexter?” Stan asked. “I know it’s somethin’ from those books ya liked ta read when we were kids.”

“Changelings are beings that are capable of replacing people – usually, they’re said to switch babies in the crib for changelings, but more experienced ones replacing adults isn’t unheard of. I’m not exactly sure how that would be done, however.”

Ford was pretty sure that how ever it was changelings replaced people, Stan was about to find out.

Stan grunted at Ford’s words, but he didn’t say anything else.

“If I’m some kind of nature…fairy, then….” Dipper trailed off, his eyebrows furrowing together. “I’ll probably be the strongest in a forest or something. Which means…suburbs.”

Dipper was going to start experimenting in the suburbs of Portland, where they were most likely close to forests and parks – nature.

Mabel tugged on her hair a little, eyeing the starlit sparkles that twinkled and winked at her in the strands. “I think…maybe I should go with Dipper? I mean, I’m a fairy too.”

“So long as we spread chaos as the Master wants, I doubt he’ll care where we start.”

Dipper and Mabel flinched at Ford’s words, at how the word “Master” came out of his mouth so easily. Ford’s tail fluffed a bit under his trench coat before the fur settled back down again; he wasn’t exactly happy with it, either, but he couldn’t change his situation.

He doubted that any one of them could.

“He didn’t say when, either,” Stan spoke up. “When we should start, I mean. We can wait as long as we wa—“

“Want? Is that what you were about to say?” Ford stopped walking and turned sharply to look back at his brother. Dipper and Mabel stopped a short distance ahead of them and looked back. “That’s too far out of reach for us now.”

“Too far out of reach?” Stan snorted. “That’s ridiculous. Just because we hafta follow his orders doesn’t mean that we can’t want anything.”

“…you haven’t noticed, then.”

Stan frowned. “Noticed what?”

Ford’s eyes narrowed. “That hollow ache in your chest?”

Stan’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “H-how did you—“

“That’s not heart trouble, if that’s what you’re thinking,” Ford snapped. “After what the Master did, I doubt that any of us will have to deal with that issue again.”

“What are you getting at, Ford?”

Ford saw what appeared to be a confused frown on his brother’s face, but he saw the look in his brother’s eyes, as well. There was a false gleam there – a false anger as Stan attempted to hide what he really felt.

What he already knew.

Ford’s eyes narrowed again, and he turned sharply and started towards the city again. “We have our orders. It would not be _wise_ to keep the Master waiting.”

Considering how experienced the Master was with tormenting Ford, he had no doubt that the dream demon would find ways to make the others go near-insane as well.

Dipper and Mabel fell into step on either side of Ford again, looking up at him with concern.

“Do you think we’re going to be okay?” Dipper asked, his voice quiet and worried.

Ford’s ears pressed back. “I don’t know, Dipper. To be completely honest, I doubt that we ever will be.”

He knew that Dipper was referring to how they were before.

Dipper’s shoulders slumped. Mabel stared up at him with a wide-eyed expression that revealed her fear.

Behind them, Stan muttered something again, but Ford didn’t bother to look back at him or try to hear what he’d said. His brother was smart in his own way; he’d come to his own conclusions about their situation.

A black blur moved past them suddenly, causing Ford to stiffen defensively in surprise as a sudden gust of wind hit them. He caught sight of a pair of bright, glowing green eyes looking back at him for a moment, and then the black blur was gone.

Ford looked back at where Stan had been, and found that his brother was gone.

“W-was that—“

“Stanley.” Ford nodded at Dipper’s question. “We’d better move to catch up.”

With that, Ford took off at a dead sprint after his twin.

One of the things that he remembered from his travels across dimensions was one particular world where the animals all seemed to have mutated to gain control over the elements. He hadn’t put much thought into studying them – trying to survive attacks from whatever henchmen Bill had in that dimension was harrowing enough without the added stress of on-field research – but he remembered that the “Pokémon” had measurements of strength similar to what a player of Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons would have on their character’s profile. Physical attack and defense, special attack and defense – which was basically magic – and speed. Accuracy and evasiveness were other measurable things, but they only applied to the inherent abilities that each of the creatures had, rather than their capability to grow in a particular status.

And Stan running off presented a chance for Ford to test if his inherent speed had at all been improved as a result of his transformation.

Ford settled into a running rhythm, feet pounding against the cracked highway as Stan became nothing more than a speck of black in the distance. _How did he manage to get so fast? Is it because of his changeling nature?_

Still, it didn’t take Ford too long to realize that he had clearly changed as well – despite the fact that he was old and not as energetic as he had been, his legs weren’t giving out and his muscles weren’t burning with need for more oxygen. Even his breathing remained the same despite the fact that each step was more like his foot slamming down on the asphalt-covered concrete beneath him.

Still, Stan disappeared into the distance, and Ford knew that there wasn’t going to be all that much of a point in attempting to catch up.

“Grunkle Ford, wait up!”

Ford slowed to a stop, looking down in order to watch his footing before looking back at Dipper and Mabel. He blinked in surprise as the two caught up to him.

“I see that you’ve managed to figure out flying, Mabel,” Ford noted, watching his two niblings land with an impressed expression.

Mabel dropped her brother before she landed, stumbling a little before she managed to regain her balance thanks to her fluttering wings. “It feels really weird – like I’m not supposed to have wings and I’m used to having them at the same time.” She looked back at her wings, flapping them a couple times experimentally.

Dipper looked up at Ford. “Were you trying to catch up with Grunkle Stan?”

“Yes; I was testing how my running speed might have improved, as well.” Ford looked around and noticed that the highway was going over what looked like a small downtown area; cars were scattered below the bridge, left abandoned by their owners. “Dipper, I believe this is as close to a suburban area as we are going to get.”

Dipper looked down at the streets below them and nodded. “Yeah, I was thinking that, too.” He looked over at Ford. “D-do you think that it’d be okay if you stuck with us? I-I mean, Grunkle Stan ran off and—“

“The Master didn’t say anything about us needing to split up; I doubt that it’s going to be too much of an issue if I stayed with you.”

Again, Ford’s words made Dipper and Mabel shudder, but they said nothing in protest.

“We’d better get down there, then.” Dipper jumped up on the edge of the bridge. “Do you think you can meet us down at the bottom, Grunkle Ford?”

Ford looked around for a moment, then caught sight of an exit ramp leading down to the street below the bridge. He nodded, then took off again, watching out of the corner of his eye as Dipper and Mabel jumped off the edge of the bridge and glided down to the street below, leaving trails of stardust in their wake.


	3. Testing (part 2)

The streets were quiet and deserted – at least, from what they could see. It was pretty clear to Ford that the stores on the street they had arrived on had all been ransacked for various supplies – windows had been smashed, doors torn open, and many of the cars that were scattered around the area were lying there only because they had been wrecked in some way.

“Everybody must be in a panic,” Dipper commented, looking around. “Do you think there could be monsters around here already?”

“More than likely.” Ford’s ears flicked back a little at the thought. “Remember, figuring out our abilities is a priority. We can worry about other things later.”

Dipper and Mabel nodded in response.

“But…where do we start?” Dipper looked down at his hands, frowning. “ _How_ do we start?”

“Hm.” Ford frowned, considering their predicament, and once again drew on what he knew from his travels across dimensions and interacting with the denizens of each world he’d landed in. “It’s more than likely that you will have to draw on your own energy to activate whatever abilities you might have. As for how you could tap into it, I’m afraid I’m not entirely sure as to how it could be done.”

“So…we have magic now?” Mabel’s eyes were wide.

“That does seem to be the case, yes.” Ford tapped his chin thoughtfully, eyeing the scattered cars and broken-in shops. “Perhaps simply thinking of calling up the power will be enough….”

As though Ford had just said the magic words, his hands suddenly caught on fire, causing him to jerk back with a yelp of surprise and fling his arms out. A wave of fire flew from his hands--

_Fwoosh – BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!_

\--and collided with four cars, sending up large explosions down the street in the process.

**_BOOM._ **

Ford brought an arm up instinctively to shield his face as the gas station near the cars suddenly went up in flames.

“Whoa!” Dipper jumped back, eyes wide with awe and terror. “Grunkle Ford, how did you—“

Another voice suddenly called out, cutting Dipper off. “What was that?! Something set off an explosion somewhere over there!”

The trio froze upon hearing the unfamiliar voice, Ford’s ears swiveling to find where it was coming from.

“Who do you think set it off?” a second voice came over the sound of the roaring flames. “Do you think those monsters from the woods came back again?”

“If they did then I’m going to make sure they get the lesson this time! There’s no way that I’m going to let them get any deeper into the city or so help me—“

A small group of three men and two women came around the corner at the end of the street and stopped short at the sight of Dipper, Mabel, and Ford.

Ford’s tail lashed against his coat as his ears flicked back; these people were armed with rifles and clearly prepared for what Weirdmageddon was only starting to throw at them. Considering what it was that the Master had ordered them to do while in town, they would more than likely be getting the business ends of those weapons soon.

A figure suddenly forced her way through the crowd then – a young woman with short, curly brown hair and a serious look in her eye that gave way to surprise. “Dipper? Mabel?”

“M-Melody!” Mabel yelped.

Ford blinked in surprise before looking at his niblings. “You know her?”

Dipper nodded. “Y-yeah. She’s Soos’…girlfriend….” His voice trailed off as a look of horror crossed his face, which was only mimicked by Mabel a moment later.

Soos’ girlfriend – a voice that Ford might have heard on occasion when Soos was in the gift shop of the Mystery Shack and he was in one of the other rooms of the house. He knew that she lived out of town, but…he hadn’t expected her to be _here_ of all places.

“What happened to you guys?” Melody moved to the front of the group of men and women, frowning worriedly. “What’s with the antlers and the wings? And who’s this guy with you? Is he your great-uncle Stan?”

Dipper and Mabel exchanged worried looks as Ford’s ears flicked back, startling some of the members of the group at the movement.

This wasn’t something that Ford had been expecting to happen. Running into humans, yes, that was something that he had been expecting – the Master had “kill” as an option for them. But someone who they might have known? Someone how had been _in Gravity Falls before Weirdmageddon?_

Dipper spoke up again. “M-melody, a lot’s happened since you left Gravity Falls. We’re—“

_“SHE WAS IN GRAVITY FALLS, WAS SHE? WELL WELL WELL! I THOUGHT THERE WAS AN OPEN SPOT IN MY THRONE FOR A REASON!”_

Ford stiffened as the Master came down from somewhere above them – he really _had_ been watching them.

Melody and the others stepped back in alarm when the giant triangle came down between his puppets and them.

“What in hell are you supposed to be?!” One of the men in the group brandished his rifle at the Master. “Some kid’s geometry project come to life?”

_“NOPE! NAME’S BILL CIPHER, BUT YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR NEW LORD AND MASTER – MY PUPPETS ALREADY DO!”_

Ford caught sight of the wide-eyed look Melody sent them, but he said nothing. Neither did Dipper or Mabel, who bowed their heads unhappily when Melody looked over in their direction.

Ford’s tail twitched under his coat at the stares they were getting from the others. He felt like a bug under a microscope, what with the glares he was getting.

“P-puppets?” Melody repeated, alarmed. “Dipper, Mabel what is he—“

 _“AH AH AH! THEY’RE NOT GONNA ANSWER YOU.”_ The Master wagged a finger, matching his knowing tone.

Ford felt his throat constrict at the Master’s words.

_“AND BESIDES, MY THRONE ISN’T ENTIRELY COMPLETE, AND YOU’D FIT PERFECTLY AS THE FINAL PIECE!”_

The Master snapped his fingers, and an eyebat flew over them and locked onto Melody as she tried to run, only to be turned to stone mid-step, an expression of terror on her face as she looked back and up at the Master.

Ford watched the eyebat fly off with its cargo in tow for only a moment before turning his attention back to the Master.

 _“WELL, NOW THAT THAT’S BEEN TAKEN CARE OF…”_ The Master turned to look back at the puppets who were present. _“FORDSY.”_

Ford stiffened into a position of attention as the Master focused on him.

 _“NICE WORK WITH THE FIRE. NOW LET’S SEE HOW GOOD YOU ARE AT HAND-TO-HAND.”_ The Master motioned to the group of humans that remained. _“KILL THEM.”_

Ford’s instant reaction to this was to launch himself at the group of four, a snarl forming on his face as more animalistic instincts kicked in. He barely noticed his fingernails lengthening into claws mere seconds before he sank them into the chest of the man he had been aiming for first.

If he’d glanced back, he would have seen Dipper and Mabel staring at him with expressions of horror as his victim collapsed underneath him, trying to push him off and failing as Ford’s fingers-turned-claws only sank in deeper, piercing the muscles between the man’s ribs and slashing through arteries.

The feel of the trembling muscle at his fingertips would have made a less experienced man tremble in disgust, but Ford was a veteran of unconventional survival methods. He’d killed organic beings before – animals, bounty hunters, it didn’t matter – and while he usually relied on long-range weapons, there were a few times where he had to get up close and personal.

Ford found the man’s heart mere seconds after he’d pierced his chest, and he squeezed tightly, embedding his now blood-soaked fingers into the still beating flesh. The man below him convulsed, gasping for breath as his lungs were punctured in the process, causing blood to seep in.

Ford pulled his fingers out, not even bothering to flick the blood off as he lunged for his next target – the only other woman who had been in the group besides Melody. His fingers curled around her neck and crushed her windpipe, choking her to death as the man with the puncture wounds in his chest finally died of suffocation from his own blood pooling into his lungs.

“Get back, you monster!”

Ford looked up and stiffened when he saw a rifle barrel pointed at his face.

“I don’t know who the hell you are and I don’t care, but if you’re working for that thing you’re probably better off—“

_Schoooo!_

A stream of starlight suddenly slammed into the man’s rifle with enough force to yank the weapon out of his hands with a yelp of shock. Before he could even move to defend himself, Ford was on him, digging his claws into his neck and slicing it open with little resistance. Blood spurted up and onto his sweater and trench coat, flecking his arms and chest with dark stains.

Ford let the man go, not even bothering to watch him crumple to the ground and his life bleed out onto the asphalt as he turned to look at the last member of the group that Melody had been a part of. He didn’t even freeze when he saw that the last man standing was only a teenager on the cusp of adulthood; Ford just took off after him when the kid bolted, grabbed his head, and twisted.

The sound of a neck snapping blended with the crackling of the flames that were spreading from the gas station to the buildings near it.

Ford dropped the corpse unceremoniously, the boy’s neck at an odd angle as he turned to look bat up at the Master again. Blood dripped from his fingernails, already starting to dry into a crust.

_“NIIIICE, FORDSY! YOU’RE LEARNING FAST! KINDA WISH YOU’D LET THEM SUFFER A LITTLE MORE, THOUGH. MAKE SURE TO DO THAT WITH THE NEXT HUMANS YOU GO AFTER.”_

Ford gave a curt nod in response.

 _“AND SHOOTING STAR! NICE TO SEE YOU’RE FIGURING OUT YOUR MAGIC THERE!”_ The Master looked down at Mabel with an expression of approval. _“KEEP IT UP! I WANT TO SEE WHAT ELSE YOU CAN DO TO BUILDINGS AND PEOPLE!”_

Mabel shuddered, but she nodded.

_“AND PINE TREE, YOU’D BETTER STEP UP YOUR GAME. I WANT TO SEE WHAT YOU’RE MADE OF TOO, YOU KNOW!”_

Dipper nodded, looking uneasy.

_“KEEP IT UP! I WANT TO SEE MORE WHAT YOU CAN DO! KILL, PILLAGE, SPREAD CHAOS!”_

The Master cackled, his eye shifting to give the impression that he was smiling, and then he vanished.

Ford clenched his fists, digging his fingernails into his palms and leaving bloody fingerprints on his skin. He could see the wide-eyed, pale looks that Dipper and Mabel were giving him, and the guilt of showing them his more savage side hit him solidly in the face.

“G-grunkle Ford?” Dipper asked hesitantly. “A-are you….” There was a definite shaky tone in his voice. “A-are we…”

Ford nodded slowly, not trusting his own voice.

Dipper and Mabel paled even further, Mabel’s wings pulling back and shivering at the implications of Ford’s answer.

“I-I don’t _w-wa_ —“ Mabel shivered, not able to complete the word.

Dipper nodded.

“I’m afraid that we don’t have a choice in the matter.” Ford turned and looked at the four bodies lying in the street behind him – his handiwork. “I’m sorry.”

Dipper and Mabel exchanged concerned looks.

“Grunkle Ford—“

Ford shook his head, stopping Mabel’s comment short. “We should split up – we’ll be able to cover more ground that way.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Dipper asked worriedly. His voice cracked at the end of the question. “What if we—“

“I know you two can handle yourselves.” Ford gave his niblings a smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes. The smile disappeared a moment later, becoming replaced by a grim expression. Then he turned and ran off down the street, leaving Dipper and Mabel behind.

Ford wasn’t lying when he said that he thought the kids would be able to take care of themselves. They’d spent who knew how long out in Weirdmageddon on their own – they should be fine on their own.

That, and they had their own abilities that they had yet to figure out, and it was more than likely that Dipper and Mabel would be able to find them without Ford attempting to assist them.

The streets passed by Ford in a blur as he went deeper into the city, heading towards the skyscrapers; there was a pretty good chance that there were still people there who had been working. If he was going to cause chaos like the Master had ordered him to, then that would be the best place to do it.

On a whim, he tried to tap into his fire abilities again as he ran, and his hands became coated in flames, burning away the blood that had started to dry on his fingers. He threw them out to either side as he reached an intersection, seeing more cars scattered on the road. There were a few people, as well, but Ford wasn’t about to make note of their appearances.

**_BOOM._ **

He didn’t even bother looking back to see how big the explosion was, and the screams of fear, terror, and pain that reached his ears didn’t make him so much as flinch. Ford was used to hearing such things focused in his direction thanks to his travels across the dimensions – it was easy to block them out now.

A group of five men and three women appeared in his path, armed with guns of various kinds.

“What do you think you’re doing?!” a young man yelled. “Old man, what’s gotten into you?!”

Ford gritted his teeth, feeling his fangs scrape against his still-normal teeth as his fingers became claws again. At least the kids weren’t going to be watching him this time.

“He must’ve caught something when everything went nuts!” a second man called. “We should put the old guy out of his misery before he mutates any more than he already has.”

Ford snorted at the idea as he came closer to them and quickly picked out a target from among their ranks – the first man who had called out to him. If only they knew the true nature of his transformation.

Either way, they’d still attempt to kill him, but he doubted that they’d be able to deal a finishing blow – not with the Master watching from a distance.

He lunged at his target, hands outstretched and aiming for the man’s throat. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw another man raising his rifle.

_Bang!_

Pain exploded in Ford’s left shoulder, causing him to stumble to a halt and grip at the place where the pain radiated from, pressing down on the staining fabric right at his shoulder joint. A hiss escaped through his clenched teeth as his tail lashed.

“Come to your senses! Please!” The man lowered his rifle, looking at Ford with an expression of concern and alarm. “W-we could find a cure or something! There’s gotta be a way to turn you back to normal!”

The pleading in the man’s voice made Ford feel sick. He growled and started moving forward again, removing his hand from his shoulder and letting his left arm hang limply – he doubted that he was going to be able to use it with a bullet lodged there.

“Connor, that soft heart of yours isn’t going to do us any good,” the first man in the group snapped. “This guy is too far gone.”

“I don’t think so, Riley. Look at his eyes – he’s not crazy! There’s still a hope that he can listen to reason!”

Ford’s eyes narrowed. That word, “hope.” He understood what it meant, but he could sense that mental barrier in his mind that kept him from _actually_ hoping.

He snarled again and, ignoring the throbbing pain in his shoulder, he lunged for the man who seemed to be the leader of the group and dug his claws into his face.

“Gah!” The man stumbled back as Ford darted out of the way of the shots from the rifles that were aimed in his direction. “My eyes! I can’t see!”

One of the women in the group gained an odd look on her face as Ford ducked behind a car for cover from the gunfire. Then he stood up and lashed out with his fire again, sending a wave of flames at the large group, causing yells of surprise and shock to come from the group as they scattered in order to avoid the flames.

“Watch where you’re aiming, Poindexter!”

Ford blinked in surprise, his ears swiveling in order to find the source of the gruff voice. “Stanley?”

One of the women in the group got up from where she’d been pushed to the ground, her entire body turning black for a moment as her figure shifted, becoming something more—

Ford’s eyes widened as the transformation completed itself, and Stan adjusted his suit before shooting Ford an annoyed look.

“Seriously, Ford, don’t throw that stuff around willy-nilly,” Stan huffed. “You researched this stuff, didn’t you find a way to control it or something?”

“Wh-what the hell?” one of the men in the group gasped in alarm. “What happened to—“

“Yer about to find out.”

Stan’s face disappeared as his form shifted again, becoming the completely black, furry and feathery form that the Master had transformed him into. Yellow triangles glowed brightly on his wrists, ankles, and around his neck as he lunged for the man who had been speaking a moment ago, _four_ green eyes opening on his face and focusing on Stan’s target.

Ford winced back in alarm as Stan opened his mouth wide, revealing what could probably pass as a set of shark’s teeth. Drool dripped down onto the man below him as the soon-to-be victim squirmed in an attempt to get away, only to fail miserably.

Ford couldn’t help but watch in morbid fascination as Stan ate the man alive, starting with his head and working his way down to the rest of him, leaving nothing more than a large puddle of blood on the ground when he was done.

The other members of the group stared at Stan in alarm as he shifted back; the remaining two women looked like they wanted to hurl, while the four men looked disgusted.

“What?” Stan wiped the blood off his face with the back of his hand. “A man’s gotta eat, ya know.”

One of the women hurled right then and there.

“You…you’re not—“ Connor paled considerably. “What—“

The other two men in the group grabbed Connor and Riley. “Come on, let’s get out of here before that thing eats someone else!”

The group scattered in different directions as Ford stepped out from behind the car and made his way over to his brother, who was licking his lips like there might have been some residue left behind.

“I knew that changelings could replace people, but I wasn’t aware that they did it like _that.”_ Ford looked at his brother with an expression of surprise and disgust.

Stan shrugged. “I didn’t either – least, till the way one guy smelled made my mouth water. Kinda let my instinct take over after that.” He eyed the blood stain from the wound on Ford’s left shoulder. “You doin’ okay?”

Ford rotated his shoulder and winced at the twinge of pain that resulted. “I’ll be fine. I’ve had worse.”

Stan grunted. “Where’re the kids?”

Ford’s ear twitched as his face shifted. “I left them behind.”

“You _what?!_ Why did you—“

“We ran into Melody.”

Stan cut himself off sharply at Ford’s statement. His eyebrows rose. “Oh.”

“The Master took her and ordered me to finish off the people she was with. Dipper and Mabel….” Ford shook his head.

Stan’s mouth pressed into a straight line as his expression darkened. “And you left them _alone._ When they’re probably going to be _doing_ that.”

Ford was about to respond to this when the street below their feet started rumbling and cracking. Plants started to grow up from the cracks in the cement and asphalt, starting out as shoots but quickly turning into tall trees with thick trunks, vines stretching between them.

Ford and Stan quickly moved out of the way as the cracks became larger, and the plants that emerged from them more exotic and, while visibly beautiful, also dangerous.

A large, bright blue, six-petal flower rose up near where Stan and Ford were standing and turned to face the two of them.

Stan’s eyes widened sharply. “What the – Dipper?!”

“Grunkle Stan! Grunkle Ford!” The face that had formed in the flower’s center gained an expression of relief.

“Is this a part of your powers?” Ford nodded to the trees and flowers that were continuing to grow and spread across the street, turning the street into something that resembled a jungle.

The flower nodded. “Yeah. I’m kind of…spreading my consciousness, I guess? Feels a little weird, though.”

Ford’s ears twitched in interest at the ability that Dipper was displaying.

“Where are ya, kiddo?” Stan asked.

“Uh…we’re kinda near the power plants? Mabel wanted to figure something out and we figured there wouldn’t be anyone here.” Dipper’s expression shifted a little. “Well--”

**_BOOM!!!_ **

The ground shook suddenly as the visible sky between the towers of glass and steel was suddenly lit up with sparkling, purple-blue fireworks that looked very much like shooting stars. Repeated explosions quickly followed as the fireworks themselves exploded in the sky and fell to the ground, causing the ground to shake and distant skyscrapers to topple.

“Gah!” Dipper gained a surprised expression seconds before his face faded from sight as the flower closed up its petals.

Stan and Ford exchanged looks for a moment, nodded, then took off down the street towards where Dipper and Mabel were, if the fireworks were any indication of their location.

Unfortunately, they ended up running head-on into a crowd of panicked people in business suits running from the very place that they needed to go to.

The following fight became a blur to both Stan and Ford. Claws slashed, teeth gnashed, and blood spurted in every direction as the elder twins fought a path through the crowd. Ford knew that he was leaving people to the fate of being trampled, but he wasn’t there to rescue them from Weirdmageddon.

That definitely hadn’t been an option that the Master had given him.

It took Stan and Ford some time to reach where Dipper and Mabel were. Not only was there a crowd of panicked people to fight through, leaving Ford coated in blood and Stan licking off his fingers, but there was also the debris that had been left behind by the fireworks: toppled skyscrapers, with windows smashed open and the broken bodies of those who were unable to escape scattered all over the street and inside the buildings. Some were still moving.

Stan’s face shifted as they reached the debris, eyeing the bodies while Ford noted the green vines that were starting to overtake the toppled buildings and weave into them, bending the metal and ensnaring anyone who happened to be within reach. The two of them moved forward, taking different paths: Stan going through the buildings as nothing more than a black blur, green eyes and teeth, and Ford climbing over them by making use of the vines, which avoided curling around him and stopping him from reaching the other side and instead the tips pulled back like they’d been burned.

Absently, Ford wondered if it was because of Dipper that the plants wouldn’t touch him, or because of what the Master had done to him.

Ford reached the other side of the fallen debris a little bit before Stan burst through the wall, his black, furry feathers flattening out into his familiar appearance seconds later.

“This feels _really weird,_ ” Stan muttered, opening and closing his hands as he glared down at them. “It’s like I’m already used to it, but I’m not. I _shouldn’t_ be.”

“You’re the most changed physically out of all of us.” Ford nodded to Stan, then went back to looking around the area that was on the other side of the debris, taking note of the sparkling craters that looked like maps of the night sky that were scattered under the large trees that were tearing the ground apart as they slowly continued to grow even larger. Smoke was rising up from somewhere ahead of them. “If you’re relying on your instincts, I’m not surprised that you’d feel that way about it.”

“Grunkle Ford! Grunkle Stan!”

Ford looked up when he heard the familiar voice and caught sight of Dipper sitting in one of the trees closest to them. He’d lost his hat, and now Ford could see that there were golden-brown leaves scattered throughout his great-nephew’s hair, and that his birthmark seemed to be pulsing with its own energy somehow. He’d lost his vest as well, and it looked like he was wearing a cloak of bright green leaves.

“Mabel’s up ahead.” Dipper pointed through the trees. “She, uh…she’s not liking her powers very much at the moment.”

“You mean that fireworks display?” Stan raised an eyebrow and snorted. “Can’t be worse than me.”

Ford could sense the unease in his brother’s voice; it was rather clear that Stan was liking their situation less and less, despite the fact that his body had adjusted so well.

“You weren’t here when she made the black hole that set off those fireworks,” Dipper replied. He looked behind him nervously. “She…she killed—“

Ford was running through the trees and around the starlit craters before Dipper had a chance to finish his sentence, his left shoulder throbbing with each step he took.

Mabel was pacing in the center of a large clearing, wringing her hands nervously as her wings fluttered. Her hair almost seemed to be rippling, making the trapped starlight shimmer.

It wasn’t so much the nervous, traumatized look on her face that stopped Ford as it was the small, gray ball that Mabel was pacing around.

Dipper _had_ said that Mabel had made a black hole before the fireworks had gone off….

“Mabel?” Ford asked quietly.

Mabel stopped pacing and turned sharply to face him, letting out a gasp as her wings flared when she caught sight of him. “G-grunkle Ford!” She paled when she saw the blood that soaked his sweater and trench coat, tears gathering in her eyes. “I – I –“

“I know.” Ford’s ears drooped. He didn’t need to say that he knew something about what black holes could do to people – to buildings – when they were sucked in. The gray ball in the middle of the clearing was more than enough proof that Mabel already knew.

Stan and Dipper came into the clearing, and Mabel looked between them for only a moment before running over to hug Stan, tears streaming from her eyes as she buried her face in his suit.

Stan patted her on the back, being careful to avoid touching her wings. The sad expression on his face made him look older and tired.

Dipper reached up, searching for the bill of his hat, and paused when he didn’t find it before letting his hand drop. He sighed. “The entire city’s in a panic. M-most of it is overgrown, and there’s fire spreading all over the place.”

Ford’s tail twitched at the mention of the fires. Stan shot his brother a look.

_“NOT BAD FOR YOUR FIRST RUN!”_

Ford looked up sharply as the Master descended into the clearing. He picked up the gray ball and tossed it back and forth a couple times.

 _“NICE WORK WITH THE RADIOACTIVE STUFF! THE HUMANS ARE DEFINITELEY GOING TO BE IN A PANIC NOW THAT IT’S LOOSE! IT’S PROBABLY CAUSING CANCER IN HUNDREDS OF PEOPLE AS WE SPEAK THANKS TO THOSE FIREWORKS!”_ The Master laughed and ruffled Mabel’s hair. _“AND FEZ! I DIDN’T KNOW THAT YOU COULD BE SO BLOODTHIRSTY – LITERALLY!”_

Stan’s expression soured as Dipper and Mabel looked over at him for a second with wide eyes. Ford, having seen Stan do his dirty work already, kept his gaze pointedly on the Master.

 _“AND SIXER!”_ The Master turned his attention fully on Ford. _“NICE MASSACRE RUN BACK THERE! I LIKE HOW YOU LET THEM GET TRAMPLED – REALLY NICE TOUCH! NEXT TIME, THOUGH, I WANT TO SEE YOU_ REALLY _GET INTO TORTURING THEM – YOU’VE GOT A BRAIN FOR A REASON; MAKE SURE THAT YOU USE IT! DON’T BE AFRAID TO GET CREATIVE!”_

Ford gave a curt nod in response. “I’ll keep that in mind, Master.”

He saw the shudders that went through the others, but he made no comment on it.

The Master snatched up each member of the Pines family, clearly amused. _“DON’T THINK THAT YOU’RE DONE YET! I’VE GOT A SHOW LINED UP, AND YOU’RE ALL THE MAIN ATTRACTIONS! BUT FIRST, WE’RE GONNA WATCH WHAT’S HAPPENING TO THE REST OF THE WORLD! I’M SURE YOU’D ENJOY THAT, FORDSY!”_

Ford’s ears twitched downwards at that, but his expression remained grim and guarded. If that was what the Master wanted, he’d watch.

But that wasn’t a guarantee that he was going to _like_ what he was going to see.


	4. Bill's "Experiment"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's were things cross over into the "The Pines would NOT consent if they had their free will" scenario.
> 
> The second half of this chapter is where things get....disgusting. And it's also the reason I am doubly certain to give Cipher some form of a punishment for what he's done to the Pines.
> 
> Ripping out their willpower and changing them was bad enough. Forcing them to become nothing more than entertainment for himself and his puppets like they were an act from a strip club? It makes me sick.

The Master ended up taking the group back to the Fearamid and dropping the remains of the power plants on a pedestal that formed next to his throne with a snap of his fingers. Then he dropped Stan, Dipper, and Mabel down in front of his throne and turned his attention to Ford, whom he still held in one hand.

_“SHEESH FORDSY, I THOUGHT THAT YOUR REFLEXES WERE BETTER THAN THAT.”_ The Master frowned disapprovingly as a finger poked Ford’s left shoulder, which throbbed in pain in response.

Ford winced at the touch, not exactly sure what he could say in response.

_“WELL, AT LEAST IT’S AN EASY FIX. BUT I_ DON’T _WANT TO HAVE TO GO THROUGH THIS EVERY SINGLE TIME!”_ The Master pressed down even harder on Ford’s shoulder, making the kitsune grit his teeth as the pain flared up with a flash of blue flames before fading completely. _“THERE. DON’T GET SHOT NEXT TIME, ALL RIGHT? I DON’T LIKE MY PUPPETS DAMAGED BY ANYONE OTHER THAN ME.”_

“Understood, Master.”

The Master contemplated Ford for a moment longer, then put him down in front of his throne with the others. Then the Master settled into his throne and snapped his fingers, summoning a full martini glass.

At the same time, the floor suddenly fell away, revealing that the Fearamid had _moved._

Ford shifted his stance a little out of surprise, expecting to fall into the destroyed city below them at any moment. However, when he found that he was still standing on solid ground despite the fact that there was no ground to stand on, he relaxed his stance slightly.

The Master cackled. _“MAN, THESE GUYS DON’T KNOW HOW TO PARTY VERY WELL, DO THEY? JUST BECAUSE I WAS CLEARING OUT SOME UNWANTED GUESTS THEY GO COMPLETELY BONKERS. PARTY POOPERS.”_ He sipped from his martini. _“WHELP, BETTER NOT KEEP THIS LIBERATED DIMENSION WAITING! TIME TO MAKE SURE THAT THE HUMANS KNOW WHO’S RUNNING THE SHOW!”_

The Master snapped his fingers, and suddenly the Pines family were standing on the front lawn of the White House. The Master hovered over them with a smug expression in his eye as all the cameras that had been pointed at the President turned suddenly in his direction.

_“PINE TREE, KEEP ‘EM STILL.”_

Dipper’s face shifted into one of concentration, and the crowd of reporters suddenly let out cries of alarm and fear as the grass at their feet suddenly grew up into large, entangling vines that wrapped around their legs and waists. Some tried to run, only to end up getting tripped and entangled in the plants.

“What is this?!” a man in a suit barked. “What the hell’s going on here?!”

_“OH ZIP IT.”_

The man’s mouth rather abruptly turned into a zipper and zipped itself shut, causing the man to try to scramble to open his mouth again. The vines caught his arms and held them down before he could reach it.

_“THAT’S BETTER! NOW THAT I’VE GOT YOUR ATTENTION – HI! THE NAME’S BILL CIPHER! BUT YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR NEW LORD AND MASTER FOR ALL OF ETERNITY!”_

“What makes you think that we’re going to listen to you?” a woman demanded.

Ford’s ears flicked back as he eyed the Master, unsure of what to expect as a response from him.

_“OH, LOTS OF THINGS!”_ The Master’s form flickered through a multitude of images – mostly triangles that could easily be seen in architecture, on money, and various natural formations. **_“LOTS OF THINGS.”_**

“The Illuminati!” someone screamed. “It’s real!”

_“YOU REALLY THINK I’M A PART OF THAT, HUH?”_ The Master laughed. _“SURE, KEEP BELIEVING THAT!”_ He gained a serious expression a moment later. _“SERIOUSLY, THOUGH, YOU’RE NO LONGER IN POWER.”_

“You have no authority here, monster!” the man standing at the podium yelled. “What makes you think you can just waltz in and just claim that you have any power—“

_“THIS DOES!”_ The Master snapped his fingers, sending blue sparks flying.

The man and the podium caught fire and burned to ash in an instant.

The crowd of men and women entangled in the vines stared in shock, their heads going back and forth between where the man had been a moment ago, the Master, and each other.

“He just killed the President!” someone shrieked.

One of Ford’s eyebrows rose a little at that. That had been the President?

_“YEAH. AND WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT IT? I’M ALL-POWERFUL! YOU WOULDN’T BE ABLE TO STAND A SNOWBALL’S CHANCE IN HELL AGAINST ME! SEE THESE FOUR?”_ The Master motioned to the Pines family standing below him. _“THEY THOUGHT THEY COULD STOP ME FROM TAKING WEIRDMAGEDDON GLOBAL! AND_ THIS _GUY HAS BEEN FIGHTING AGAINST ME FOR THIRTY YEARS! HAVEN’T YOU, FORDSY?”_ He rubbed a finger between Ford’s ears.

“Yes, Master,” Ford replied with a tired sigh.

_“AND NOW HE’S AN OBEDIENT LITTLE PUPPET – HIM AND HIS ENTIRE FAMILY! WELL, THE FAMILY THAT MATTERS, ANYWAY. DO YOU HAVE ANY OTHER FAMILY, FORDSY?”_

“From what I understand, my brother Sherman still lives.” Ford sent a glance over at Stan. “Dipper and Mabel have parents and, no doubt, other relatives, as well.”

_“AH! WE’LL JUST HAVE TO PAY THEM A VISIT LATER, THEN! I’D LOVE TO MEET THEM!”_

Dipper and Mabel both paled at that.

Ford had to admit; he was a little curious about what Dipper’s and Mabel’s parents were like, but meeting them like this? That was not the kind of family reunion he was looking forward to.

“We’ll stop you!” someone yelled – a woman this time. “We’ll find a way to stop this – this Weirdmageddon! You’ve got to have a weakness – everyone does!”

The Master remained silent for only a moment before he burst out laughing loudly. _“DO YOU REALLY THINK THAT YOU’LL BE ABLE TO FIND IT? THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME IN THIS WORLD ARE THESE FOUR PUPPETS RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU, AND THEY’RE NOT GOING TO TELL YOU ANYTHING CONCERNING POSSIBLE WEAKNESSES. GO AHEAD – ASK!”_

The men and women looked at each other while Ford mentally steeled himself. He didn’t know what sorts of questions were going to be asked, but he knew that he was going to have to be prepared for anything.

“What happened in Oregon when that bubble appeared?” a woman spoke up. Ford saw the microphone pointed over at them.

“A dimensional rift opened above the town of Gravity Falls, and the Master entered this dimension,” Ford replied. “The ‘bubble,’ as you call it, was a natural magnetism that was keeping the weirdness of Weirdmageddon trapped within the town’s borders. A simple equation was all that was needed in order to unleash Weirdmageddon on the rest of the world.”

An expected question – of course people were going to be curious about how it started.

Whispers ran through the crowd – Ford was only able to catch a few snatches of words, mostly revolving around the fact that the idea of another dimension was pretty much impossible.

“The monsters came through with that thing too, then?” someone else motioned up to the Master with their microphone.

“F-for the most part,” Dipper spoke up. “There are some monsters that have been in hiding in our world that we used to think were myths. Gravity Falls is full of those creatures – unicorns, gnomes, ghosts – it was kind of hard to avoid them.”

“You’re not lying, are you?” a third person demanded.

Ford and Dipper shook their heads, Dipper’s antlers branches rattling together a little while Ford’s tail twitched at the accusation.

“Why are you following that monster’s orders, then? You’ve probably got good heads on your shoulders – fight back! Sabotage him or something!”

The Master made a noise that sounded suspiciously like muffled laughter.

Ford bowed his head and shook it in response to the question. “We can’t.”

“Why not? I don’t see any chains connecting you to him.”

Why was this man so calm in the face of the Master? It was rather clear that the other members of the group were shaking in their shoes and had more than likely wet themselves in fear of the dream demon and what was going on around them. While the capital appeared to be relatively intact for now, Ford had no doubt that the chaos that was hitting the rest of the world would hit the eastern coast in full force soon enough.

The Master was having an even more difficult time keeping his laughter in, now.

Ford sighed and lifted his head again. “I doubt that you would be able to. I’m not entirely sure of what it is that the Master did to us, but I do know this: as we are now, without him, we would be unable to function.”

“Why?”

At the question, Ford saw something shimmer in the corner of his eye, and he felt something jerk at his wrists and pull his arms up in front of him, palms up. His eyes widened when he saw the sky-blue strings that were wrapped around his wrists, stretched taunt by some force.

_“I CALLED THEM PUPPETS FOR A REASON, YOU KNOW.”_ The Master was very pleased with himself. _“THEY CAN’T FIGHT BACK BECAUSE I’M THE ONE PULLING THE STRINGS!”_

Ford saw the expressions of the others shift to ones of alarm as his arms dropped limply back to his sides, the strings fading from sight and being replaced by the manacles that he was getting used to seeing. He hadn’t thought that there would actually be a physical representation of their present connection to the Master.

_“KEEP THAT IN MIND, ALL RIGHT? YOU MAKE ME ANGRY ENOUGH, AND I COULD DO THE SAME TO YOU! BUT THAT’S PROBABLY NOT GOING TO HAPPEN BECAUSE THERE’S NO WAY THAT YOU’RE EVER GOING TO FIND OUT MY WEAKNESS!”_ The Master laughed. _“THIS DIMENSION IS NOW GOING TO BE A PARTY THAT NEVER ENDS, WITH A HOST THAT NEVER DIES! HOPE YOU ALL HAVE FUN!”_

The Master snapped his fingers again, and they were back in the Fearamid, with its floor still seemingly missing even though it wasn’t. The landscape below had changed, however – no longer was it a destroyed city below them, but the momentarily intact Washington, D.C.

Ford got the feeling that it wasn’t going to remain intact for too much longer, if Weirdmageddon had spread across the globe and brought who knew what kinds of monsters with it.

_“NOW…I THINK IT’S ABOUT TIME TO SHIFT GEARS. I DID SOME POKING AROUND, AND I THINK I’VE FIGURED OUT WHAT EXACTLY WE’RE GONNA EXPERIMENT WITH WHEN IT COMES TO HUMAN ENTERTAINMENT!”_

“About time!” Pyronica waltzed into the throne room, followed shortly by the rest of the Henchmaniacs. All of them had wild, manic looks on their faces – almost as though they were planning on destroying something at any moment. “So, what do you have in mind, Boss?”

_“OH, NOTHING MUCH – JUST SOME FUNNY-LOOKING DANCES THAT SOME HUMANS DO.”_

Ford’s ears twitched. Dancing? Did that mean the Master was going to have them dance the foxtrot or something?

The view of the world below them faded back into the black brickwork as four black, smooth poles rose up in the center of the room, arranged in a straight line and with enough room between them for Teeth to walk through without bumping into them.

To Ford’s left, Stan sucked in a breath sharply.

_“OH HO! ONE OF THE PUPPETS KNOWS WHAT DANCE THIS IS! HAVE YOU DONE IT BEFORE, FEZ?”_

“No, Master.” Stan’s response came through gritted teeth. “But I’ve seen it done.”

_“EH. GOOD ENOUGH.”_

Ford’s mind raced at Stan’s response, trying to think of a connection between the poles and Stan’s reaction. _What sort of dance could—_

A memory flickered into his mind then – one of the seedier places that he’d ended up traveling to when he had been on the run from the Master. The brand of entertainment in the darker places in that dimension had been distasteful to say the least, and Ford had made it a point to leave as quickly as possible before he could lose what food he had managed to swallow.

One of the performances had clearly been designed to be…sexually arousing…and the stage _had_ been set in a similar manner to –

Ford paled as he clenched his teeth.

_“YOU KNOW, YOUR CLOTHES DON’T LOOK LIKE THE PROPER ATTIRE FOR SOMETHING LIKE THIS.”_ The Master sounded smug. _“TAKE ‘EM OFF.”_

_What?_

Ford’s eyes widened in alarm, but he couldn’t stop himself from following the Master’s orders; already, his trench coat was falling to the floor of the Fearamid with a wet _thwump_ from all the blood that it had absorbed in Portland.

Something at the back of his mind tried to urge him to fight back, but he stopped that train of thought immediately. The Master was controlling them like the puppets they were, and he knew full well that there was nothing he could do about it.

Ford sighed as he grabbed the bottom of his red turtleneck sweater and started to pull it up, closing his eyes in order to protect them from the blood that the fabric had absorbed.

The sweater was halfway over his head when the wolf whistles started.

Pyronica let out a shriek. “ _Dang,_ Bill! If that’s what all smarty-pants humans look like underneath their clothes I’m gonna have to hunt down one of my own!”

Ford heard strangled gasps from Dipper and Mabel as he threw the article of clothing behind him, fully revealing the countless scars that marred his chest, back, and arms: the tattoos that were meant to act as wards to keep evil spirits at bay (like those were going to be of use to him now), long, clawed marks where his flesh had been shredded, burns from laser guns and from where he had destroyed the brands that bounty hunters and others had forced on him…

…the electric burns that crisscrossed his body as a result of the torture that the Master had been giving him not too long before his family’s rescue attempt.

The Master laughed. _“FORDSY’S ONE OF A KIND, RONNIE! YOU’RE GONNA HAVE A HARD TIME FINDING SOMEONE LIKE HIM, I CAN TELL YOU THAT! I MEAN, JUST LOOK AT HIS BROTHER – MAN, FEZ REALLY LET HIMSELF GO!”_

The Henchmaniacs cackled in agreement as Stan threw his shirt to the wayside.

Mabel and Dipper made nervous-sounding noises, making Ford realize with a jolt that Bill was going to make them _all_ participate.

_Dipper and Mabel are too young for this, they shouldn’t – no, I have no control over this._

Ford started repeating a mantra in his head as he worked at his pants. _Don’t think don’t think don’t think don’t think—_

His vision wavered suddenly, but his body didn’t stumble with it. Everything started to blur together, and Ford suddenly felt detached from what it was that he was doing and what was going on around him. Even as his body continued to move, his mind started to drift away from the Fearamid and the events within. His attention turned inward instinctively, towards other places and memories.

Within seconds, Ford’s mind was completely and blissfully blank.

**Another Place, another Time.**

Ford awoke with a pained gasp, his ears plastering themselves against his head as he looked around wildly, the last dredges of the memory refusing to fade from his mind no matter how much he tried to focus on where he was _._

The wooden walls of the bedroom and the other three beds with their occupants attempted to give way, drag him back into his memories as music pounded in his head and made his bones vibrate—

Ford shook his head vigorously, shuddering as he tried and again failed to push the memory to the back of his mind. Instinctively, he started to curl in on himself, attempting to shut the world away.

_Don’t think don’t think don’t think--_

“Sixer?”

Ford lifted his head sharply upon hearing the concerned voice, and he caught sight of a figure standing in the doorway – a teenage girl with brown hair and blue eyes that almost seemed to glow in the dark.

The Guildmaster.

“Sounds like you were having a bad nightmare.” The Guildmaster stepped carefully into the room, her red boots making metallic tapping noises against the wooden floor as she started towards him. “It’s…because of earlier, right? The song triggers?”

Ford gave a shaky nod, watching the girl as she approached his bed. She hesitated for a moment before sitting at the foot of the bed, resting one hand on the bedpost and the other on the sheets near his feet – near, but not touching him.

“I’m sorry that we didn’t think that something like…like _that_ …could have been something that Cipher would have forced you to do.” The Guildmaster bit her lower lip, a sorrowful look in her eyes.

The more knowledgeable part of Ford found it hard to make the connection between the girl in front of him and the six-tailed, fox-like creature who had helped him when he had still been fighting against everything that his old master had been attempting to do.

Still, he had seen how she’d acted around the others in the house, and he knew that the Vulpix who had assisted him on one world and the girl in front of him were truly the same person. The Multiverse was certainly an interesting place.

“After you…blacked out, I guess, I made sure to tell the others to be careful about what music they play out loud. The kids don’t know what you guys have gone through, but the rest of us have a few ideas.” The Guildmaster’s gaze hardened for a moment before her face softened, and she sighed and shook her head. “What I’m trying to say is, I’m going to make sure that _that_ specific trigger doesn’t happen again.”

Ford’s ears hesitantly rose at that as he blinked, watching her silently.

Then the pounding music came back into his head with a vengeance and he winced back as his hands started to move to take off his sweater and—

“NO!” The Guildmaster grabbed his wrists and pulled them back, the touch and shout startling Ford. “I am _not_ going to use you like that. No one in this house is.”

Ford shuddered at her touch, still feeling emotionally imbalanced because of the memories flooding his mind, but the Guildmaster’s words caused his body to relax some.

Still, there was also a part of him that laughed bitterly at the Guildmaster’s statement. She claimed that she had a few ideas as to what he had gone through, but she was much too _naïve_ to think that he wasn’t going to be used.

“I’m going to stick with you until you go back to sleep.” The Guildmaster grabbed a nearby wooden chair and pulled it over so that it was next to the head of Ford’s bed. She let go of his wrists and moved off the bed to sit down on the chair instead, then reached under her orange jacket and pulled out what looked like a shimmering, yellow-green feather. It was worn and frayed in a few places and obviously well-used.

Ford’s ears twitched when he caught sight of it, and he blinked a couple times with slight, curious surprise.

“This is a Lunar Wing,” the Guildmaster explained. “It can help keep away nightmares – and that includes memories that rise up at the worst of times.” She gave a smile, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “I know it works, since I’ve had problems with that kind of thing in the past.”

Ford caught sight of something flickering in the girl’s eyes – it made them look older than she was. Much older, and much more experienced. It was gone in a moment, however, leaving a far younger, kind expression.

“I used to use this a lot,” the Guildmaster admitted, “but then the power that these feathers are imbued with stopped having a real lasting effect on me.” She held the feather out to him. “Take it; it’ll help you sleep a little better.”

Ford took the feather from the Guildmaster’s hand carefully, but without hesitation. It had certainly seen years of wear, but it was still holding itself together rather well regardless.

“Please, Sixer, try to get some sleep.” The Guildmaster glanced at the pillow before looking back at Ford. “I know it’s hard to do that after a nightmare, but…we still have five hours until everyone else is going to be up, and you _and_ your counterparts all have bad sleep schedules.” She frowned. “I don’t want you to collapse from exhaustion in the middle of something.”

Ford’s ears twitched at the comment, and he gave a slight nod and lay down on his side, facing the Guildmaster and gripping the Lunar Wing in one hand. He watched the Guildmaster as she adjusted her sitting position, making the chair creak a little as she made herself more comfortable.

As a result, he didn’t really notice the Lunar Wing’s soft glow until his mind really began to clear of the memories that had been troubling him. His ears stood up as his eyes widened in surprise.

The Guildmaster noticed, and she gave a small, relieved smile. “It’s working.”

Ford’s eyes suddenly felt heavy – perhaps because of the effect of the Lunar Wing, perhaps because of the Guildmaster’s order to sleep finally taking effect. Either way, they soon closed as his panicked heart slowed.

A moment later, someone started humming softly – a slow, soothing melody that was nothing like the music that had been pounding in Ford’s head a moment ago. Then a hand rested itself gently on his head between his ears, making him stiffen for a moment before a pulse of soothing heat traveled from the hand and into him. He didn’t know why, but…it felt calming in a way that the humming wasn’t.

Instinct pushed him up against the hand a little as he sank deeper into the bed, suddenly feeling safer than he had felt a few minutes ago.

The voice kept humming as Ford drifted off into a near-dreamless slumber – except for the song, which stayed with him until morning.

 


	5. Uneven Deals

When the world came back into focus, Ford found himself lying on a plush bed without anything to cover himself besides the blankets, which happened to be a searing hot pink and were also…on fire? And weren’t hurting him?

When Ford searched his memories for what he had been doing before, he found that there was a gap between now and when the Master had told himself and his family to –

Oh.

Ford pushed that last lucid memory to the back of his mind, shaking his head. He couldn’t afford to think about that now and try to see what he had done – he had more important things to think about. Where was the Master? Where was _he?_

_“AHA! FINALLY AWAKE, I SEE!”_

Ford stiffened as the Master hovered into view, looking him over with an amused expression.

 _“TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH, FORDSY! GUESS WE TUCKERED YOU OUT, HUH?”_ The Master poked Ford in the chest with his cane, pressing down on an old scar that looked like something had tried to rip Ford in half horizontally.

There came a woman’s cackle from somewhere nearby – Pyronica.

Ford gave a slight nod. “I…suppose so, Master.”

_“PYRONICA’S FOUND YOU SOME STUFF TO WEAR; YOUR OLD DUDS WEREN’T QUITE DOING IT FOR ME. THESE ONES ARE MUCH BETTER.”_

A bundle of black cloth was dropped on Ford’s stomach; he looked at it with an indifferent expression.

_“WELL? PUT ‘EM ON, FORDSY! I’VE GOT PLANS TODAY AND I DON’T PLAN ON HAVING TO WAIT AROUND WHILE YOU GET UP AT A SNAIL’S PACE.”_

Ford sat up and pulled the pile of black cloth apart to see what it was that he had been given.

His search revealed a black turtleneck sweater that was pulled over his head rather quickly. His ears twitched as the material brushed past them, and the sweater itself fit him rather snugly.

Absently, he noted that his glasses and manacles were staying in place regardless of the fact that he didn’t have anything to prop his glasses up on the sides of his head, and he was pulling on clothes over the manacles, yet under them at the same time. Ford chalked it up to magic and moved to pulling on the rest of the outfit that had been given to him: black pants with a hole cut in the back for his tail, boots that were sewn from some sort of dragonhide and clearly made to last, and a black trench coat with a one-eyed yellow triangle on the back – the Master’s symbol.

The Master pulled Ford to the center of the room and circled around him, looking his puppet over with an expression of approval. _“GOOD, GOOD. THIS DEFINITELY SUITS YOU BETTER, FORDSY.”_ He turned to look at Pyronica, who was standing near the door at the other end of the room. Ford noticed that the room was actually somewhat sweltering. _“NICE WORK, RONNIE!”_

“Anything to make him look good for you, boss.” Pyronica gave a feral grin. “What are we gonna do now?”

 _“THOSE HUMAN GOVERNMENTS HAVE BEEN TRYING TO GET SOME SEMBLANCE OF WHAT THEY CALL ‘NORMAL’. THEY AREN’T EVEN PARTYING!”_ The Master mimed shaking a head in disapproval. _“I GUESS THEY MISINTERPRETED MY MESSAGE WHEN I VAPORZED THE BIG GUY IN THIS REGION. WE’LL HAVE TO FIX THAT.”_

“Oh, boy.” Pyronica’s grin widened. “Does that mean we get to go out and destroy more stuff? There were a couple places that I think would look _great_ as party torches.”

 _“DEFINITELY – YOU GO AHEAD AND DO THAT! FIND A COUPLE MONSTERS THAT YOU THINK’D DO WELL WITH SETTING PLACES ON FIRE – OR BEING SET ON FIRE, DOESN’T MATTER! I’M GONNA TAKE FORD AND SEE TO A COUPLE GUESTS THAT GOT IN WITH THE INTENT TO KILL.”_ The Master made a motion with one hand; a thin blue chain materialized and connected itself to the collar around Ford’s neck. He gave it a couple experimental tugs, then started out of the room.

Ford followed after him obediently, silently, not letting the chain get too taunt and pull at his neck. He remained a little behind the Master, keeping his gaze forward as they moved into the throne room.

In the center of the throne room, Dipper was standing next to two men wearing black suits who were trapped in vines. Dipper was now wearing brown pants that were shredded at the bottom and what looked like a vest of green leaves under the thorns crossing over his chest.

Ford’s gaze wandered for only a second, catching sight of Mabel and Stan kneeling in front of the throne, both wearing new clothes as well – Mabel was wearing something similar to what other fairies wore, while Stan’s suit looked a little more sleezy than it had been.

The two men looked up, and Ford blinked in surprise as he returned his attention to them. They were the two government agents who he’d seen after he’d arrived back in this dimension – the ones he’d wiped the memories of with the memory gun Dipper had given him.

“ _You!”_ the two men exclaimed together.

Apparently, they remembered him, too.

“Whatever’s going on here, if you’re playing a joke I doubt that it would be considered funny,” one of the agents said, frowning.

“I can confirm that it’s not,” the other said.

Ford said nothing.

 _“MAN, YOU TWO ARE REAL STICKS-IN-THE-MUD,”_ the Master commented dryly. _“IS EVERYONE FROM YOUR GOVERNMENT THIS WAY, FORDSY?”_

“As far as I’m aware of in the present day, yes.”

The Master hummed. _“AND WHAT DID YOU TWO THINK YOU WERE GOING TO ACCOMPLISH? STABBING OUT MY EYE? TEARING MY HAT TO PIECES? BECAUSE YOU LOOK A LITTLE TIED UP AT THE MOMENT.”_

The agents struggled against the vines, but they only tightened at a motion from Dipper.

“Every monster has a weakness!” the blond agent barked. “And we’re going to find yours – count on it!”

The Master burst out laughing. _“DO YOU REALLY THINK THAT A WEAKNESS IS GOING TO BE SO EASY TO FIND? ESPECIALLY MINE? THE ONLY OTHER PEOPLE ALIVE WHO KNOW ANYTHING THAT COULD HAVE EVEN REMOTELY HELPED YOU ARE RIGHT HERE IN THIS ROOM! AND LOOK AT THEM NOW!”_

The Master made a wide motion with one hand, and the banners on the wall behind the throne suddenly came to life, fists slamming against invisible walls as the figures in them let out silent screams, tears streaming down their cheeks when they caught sight of Ford and the others.

Ford’s ears pressed back against his head in alarm when he saw Fiddleford staring straight at him before falling into a panic attack.

The Master motioned again, and the banners froze again with their new distraught, terrified expressions.

“You are a sick, twisted fiend,” commented the black-haired agent. “And you are not going to keep this place of power forever. We _will_ find your weakness, and we will go through any means necessary in order to do so.”

Ford said nothing, but he knew that whatever their methods were, they weren’t going to be as painful as what the Master had done to them.

The Master yawned in response to the agent’s words. “ _YOU GOVERNMENT DOGS ARE ALL THE SAME – YOU JUST CAN’T SEE THE BIGGER PICTURE! I WONDER IF SOME OF THAT BLED OFF INTO THE PINES, BECAUSE I HAD TO FORCE THEM TO SEE THINGS MY WAY! ISN’T THAT RIGHT?”_

There came a chorus of “Yes, Master” in response, getting the agents to look at them in surprise. Recognition crossed their faces moments later.

“Wait a second – Pines?” The blond agent turned to look at his partner. “Weren’t we supposed to have been investigating a family with that name?”

“Yes, that’s right.” The black-haired agent frowned. “We got a lot of flack from the higher-ups for coming back from a clearly troubled area without any memory of the event….”

Dipper and Ford exchanged looks across the room. The Master noticed.

 _“WHAT DID YOU DO, FORDSY?”_ The Master tugged on Ford’s leash in order get him to look up at the triangle.

“Dipper somehow managed to get his hands on a memory erasing gun,” Ford explained, turning his gaze to the yellow triangle. “In order to prevent the agents from discovering the portal in the basement of my house, I matched the radio frequency of their headsets and used that to wipe their memories of some of the more crucial events that had just taken place – mainly, gravity reversing itself.”

“Portal?” the agents repeated in unison, clearly confused.

“You mean it _wasn’t_ a weapon of mass destruction?” the blond agent asked in surprise. “This sounds like something out of a science fiction novel.”

“Which should mean that you should have known better than to attempt to rip a hole in the time/space continuum,” the black-haired agent growled.

_“OH, I HAD HIM BUILD IT LIKE THAT SO THAT I COULD GAIN A PHYSICAL FORM IN THIS DIMENSION INSTEAD OF POSSESSING PEOPLE! ISN’T THAT RIGHT, FORDSY?”_

“Yes, Master.”

The Master chuckled and ruffled Ford’s hair, causing his ears to twitch as his fingers brushed against them. Then he turned and looked back at the two agents. _“NOW, WHAT TO DO ABOUT YOU TWO….”_

“Even if you kill us, you’re not going to stop us from trying to destroy you!” the blond agent snapped. “We’ll find your weakness, even if we have to send every single member of Special Ops in here!”

 _“CLEARLY, YOU PEOPLE DIDN’T HEAR ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED WITH TIME BABY,”_ the Master said in a bored tone. _“ALL RIGHT. HEY, FEZ.”_

Stan looked up.

_“WHICH ONE DO YOU THINK YOU COULD MIMIC BETTER?”_

Stan frowned at that, his eyes flickering green for a moment. “Probably not Powers. The guy wasn’t born with a sense of humor, apparently.”

_“REALLY? WE’LL HAVE TO SEE ABOUT FIXING THAT. DEVOUR THE OTHER ONE.”_

The blond agent looked alarmed. “Wait, what are you—“

Stan lunged forward, his form shifting into the black humanoid shape as his mouth stretched open wide, revealing rows of sharp teeth that he promptly buried in the agent’s right shoulder, getting a yell of pain and terror from the man as Stan started gnawing and turned his right arm into nothing more than a bloody stump.

“Wh-wh-wha—“ The agent let out another scream as Stan tore his left leg off and promptly slurped it down like a meaty noodle before doing the same to his other leg and remaining arm. As the blood started to pool from the open wounds, Stan chomped down on the agent’s head, cutting him off mid-scream before eating what remained.

The other agent – Powers, apparently – stared at the display with an expression of shock and horror. Dipper – and Mabel, who hadn’t been watching but had more than likely been listening – looked sick.

Probably the only one in the room who didn’t look terrified or about to throw up was Ford, if only because of his experiences on the other side of the portal.

Stan shifted back to his human form and dug the agent’s earpiece out of his mouth, gagging a bit. “Eugh. Meat was a bit tough.”

Dipper let out a gagging noise that sounded like he was going to throw up at any moment, but he didn’t double over and spit out the contents of his stomach. Absently, Ford wondered when they would start feeling the affects of hunger and how long it’d been since they had last eaten – Stan excluded.

_“DO YOUR THING, FEZ!”_

Stan grunted in response. His body started to grow skinnier, and he stood taller as his hair’s color shifted from gray to the bright yellow the agent’s had been.

“Testing, testing.” Stan cleared his throat a couple times as his voice shifted from its normal gruffness to the youthfulness of his last meal – along with his face. Then he turned and looked at Powers with an appraising look.

“Impossible.” Powers looked pale. “How did – what –“

 _“CLEARLY, YOU PEOPLE HAVEN’T SEEN A PUPPET LIKE MINE BEFORE.”_ The Master sounded amused. _“FEZ IS A ONE-OF-A-KIND, BONEFIED FAE MONSTER – A CHANGELING, IF YOU WILL. AND HE’S GOING TO TAKE YOUR PARTNER’S PLACE FOR A LITTLE WHILE.”_ The Master fixed his gaze pointedly on Stan. _“WHICH MEANS YOU’RE GOING TO BE INFILTRATING WHAT THOSE MEATSACKS CALL A ‘GOVERNMENT’ FOR A WHILE.”_

“Yes, Master.”

One of Ford’s ears twitched when he heard the tired tone in his brother’s voice.

Hearing his partner’s voice say those words only made Powers gape in horror at Stan.

“ _AND AS FOR YOU, NO HUMOR, YOU’RE GONNA BE STAYING HERE. CAN’T HAVE YOU DROPPING HINTS THAT YOUR PARTNER ISN’T YOUR PARTNER, NOW CAN WE?”_ The Master made a lazy motion with one hand. _“LET’S SAY YOU GOT A JOB AS MY AMBASSADORS OR SOMETHING, BUT I’VE GOT TO KEEP ONE OF YOU HERE WITH ME. YEAH, LET’S GO WITH THAT.”_

“You’re not going to be able to keep up the charade for long,” Powers snarled as the Master motioned for Dipper to shift the vines around so that only his upper body was tightly bound, the boy holding onto one end in order to keep the agent from running too far. “They’ll know that Trigger isn’t Trigger.”

Stan – still in his “Trigger” form, as the other agent had been apparently named – looked hurt. “Ah, come on! That really stings!”

“Not as much as a court marshal will, Trigger!” Powers eyes widened a second later when he realized what it was that he’d just said.

 _“WELL, IF HE FOOLED YOU, I’D SAY THAT HE’LL BE ABLE TO FOOL YOUR BUDDIES.”_ The Master gave the impression that he was grinning. _“GET GOING, FEZ! AND MAKE IT LOOK CONVINCING.”_

“With all his memories in my head, Master, I doubt that’s going to be a problem.” Stan tapped the side of Trigger’s – _his_ – head.

_“THAT’S THE IDEA!”_

The Master snapped his fingers, and Stan was gone in a flash of blue, leaving Powers staring at where the changeling had been a moment ago. The agent quickly recovered himself, however, and he started fighting against Dipper’s vines immediately in order to free himself.

“You aren’t going to get away with this!” Powers snapped.

 _“ON THE CONTRARY.”_ The Master moved closer to Powers and Dipper, half-dragging, half-leading Ford after him. _“THE ONLY REASON THAT YOU MEATSACKS ARE STILL ALIVE IS BECAUSE MY HENCHMANIACS AND I NEED A LITTLE ENTERTAINMENT. I COULD WIPE YOU ALL OUT WITH A SNAP OF MY FINGERS IF I WANTED TO!”_ He raised his hand and brought his fingers together threateningly, as though he was about to snap them and end all life as they knew it.

_“BUT I WON’T, BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE TOO BORING.”_

The Master lowered his hand, and Ford saw Powers’ shoulders relax slightly out of relief, despite the grim mask that he kept on his face.

 _“SPREADING CHAOS AND GETTING YOU MEATSACKS TO JOIN MY NEVER-ENDING PARTY, THOUGH….”_ The Master’s eye quirked into what was probably a grin. _“THAT’S SOMETHING I MIGHT BE ABLE TO GET BEHIND, IF YOU AMUSE ME ENOUGH. BUT IN ORDER FOR YOU TO DO THAT, YOU’RE GOING TO NEED A SENSE OF HUMOR!”_

The Master made a finger gun and mimed shooting at Powers, sending a bolt of energy between his finger and Powers’ head. The agent collapsed to the ground as soon as the connection was cut, eyes rolling to the back of his head as the power clearly knocked him out cold.

The Master snapped his fingers, teleporting Powers out of the throne room in a flash. _“NOW, WHAT TO DO, WHAT TO DO…I KNOW! YOU TWO – PINE TREE, SHOOTING STAR – GET OUT THERE AND CAUSE SOME MORE CHAOS! WORK YOUR WAY AROUND – MEET UP WITH THE HENCHMANIACS AND MESS WITH PEOPLE! SCARE YOUR FAMILY HALF TO DEATH AND THEN SOME! SPREAD MY PARTY SPIRIT AROUND, AND KIDNAP PEOPLE IF YOU HAVE TO IN ORDER TO GET THEM TO SEE MY PARTY FAVORS! THE BUBBLES OF PURE MADNESS SHOULD HAVE SPREAD WORLD-WIDE BY NOW – GETTING PEOPLE TO GO THROUGH THOSE WOULD BE A REAL HOOT!”_

Dipper and Mabel exchanged looks at that, clearly nervous, but they looked back up at the Master and said their affirmatives quickly before slipping out of the throne room and through an opening in the wall that the Master made appear with a snap of his fingers. Ford caught sight of Mabel grabbing her brother and flying off into the air before the hole closed up behind them, leaving him and the Master alone in the throne room.

Ford wasn’t exactly sure what this was going to entail for him.

The Master floated over to his throne and sat down on the stone, pulling Ford over and making him sit in front of the left armrest. _“NOW, LET’S SEE WHO KRYPTOS IS BRINGING ME.”_

Ford’s ear twitched curiously at that as he looked up at the Master. Why wasn’t he out with the others, causing chaos and enjoying himself as he wished?

“I’m back, boss!” Kryptos came into the room, carrying a number of humans in his arms – all struggling against his thin but probably deceptively strong arms. “Found these guys just where you said they’d be!”

 _“EXCELLENT.”_ The Master rubbed his hands together. _“GO AHEAD AND PUT ‘EM DOWN, KRYPTIE, THEY’RE NOT GONNA BE GOING ANYWHERE.”_

Kryptos put the humans down on the floor, and Ford’s ears perked forward as he looked over each one in turn: men and women, wearing well-tailored suits (in an apocalypse?) and giving the impression that they were clearly used to being in charge and did _not_ like being carried by a creature such as Kryptos.

 _“GREETINGS, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.”_ The Master steepled his fingers. _“I ASSUME YOU ALL KNOW WHY I SUMMONED YOU?”_

One of the men – clearly older than the others judging by his gray hair, but still spry – stepped forward and glared up at the Master. “You promised me that _I_ would be the _only_ one to sit by your side and rule the underworld when you took over this world! What’s with all these people – and _him?!”_ He pointed at Ford accusingly.

Ford felt the hair on the back of his neck rise a little at the accusing stare, but a touch of Bill’s fingers between his ears caused his tensing muscles to relax almost instantly.

 _“FORDSY’S NOTHING MORE THAN A PET; DON’T WORRY ABOUT HIM.”_ The Master scratched Ford’s head for a moment longer before pulling his hand back. _“AND I DID PROMISE YOU ALL SOMETHING IF YOU KEPT UP YOUR ENDS OF YOUR DEALS.”_

Ford’s ears perked up. The Master had made deals with these people? What would they have that would make him even want to consider it? They clearly weren’t capable of offering the kinds of skills that he had thirty years ago.

“ _I_ certainly did,” the man who’d spoken huffed. “Twenty years is a long time to wait for you to show up, Bill.”

“Twenty?” a young man – perhaps in his thirties – looked at the other in surprise. “I only met him ten years ago! He’d told me that I was the first human that he’d come into contact with!”

“Seriously?” a woman looked at the others with an equally surprised expression. “He told _me_ that he was working with a guy who was helping him come over into our world, but they’d hit a few snags!”

Ford’s ears flicked back. The Master was clearly playing these people for fools. Just as he had been played before.

 _“A FEW, YEAH.”_ The Master chuckled, sinister undertones running through his voice. _“BUT I FIGURED THEM OUT AND GOT AROUND THEM NO PROBLEM! NOW, ABOUT YOUR ENDS OF THE DEALS….”_

It turned out that these men and women were the leaders of various underground organizations – the kinds of places and movements that Ford and Stan always heard about when they were younger, like the Italian and Russian Mafias.

While that kind of a life had never really interested Ford, Stan had talked about pretending to be a bouncer for a mob’s secret club and putting his boxing skills to good use – jokingly, of course, since their childhood dream had been something else entirely.

Ford really only listened to the conversation with half an ear, considering that whatever it was that the Master and the others he had apparently made deals were talking about didn’t affect him directly. Their deals all seemed so trivial in comparison to his own – corrupting the government by rigging certain political elections and decisions, weakening the economy, killing off a specific person here and there…

 _He’d_ been the one to make an interdimensional portal and bring the Master to this dimension. None of these people had helped with that.

_“WHAT DO YOU HAVE ON YOUR MIND, FORDSY?”_

“Pardon my _doubt_ , Master, but I don’t see how these people could have been of much assistance to you in the past _or_ here in the present.” Ford motioned to the men and women Kryptos had brought in while looking up at the Master. “They certainly didn’t help when I was making the portal.”

He felt a number of stares boring into him, but he kept his gaze on the Master as he waited for an answer, his tail twitching a bit under his coat.

 _“INTERESTING POINT, FORDSY. I KNEW I LET YOU PUPPETS KEEP YOUR KNOWLEDGE FOR A REASON. BUT YOU’RE MISSING SOMETHING HERE. THESE DEALS ARE GOING TO HELP ME NOW THAT I’M IN YOUR WORLD.”_ The Master’s eye gave the impression of a wicked grin. _“NOW THAT I’M HERE, I CAN REALLY MAKE SURE THAT THE HUMANS KNOW WHO’S BOSS._ ” He turned to look back at the humans. _“WHICH MEANS IT’S TIME TO MAKE THINGS TOPPLE. LET’S WATCH THOSE PUNY HUMANS SCRAMBLE AS THEY TRY TO PUT THEIR LIVES BACK TOGETHER AFTER THEY’VE BEEN TORN APART!”_

The various men and women in front of them exchanged looks at that, appearing uncertain.

“Are you really sure that’s the plan?” asked the man who had spoken first. “Because we could just as well turn the whole thing into a puppet government and—“

 _“OH, I’M SURE. SEE, MY WHOLE THING IS ABOUT CHAOS AND SPREADING IT. PUPPET ANYTHING IS NICE, BUT I DON’T WANT TO HAVE TO ORDER AN ENTIRE WORLD AROUND – I JUST CAME HERE TO LIBERATE THIS DIMENSION FROM EVERYTHING AND TURN IT INTO A NEVERENDING PARTY.”_ The Master inspected his fingers lazily, like he was inspecting nonexistent fingernails. _“SHOOT, I’D RATHER BE OUT THERE RIGHT NOW SETTING THINGS ON FIRE AND TURNING PEOPLE INSIDE OUT THAN TALKING WITH YOU.”_

The shocked gasps that the men and women let out at the Master’s comments told Ford rather clearly that they were starting to come to the same conclusions that he had thirty years ago – although, just like him, they were realizing the truth much too late.

“You…you mean you _aren’t_ going to make an empire across the universe?” the young man asked. “You’re not giving us a cut of the profits?”

“You promised me a high position!” the first man snapped. “If you break that part of the deal—“

_“OH, I WON’T, BELIEVE ME. YOU WANTED TO BE SOMEWHERE HIGH? HOW ABOUT THE STRATOSPHERE? I HOPE YOU CAN FLY LITTLE MAN!”_

The Master snapped his fingers, and the first of the tricked was gone.

The other members of the newly-betrayed group tried to scatter, but Kryptos flew after them, laughing as he snatched up each one of them and brought them back over to the Master, clinging to all of them like they were a collection of toy dolls that could be played with.

“Let us go!” one of them shouted.

 _“DO YOU REALLY THINK I’M GOING TO DO THAT WITHOUT FULFILLING MY END OF THE DEAL?”_ The Master’s voice sounded humored, but there were darker undertones to it. _“I HOPE YOU HAVEN’T FORGOTTEN WHAT YOU ASKED FOR, BECAUSE I HAVEN’T!”_

Ford’s face remained a mask as the Master went through each of the other deals that he’d made – one man wanted to see his family again, but he got a collection of zombies instead of actual people ( _“YOU NEVER SPECIFIED WHAT PART OF YOUR FAMILY!”_ ); a woman had shaken the Master’s hand because she’d wanted to know what love felt like ( _“YOU’RE GONNA LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT WEIRDMAGEDDON NOW, TOOTS! NOT TO MENTION EVERY SINGLE MALE ON THE FACE OF THIS PLANET.”)_

When the Master reached the last person, however – probably the youngest man in the group – he paused.

“Was I the only one of us who read _Faust_ when I was in school?” The man folded his arms across his chest and sent Ford a meaningful look. “And paid attention to what I was reading?”

Ford felt like he’d been hit in the gut, but his expression didn’t change. This was his fate now, unfortunate as it was, and it wasn’t going to change.

 _“OH, YEAH, YOU’RE THE GUY WHO AGONIZED OVER EVERY SINGLE WORD OF THE DEAL BEFORE YOU SHOOK MY HAND.”_ The Master rolled his eye. _“YOU PRETTY MUCH TOOK ALL THE FUN OUT OF MAKING THE DEAL, BUDDY.”_

“When your life’s on the line, fun isn’t something that you consider,” the man replied, folding his arms across his chest. “I’m not to be bothered by you after this, and I’m not going to get involved in anything that you might happen to be planning. I’ll set things in motion, but that’s it. We’re not going to interfere with each other other than that.”

 _“YEAH, YEAH, I REMEMBER.”_ The Master waved a hand, irritated. _“OKAY, KRYPTOS, TAKE HIM BACK TO WHERE YOU FOUND HIM.”_

“You got it!” Kryptos snatched up the man and slipped out of the throne room.

As soon as the geometric Henchmaniac was gone, the Master rubbed his hands together. _“NOW WE CAN TAKE THIS PARTY TO THE NEXT LEVEL! COME ON, FORDSY – LET’S SEE HOW MANY LANDMARKS THERE ARE THAT I CAN CHANGE TO MY IMAGE!”_ He snatched Ford up and warped out of the throne room, cackling as they reappeared over Mt. Rushmore. _“AND THIS LOOKS LIKE THE PERFECT PLACE TO START!”_

Ford watched as the Master snapped his fingers, turning the faces of the dead presidents into carvings of Bill with various expressions on his face. One ear twitched as he heard screaming below – there were people here despite the fact that the world was ending? They must have been in the area when Weirdmageddon hit the rest of the world.

He pitied them – for being placed in a situation where they would more than likely be unable to survive, for not expecting the apocalypse, and for not being able to adapt.

For being born in a world that his young, gullible self’s actions had caused the total destruction of.

He was certain that not very many people would come over to the Master’s side and adapt to his way of thinking. And that meant only one thing for them.

Death.

In a few minutes, the screams were silenced, and Bill cackled as he grabbed Ford and warped to the next landmark to defile.


	6. Family Ties

The Master carted Ford around for quite some time, defacing monuments and landmarks across the world and making sure that people knew who was now in control of what happened to their world. Introducing Ford as his pet and puppet and the one who brought him into the physical world in the first place happened often enough that by the end of it, Ford’s tail and ears didn’t so much as twitch at the glares and looks of shock he was receiving.

 _“MAN, THOSE CHURCH HUMANS REALLY NEED TO BE TAUGHT A LESSON IN HUMILITY,”_ the Master was saying as he warped out of Italy and back to the United States. _“I THINK PYRONICA WOULD LOVE TO BURN DOWN THAT VATICAN PLACE FOR LAUGHS. OR MAYBE PACIFIER COULD TAKE IT OUT!”_

Ford said nothing as they arrived in what appeared to be a suburban area. Several houses below them appeared to have been overtaken by nature, covered in vines and with trees growing through holes in the roofs. Square lots where foundations clearly used to be were scattered among them, small, neat balls of wood sitting perfectly in the center of each dirt square.

_“SO THIS IS THE KIDS’ NEIGHBORHOOD, HUH? I LIKE WHAT THEY’RE DOING WITH THE PLACE! THEY’RE CLEARLY GOING ALL OUT!”_

“It certainly does appear to be that way, Master,” Ford replied evenly.

A number of terrified screams rose up from below as the Master moved over the suburbs. Occasionally, he’d zap someone with a blast of energy or snap his fingers, turning them into various mutated monstrosities that sent the unaffected scattering with terrified screams.

Ford mentally blocked them out. It was starting to get easier to ignore them.

_“AHA! THERE THEY ARE!”_

The Master lowered himself down to what looked like a town square-like area, where a large oak tree had suddenly sprung up in a manner of seconds, leaves sparkling like they’d been covered in stardust. Dipper and Mabel were standing underneath it, hands on the trunk. Nearby stood a man and a woman, who were clearly terrified but didn’t look like they were going to run now – something besides their own terror seemed to be keeping them there.

Ford noticed that the couple seemed to share similar traits with Dipper and Mabel, and realized with a jolt that they were probably his great-niece’s and nephew’s parents.

The Master put Ford on the ground and nudged him over in Dipper’s and Mabel’s direction; Ford stumbled for only a moment before righting himself and walked with even strides over to them. He moved to stand behind them, hands on their shoulders, as he watched the Master shrink down to his original, smaller size and circle around Mabel’s and Dipper’s parents.

_“SO, THESE ARE THE MEATSACKS THAT BROUGHT PINE TREE AND SHOOTING STAR INTO EXISTENCE. I’M NOT IMPRESSED; I WAS EXPECTING SOMETHING…MORE.”_

The disapproving tone in the Master’s words made Ford’s ears flick back; he almost sounded like Filbrick.

“What are you supposed to be?” the man demanded. It was clear enough that this man was Shermie’s son – he had the distinct Pines chin, the stubborn glint in his eye, and had the broad shoulders that also ran through the family. “Some sort of geometric nightmare?”

 _“I LIKE FORDSY’S NAME BETTER – DREAM DEMON. HAS A LOT MORE OF AN OMINOUS TONE TO IT, DOESN’T IT?”_ The Master chuckled, sounding somewhat good-natured, but there was a dangerous undercurrent of the chaotic darkness the Master had in it as well.

“Wh-what do you want with our children?” the woman asked, concerned.

 _“THEY TRIED TO STOP ME! ‘SAVE THE WORLD’, I THINK A NUMBER OF THEM SAID! WELL, LOOK AT HOW THAT TURNED OUT! THANKS TO THEM, I WAS ABLE TO TAKE WEIRDMAGEDDON GLOBAL!”_ The Master motioned back to Ford, Dipper, and Mabel, causing Mr. and Mrs. Pines to stare at their children and their uncle with expressions of shock and horror. _“THEM TRYING AND FAILING TO STOP ME HAD TO BE THE BEST THING THAT’S HAPPENED TO ME IN A LONG TIME!”_

Ford’s left ear twitched as the couple stared at him and his niblings, but he kept his face a mask.

“Uncle Stanford, just what have you been up to in Gravity Falls?!” Mr. Pines demanded. “You promised that there wasn’t anything dangerous up there – you promised you’d keep an eye on them! For what reason did you decide to get them dragged…into some kind of _demon summoning?!_ ”

Ford didn’t answer, much less react. The Master let out a loud cackle of laughter.

_“OH, THIS IS RICH! YOU REALLY THINK THAT THIS MAN IS THE MAN YOU SENT THE KIDS TO? THIS IS ACTUALLY HIS TWIN BROTHER, WHO’S BEEN MISSING FOR THIRTY YEARS WHILE HIS IDIOT TWIN STANLEY’S BEEN PRETENDING TO BE HIM!”_

The parents looked startled at that, but Mr. Pines quickly shook it off. “That’s impossible! Uncle Stanley _died_ thirty years ago! He can’t have been—“

_“OH, IT’S POSSIBLE. WHY DON’T YOU TELL THEM WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU, FORDSY? AND SKIM OVER ‘THE OTHER SIDE OF THE PORTAL’ STUFF.”_

“Of course, Master.”

Dipper’s and Mabel’s parents recoiled at Ford’s reply, but they remained standing where they were as Ford explained where he’d been and what Stanley had been doing in the meantime – including Stanley’s faked death and the thirty years it took him to bring Ford back from the other side of the portal, while masquerading as his missing brother.

“Bringing me back resulted in the creation of a rift that, when it was released from containment, brought all this with it.” Ford motioned to the red sky above them as he finished. “We attempted to stop the Master while it was still contained within Gravity Falls, but we failed. And now—“

 _“THAT’S ENOUGH.”_ The Master waved a hand.

Ford shut his mouth and bowed his head.

 _“SO. NOW DO YOU SEE WHAT YOU’RE UP AGAINST?”_ The Master looked at Dipper’s and Mabel’s parents smugly, and he started to grow in size again.

“Kids, get over here,” their father ordered. “We’re going to get out of here and find somewhere safe and away from your great-uncle.”

Ford’s ears flicked back as his tail twitched under his coat. Dipper and Mabel didn’t move, but Ford felt their shoulders tighten under his hands.

“Dipper! Mabel!” Mr. Pines’ voice took on a barking tone that sounded more like his grandfather’s, making Ford actually wince a little. Still, the twins didn’t move.

The Master let out another cackle, now floating above their heads in the large form he’d had when he’d arrived in California. _“DO YOU REALLY THINK THEY’RE GOING TO LISTEN TO YOU? THEY’RE MINE NOW. THE ONLY REASON I’M PAYING ANY INTEREST IN YOU IS BECAUSE I WANTED TO KNOW WHERE PINE TREE AND SHOOTING STAR CAME FROM, WHICH DEFINITELY ISN’T QUITE WHAT I IMAGINED.”_ The Master waved a hand lazily. _“I MEAN, SERIOUSLY, THE KIDS’ GOTTA GET THEIR INHERENT MAGIC FROM SOMEWHERE, AND IT’S DEFINITELY NOT FROM YOU.”_

That was news to Ford. Inherent magic? His family had inherent magic that he hadn’t known about? Maybe that was why the spells he had found in Gravity Falls were so easy to use….

_“SO, THE MAGIC’S GOTTA COME FROM ELSEWHERE…FORDSY! WHERE WAS IT YOU SAID YOU WERE BORN AGAIN?”_

“Glass Shard Beach, New Jersey,” Ford answered automatically.

Dipper and Mabel looked up sharply at him at that.

 _“ALL RIGHT, THEN!”_ The Master snatched the three of them up and warped out of California, leaving the niblings’ parents staring after them with expressions of shock and horror.

Moments later, they were on a beach that, instead of sand, seemed to be made entirely of large glass shards.

 _“SEEMS THEY TAKE THE NAME LITERALLY HERE!_ ” The Master chuckled as he flew over the beach and started towards the already-burning city that was a short distance away. _“FORDSY, WHERE ARE WE GOING TO FIND YOUR PARENTS?”_

“I’m not sure, Master. It’s been well over forty years since I’ve last seen them. My guess would either be the pawn shop my father ran, a home where the elderly are cared for, or possibly the cemetery.”

_“IF THEY’RE DEAD, THEY’RE NOT GONNA BE HANGING AROUND THEIR BODIES. WHERE’S THE ‘PAWN SHOP’?”_

Ford gave directions that he’d memorized by heart decades ago, looking down and watching the streets below them, thinking of what the city had looked like back in the 1960s when he had been nothing more than a child.

_It’s incredible how much a world can change when you turn your back on it._

The Master landed in front of the pawn shop and dropped Ford, Dipper, and Mabel unceremoniously to the ground; the trio managed to land on their feet.

_“NOW. LET’S PAY YOUR OLD FOLKS A VISIT, SHALL WE, SIXER?”_

The Master shrank himself down again and started towards the beaten-in door of the pawn shop, which definitely looked like it’d seen better days in the decades that Ford had been gone. The building looked like it was ready to fall apart, but it still held itself together in a stubborn manner.

Almost like the entire place was still alive somehow.

The Master made a motion with one hand, pushing the door to one side. He looked back at Ford, Dipper, and Mabel, who hadn’t moved from where they’d hit the street. _“WELL? COME ON!”_

Ford quickly moved to follow after the Master, Dipper and Mabel trailing behind him.

The Master bobbed in approval, then motioned for them to step into the pawn shop ahead of him.

Ford wasn’t exactly sure what was going to greet them. Considering how horrible the pawn shop looked on the outside, he was expecting a similar ransacking on the inside.

What met his eyes was a pristine version of the pawn shop that he’d been familiar with when he’d been a boy. Just the sight of it alone wasn’t the same, either – the smell of smoke because of Ma’s and Pa’s habits hit his nose harder than he’d been expecting it to, and he winced as his nose reacted to the smell.

“Wel—“ A gruff voice suddenly cut itself off.

Ford looked over at the voice, covering his nose in order to try to prevent the acrid scent of the smoke from setting it off even more than it already had been. His eyes widened when he saw who was standing behind the counter, eyes staring at him from behind a pair of dark sunglasses.

“Stanford?” Filbrick Pines asked, shock in his voice.

Ford swallowed at the question.

 _“GO ON,”_ the Master said from behind him at a slightly lower volume than usual.

“H-hi, Dad,” Ford said carefully. His ears flicked back a little as his tail twitched nervously; it had been decades since he had last seen the man; why was it that he looked as he always had when he had been younger? “It’s…been a long time.”

“ _That’s_ your dad?” Dipper asked. “The guy who kicked Grunkle Stan out?”

Filbrick’s head turned sharply at that, and he leveled a disapproving glare at Dipper, actually causing the boy to flinch back a little. “Boys like you should respect your elders. The grown-ups are talking; go out and play with your friends or something.”

“Dipper and his twin sister Mabel are Sherman’s grandchildren,” Ford replied shortly, gripping Dipper’s and Mabel’s shoulders. “If you have anything to say to me, you can say it in their presence.”

“Sherman had grandchildren?!” came a muted woman’s voice with a heavy Jersey accent from the floor above. There came the sound of clattering footsteps, and a woman with black hair and wearing a red dress appeared on the stairs that led up to the second floor.

“Apparently,” Filbrick grunted. “More than can be said for the other two.” He looked at Ford with a brick-hard frown. “You were supposed to be our ticket out of this dump, and you leave us alone to rot after you graduate from your little college. And now you’re some kind of furry hippie.”

Ford knew where this conversation was going; his ears twitched irritably at the memory of many other conversations like it. The “furry hippie” was new, though. “The money I received was for research purposes _only,_ Dad. Grant money isn’t something that can be given freely, and I needed it.”

“What about Stanley?” Cassandra demanded from the stairs. “Ya could have done somethin’ ta help him, but no! He _died_ in a _car crash_ when he could ‘ave been home – safe – and with a steady job!” She started forward, stepping off the last stair and onto the pawn shop’s main floor, then stopped short. “Wait…Dipper, was it? Ya said ya had a ‘Grunkle Stan’?”

Dipper nodded. “Yeah. Stanley. He’s still alive.”

“He just faked his death by car crash to fool everybody, that’s all,” Mabel added.

Cassandra looked relieved for a moment, then frowned. “Somethin’ ain’ right here.”

“I’ll say,” Filbrick said. “First our family’s dressed up like some group of hippies, and next they say that no-good son of mine is still alive?”

“Not that, you ignoramus!” Cassandra bared back in response with a flare of anger. “Don’t ya see it?! They’ve been tainted by a demon!”

Ford’s eyes widened sharply at that. “How did you—“

 _“LOOKS LIKE I’VE FOUND THE MISSING LINK!_ ”

The Master appeared suddenly in the middle of the pawn shop, causing Filbrick to turn his head sharply to glare at him.

_“I WAS WONDERING IF THERE WAS A DESCENDANT OF THE ORIGINAL ZODIAC HANGING AROUND IN THIS FAMILY SOMEWHERE! LOOKS LIKE I WAS RIGHT!”_

This was news to Ford. “What are you—“

 _“AH AH AH! THE GROWN-UPS ARE TALKING NOW, FORDSY._ ”

Ford cut himself off with a wince, causing Cassandra to look at him with alarm before she quickly returned her attention to the Master.

“Who are you?!” Cassandra demanded. “What manner a’ monster are ya?!”

 _“THE NAME’S BILL CIPHER.”_ The Master tipped his hat, causing the entire room to tip backwards. Ford, not having expected gravity to shift like that outside of the mindscape, fell back and landed on his tail, causing a wave of pain to shoot up his spine as Dipper and Mabel stumbled. He quickly pulled his tail out from under him and rose to his feet again, noting that Filbrick had clung to the counter of the checkout and Cassandra had grabbed the stair railing behind her. _“I’M THE GUY WHO’S GOT CONTROL OF YOUR KIDS’ LIVES NOW!”_

“Release my boys!” Cassandra demanded. Her hair started to move, waving in a non-existent wind as the air in the pawn shop slowly started to grow colder. “You have no right—“

 _“NO RIGHT? NO RIGHT??”_ The Master let out a short laugh. _“YOUR ‘BOYS’ ARE A PART OF MY ZODIAC, AND THEY FAILED, SO I GET TO DO WHAT I WANT WITH THEM! YOUR GREAT-GRANDKIDS TOO, BY THE WAY.”_

Cassandra looked between the Master and Ford, whose drooping ears were the only sign that he was at all unhappy about their present situation. “Is he tellin’ the truth, Stanford? Come on, son, answer me!”

“Answer your mother, boy!” Filbrick snapped.

Ford’s ears flicked back at his father’s voice, but the Master hadn’t given him permission to speak, so he set his jaw instead.

Dipper shivered as the air in the shop continued to grow colder. The wind whistled through his antlers in such a way that it created a rather eerie sound, like a ghost’s moaning.

 _“YOU’RE NOT GONNA GET AN ANSWER OUT OF HIM UNLESS I SAY HE CAN! ISN’T THAT RIGHT, FORDSY?_ ”

Ford bowed his head. “Yes, Master.”

Cassandra sucked in a breath sharply. Filbrick’s face started to turn red from anger.

“You _dare_ to think you can order _my_ son around?!” Filbrick moved around the counter and charged at the demon, thrusting a fist forward in an attempt to punch the Master in the eye.

Bill forced Filbrick back with a blast of blue fire, sending him slamming against one of the jewelry cases and causing the chains and necklaces within them to suddenly grow in size and wrap themselves around Filbrick, keeping him pinned.

The wind whipped up suddenly, creating a miniature cyclone inside the pawn shop. Mabel pulled her wings in as best she could while Ford gripped her and Dipper’s shoulders.

**“You will set my family free and leave us alone!”**

Ford’s gaze moved to Cassandra, and his eyes widened in shock when he saw that she was covered in bright white flames that didn’t harm the wooden floor under her feet or the other flammable objects around her.

 _“IF I WAS TO DO THAT, MIND EYE, I WOULD NEED A TRADE.”_ The Master looked Cassandra up and down, unfazed by the wind storm and dropping temperature. _“AND IN ORDER FOR THE TRADE TO BE EVEN, IT WOULD HAVE TO BE YOU FOR…WELL, JUST FORDSY AND FEZ. AND BESIDES, YOU’RE PRETTY MUCH NOTHING MORE THAN A SOUL NOW, AND I KINDA NEED YOUR SOUL TO HAVE A VESSEL IF YOU’RE GONNA SERVE ME FOR THE REST OF ETERNITY. YOU’D BE A BIT TOO UNSTABLE OTHERWISE.”_

Ford’s ears drooped at the Master’s words, but the storm and Cassandra’s fire didn’t lessen. If anything, they only started to become stronger, causing the objects in the pawn shop to start to get blown around in the wind, breaking display cases and windows and hitting against Ford and the niblings, but not doing enough damage to make them bleed.

“Hey! Easy with the merchandise!” It was obvious that Filbrick didn’t completely understand what was going on.

 **“Shut it!”** Cassandra barked back. She glared at the Master, her eyes glowing with energy.

The two of them kept up the staring contest for a while longer before the wind storm slowly abated, and the glow left Cassandra’s eyes. The cold and the fire remained, however.

“I want ta talk to my son,” Cassandra said in a serious tone. There was still a reverb of power in her voice, but there wasn’t as much as there had been before. “Alone.”

The Master considered the question, tapping the bricks below his eye in a thoughtful manner as he looked back at his puppets. _“YOU’RE NOT GONNA TRY ANYTHING FUNNY, ARE YOU? BECAUSE IF YOU ARE, I’M GOING TO EAT YOUR SOUL. IT’S BEEN A WHILE SINCE I LAST HAD ONE, AND I’VE GOT A REAL HANKERING FOR SOMETHING POWERFUL.”_

Ford’s tail lashed once at the thought of the Master eating someone’s soul, but his face revealed nothing of what he thought. He couldn’t stop the Master, after all, but the thought of losing his mother to the demon made him angered and horrified.

Cassandra glared at the Master with the ferocity of a mother bear. “You said it yerself – I’m a spirit. Do you _really_ think I can do anything?” She spat out her words with venom, looking disgusted with what she was saying as much as she was disgusted with their present situation.

 _“GOOD POINT. I’M GLAD YOU REMEMBERED THAT!”_ The Master turned and gave Ford a look. _“I’M GIVING YOU TWO FIVE MINUTES.”_

Ford nodded, then slipped past Dipper and Mabel and walked over Cassandra. The Master drifted away, suddenly looking very interested in the tied-down Filbrick.

“Oh Stanford.” Cassandra looked up at Ford with a sorrowful expression. “How did you get yourself mixed up in this?”

“I may have…summoned him over thirty years ago,” Ford admitted. Seeing Cassandra raise a hand, he added quickly, “He said he was a muse!”

Cassandra slapped him across the face; it stung more than Ford had been expecting, and he winced. “You idiot! You don’t trust things that have to be summoned with summoning circles! No wonder the demon’s taint is stronger on ya than on those kids!” She shook her head, tears coming to her eyes. “What have you been up to, Stanford? And what about Stanley?”

Ford looked away. “The Master directed me to create a portal – a gateway to gain more knowledge, he’d said. When I discovered what was on the other side, I attempted to shut it down and keep anyone from activating it again. I called Stanley in order to get his help. Unfortunately, we fought, and I ended up going through the portal. Stanley took my place in Gravity Falls while he tried to find a way to bring me back. It took him thirty years…and it brought about the end of the world as we know it. We attempted to stop the Master while he was still confined in Gravity Falls, but…” He sighed, ears drooping as he bowed his head in sorrow. “Stanley, Dipper, and Mabel share in my fate.”

“Stanford.” Cassandra’s gentle touch of her hand against his cheek – most likely meant to be a comforting gesture – felt like it was burning and freezing at the same time as she brought his gaze back to her. “This has to be the stupidest thing you kids have ever done. What were you thinking?”

“For once in my life, I…most likely wasn’t.”

Cassandra gave a weak smile at that, but it turned into a frown moments later. “Stanford, ya should have known better than to do that. You’ve got a good head on your shoulders.”

Ford sighed.

“An’ you’ll science your way out of this, I know—“

“There’s no point in me trying that, Mom.”

Cassandra blinked at Ford’s defeated tone, then frowned. “What do ya mean, Stanford?”

“Even if I were to find a way to free us, I wouldn’t be able to make use of it unless someone else came up with the same solution and managed to follow through. I can’t go against anything the Master orders – none of us can.” Ford sighed again, closing his eyes and bowing his head. “He is holding our very souls captive to his whims. There’s nothing we can do.”

Cassandra stared at her son for a moment, then pulled her hand back from his face. “Stanford—“

 _“TIME’S UP!_ ” The Master popped in between the two of them suddenly, cutting Cassandra off. _“TIME TO TAKE YOU BACK TO THE FEARAMID, FORDSY! I’M GETTING TIRED OF HAVING TO LUG YOU ALL OVER THE PLACE. OH! AND BEFORE WE GO – I’M GONNA MAKE SURE THAT YOU DON’T TRY ANYTHING.”_ He gave Cassandra a pointed look as a leash connected to Ford’s collar materialized in his hand. _“THAT HUSBAND OF YOURS? BRICK FACE?”_

Cassandra’s eyes widened sharply as her face paled.

 _“POOF!_ ”

The Master pointed over at Filbrick and sent a blast of energy at the man, causing him to glow a bright white before exploding into multiple, glowing particles, which faded from existence moments later.

 _“THERE! OFF TO THE AFTERLIFE WHERE HE’S NEVER GONNA SEE HIS KIDS EVER AGAIN!”_ The Master blew the smoke off his fingertip. _“IF YOU WANNA STICK AROUND, DON’T GET IN MY WAY. GOT IT, MIND EYE?”_

Cassandra sent Ford a wide-eyed look, and he looked back at her with a saddened expression. She huffed. “All right, fine. But if you do anything to my sons that threatens their lives, I _am_ going to make you regret it.”

The Master let out an amused snort. “ _PINE TREE, SHOOTING STAR – GO WILD ON THIS TOWN AND MOVE ON WHEN YOU’VE CAUSED MORE THAN ENOUGH CHAOS TO TURN EVERYONE ON THEIR HEADS! IF THEY HAVE HEADS WHEN YOU’RE DONE, THAT IS!_ ”

“Yes, Master,” Dipper and Mabel answered in unhappy unison.

The Master snapped his fingers, and he and Ford were instantly teleported back to the Fearamid’s throne room.

 _“STAY HERE LIKE A GOOD PET AND WAIT FOR ME TO COME BACK.”_ The Master wrapped the end of the leash around the outstretched hand of one of the turned-to-stone Gravity Falls residents in his throne as he directed Ford to sit down in front of it. _“IT’S TIME THAT I HAD SOME REAL FUN!”_

The Master promptly teleported out of the throne room, leaving Ford alone.

Ford bowed his head and sighed, feeling the pull of the leash against his neck. Was that all he was now? A pet?

Well, if that was to be his fate….


	7. Publicity Stunt

Ford wasn’t sure how long he had been sitting in front of the Master’s throne when He returned, laughing loud enough that he probably would have cringed from the sound if his ears hadn’t been looking for it.

 _“HEY-O, FORDSY! I BROUGHT FEZ BACK! SEEMS HE WASN’T ABLE TO GET TOO FAR WITH THE WHOLE GOVERNMENT THING, BUT HEY! THEY’RE ALL COLLAPSED ANYWAY, SO WHO CARES?_ ”

Ford opened his eyes and looked up as the Master placed Stan – now back in his original, familiar form – to his left in a kneeling position. While he was curious about what exactly had happened, he wasn’t allowed to voice his questions, so he remained silent.

 _“I’M GONNA HAVE TO SEND NO HUMOR BACK, THOUGH – I CHECKED IN ON THE GUY AND MAN, DOES HE LOOK LIKE HE’S IN THE MOOD TO GET OTHER PEOPLE LAUGHING JUST LIKE HIM! HE’S GOT HIMSELF ALL DECKED OUT LIKE HE’S SOME KIND OF SUIT-WEARING CLOWN. I THINK THE PEOPLE’LL LIKE HIM!”_ The Master snapped his fingers, and a figure in a bright purple suit with _green_ hair appeared in his hand.

Ford’s eyes widened slightly when he realized that the cackling man in the Master’s hand was, in fact, the other agent who had attempted to find the Master’s weakness – Powers, he recalled. Was giving him a sense of humor really that detrimental to his mental health?

Stan winced next to him, but said nothing.

 _“TIME TO LET YOU LOOSE ON THE WORLD!_ ” The Master snapped His fingers again, and Powers’ cackling stopped abruptly, leaving the Fearamid strangely quiet compared to the noise level that Powers had been letting out. _“OKAY. NOW, LET’S SEE – GOVERNMENT’S COLLAPSED, I’VE LIBERATED THIS WORLD AND IT’S STARTING TO SPREAD ACROSS THE UNIVERSE – THAT’S GOING TO TAKE SOME TIME; ANTI-MATTER’S GOING TO CAUSE SOME ISSUES…AND I THINK I’D LIKE TO SEE IF THERE’S ANYTHING THAT I CAN DO TO GET SOME PROPER FOLLOWERS AROUND HERE. ANY IDEAS, YOU TWO?”_

“Television,” Stan responded instantly.

Ford looked at his brother with some surprise at that.

_“YOU MEAN THOSE LITTLE ELECTRONIC BOX THINGS?”_

“Yes, Master.” Stan’s voice came out as a growl. “They’re practically glued to ‘em. Radio, too.”

The Master hummed thoughtfully. _“INTERESTING. PERHAPS YOU HUMANS HAVE SOMETHING THAT CAN BE USEFUL TO ME AFTER ALL. HOW DO WE GET THE MOST ATTENTION?”_

“Press conference?” Stan shrugged. “It’s what those government leeches did, at any rate.”

 _“I LIKE IT!”_ The Master practically thrummed with approval. _“YOU AND THE KIDS – FIND A WAY TO GET THEIR ATTENTION AND BRING AS MANY PEOPLE AS YOU CAN INTO ONE PLACE – RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY FEARAMID. WHY NOT IN THAT STUPID TOWN WHERE IT ALL STARTED? AND MAKE SURE THEY BRING WHAT THEY NEED IN ORDER TO SPREAD THE NEWS ABOUT ME AS FAR AS POSSIBLE – I WANT TO SEE IF I CAN FIND SOME PROPER PARTIERS IN THIS DIMENSION!”_

Ford and Stan bowed their heads. “Yes, Master.”

**Time Break**

Finding the television studios was the easy part. Finding reporters and working cameras that could actually document the Master’s “press conference”? That was a little more difficult, but they managed to find some hidden among the skeleton crews that were left behind to man the studios in California when everyone else had fled for what probably counted as shelter to them.

Actually getting them _out_ to Gravity Falls required the entire family practically dragging the reporters and cameramen there themselves – literally, in Dipper’s case, by making use of the vines that he was able to grow practically out of nowhere. Ford, Stan, and Mabel made use of threats instead, demonstrating their abilities on nearby objects – or people who had been hiding nearby, in Stan’s case.

“Man, if the rest of the world is going to be hit as bad as this place was, I’m more than a little concerned about what that triangle guy has in mind,” remarked the driver of the van Ford was sitting in.

Ford watched the red wasteland pass by outside impassively. The rest of the world certainly didn’t look this bad yet – the road had stopped rather abruptly as soon as they had crossed over into the valley, along with the trees – but he knew that it was only a matter of time before the entire world reached that point, on account of the chaos that Bill brought with him.

The driver – a skinny young man who gave the deceiving impression that he couldn’t lift twice his own weight – drummed his fingers against the wheel nervously. “W-we just need to get up to that pyramid thing up there, right?”

“Right.” Ford’s answer was short and terse. He eyed the van that was ahead of them, watching the greenery that seemed to be merging with the metal of the vehicle – an added effect of Dipper’s powers pulling the van along ahead of them. He was the one leading their little caravan, and Stan was the one bringing up the rear – mostly because he’d be able to see if anyone tried to turn and flee.

Dipper ended up being the one who directed the caravan to come to a stop by reaching what used to be part of the town, if the ruins that were scattered around the area were of any indication of what it might have been.

The driver stopped the camera van as the other vans moved up to make a half-circle around the remains of a melted statue. He sat still for only a moment, looking more and more jittery by the second, before squeezing his eyes shut and forcing himself to get out of the driver’s seat and into the wasteland that had once been Oregon woods.

Ford stepped wordlessly out of the van and moved to join Dipper, Mabel, and Stan as they got out of their respective vehicles and over to the melted base of the statue. His tail shifted and twisted in order to work out the kinks that had settled in during the drive.

Ford made a mental note that sitting down in a chair without some kind of hole in the back was going to be very uncomfortable for him in the future, then prepared himself to wait for the Master’s inevitable appearance.

It didn’t take the Master long to make himself known.

Ford watched the reporters’ reactions as they finally activated their cameras and looked up, only to balk when a now-familiar presence came down from the Fearamid behind them.

 _“THIS IS ALL YOU COULD GET?”_ The Master sounded disapproving. _“I WAS EXPECTING A LITTLE MORE THAN THIS.”_

“Well, most of us _are_ trying to survive rather than continue our jobs,” responded one of the reporters – a woman wearing a blouse and jeans, clearly not having been expecting to be dragged out of the studio for an interview with the dream demon. “What you see is what you get – I bet that New York doesn’t even have _their_ studios running anymore.”

 _“HMPH. WELL THEN, THIS THING HAD BETTER BROADCAST ON EVERY ONE OF THOSE ELECTRIC BOXES FROM HERE TO THE ENDS OF THIS WORLD, BECAUSE I DON’T PLAN TO REPEAT MYSELF.”_ The Master snapped his fingers, causing the satellite dishes on the tops of the vans to start glowing with an aura of blue, sparking energy. _“I HOPE YOU MEATSACKS ARE READY, BECAUSE I DON’T PLAN ON REPEATING MYSELF TWICE!”_

“A-ah…right.” The reporter woman looked at the other people who had been assembled, meeting the eyes of various men and women as they gave her thumbs-up in response. Then she nodded and looked back up at the Master. “What exactly is your name, anyway? Your…servants were less than helpful in answering our questions on the way here.”

Ford noticed her gaze go to him, and one of the cameras turned in their direction.

_“I ONLY SENT THEM TO FIND YOU; I DIDN’T SEND THEM TO ANSWER QUESTIONS. AS FOR WHO I AM – I’M BILL CIPHER, YOUR NEW LORD AND MASTER FOR ALL ETERNITY! IT SHOULD BE EASY ENOUGH FOR YOU MEATBAGS TO GRASP.”_

The reporters and cameramen exchanged unnerved expressions at that.

“Ah…I see.” A young male reporter in a suit – clearly, he _had_ been expecting to go on camera, just not like this – cleared his throat. “We were told that you had a message you wanted spread? Is that right?”

 _“YES, THAT’S RIGHT!”_ The Master summoned his cane and twirled it around in one hand lazily, which at his presently monstrous size made it look like he was swinging around a tall, thin tree trunk, which only made the reporters more nervous. _“YOU SEE, I’M DISAPPOINTED THAT THERE AREN’T VERY MANY OF YOU WHO ARE ACTUALLY FOLLOWING THE LEAD OF MY HENCHMANIACS AND PARTYING. PART OF THE REASON I CAME TO THIS DIMENSION WAS SO THAT I COULD LIBERATE THIS ONE OF ALL THE RULES YOU MEATSACKS HAD TO FOLLOW. YOU SHOULD BE CELEBRATING, NOT PANICKING LIKE THE ONE-LIFE-SPAN LOSERS YOU ARE.”_

“Our definition of ‘partying’ is a lot different from yours,” the woman reporter spoke up again. “And it’s a lot more _tame_ in comparison. I doubt that you’re going to be able to find anyone here who is going to join you.”

 _“THAT’S YOUR OPINION! THERE’S PROBABLY A FEW MEMBERS OF YOUR SPECIES WHO WOULD BE MORE THAN WILLING TO SIDE WITH ME – IF THEY CAN MAKE IT HERE, THAT IS.”_ The Master’s eye crinkled up into a smile. _“CONSIDER IT YOUR INITIATION TEST – MAKE YOUR WAY UP HERE TO MY FEARAMID AND FIND A WAY IN. WHOEVER GETS UP HERE AND SWEARS FEALTY TO ME IN FRONT OF ME OR ONE OF MY PUPPETS GETS TO JOIN THE HENCHMANIACS! I’LL EVEN LET YOU PICK YOUR OWN POWERS TO USE!”_

The group exchanged looks again while Ford’s mind turned over the offer that the Master was throwing out in the open. It was obvious that there had to be a catch to this – the Master wasn’t one to just give something away so easily.

“What about them?” the male reporter pointed towards Ford and the others with his microphone. “Are they willing ‘partygoers’?”

The Master burst out laughing. _“NOPE! THEY’RE MY PUPPETS – WELL, FORDSY IS MORE OF A PET THAN A PUPPET, BUT WHO REALLY CARES ABOUT TERMINOLOGY LIKE THAT AT A PARTY, HUH?”_ He waved his cane around lazily. _“YOU’LL SEE THEM AROUND HERE AND THERE IF I NEED ANYTHING ENTERTAINING. THEY’LL ONLY LISTEN TO ME, THOUGH, SO IF YOU TRY TO GET ANYTHING OUT OF THEM WITHOUT ME GIVING THEM PERMISSION, I CAN TELL YOU THAT IT’S NOT GOING TO WORK!”_

The Master moved out of Ford’s line of sight for a moment, only to reappear again in his smaller form, hovering over his left shoulder. He put a hand on Ford’s head – right between his ears – and started scratching in an almost absentminded manner.

The female reporter cleared her throat again. “Is there going to be any sort of catch to these super abilities that you’re proposing to give to anyone who manages to reach you here?”

Ford’s right ear twitched at the question, and the Master paused in his scratching.

 _“CATCH?”_ The Master chuckled. _“YOU’LL ONLY HAVE TO BE A PART OF MY HENCHMANIACS FOR THE REST OF ETERNITY! TRY TO LEAVE THE PARTY AND DO ANYTHING TO REVERSE WHAT I’VE DONE, AND I’LL MAKE SURE THAT YOU PAY IN FULL FOR GOING AGAINST ME. I HAD A WHOLE TORTURE LINE-UP FOR FORDSY HERE UNTIL I PRESSED HIM INTO SERVICE – I COULD MOVE THAT TO WHOEVER DECIDES TO GO BACK ON THEIR DEAL WITH ME._ ”

Ford’s tail twitched at the Master’s choice of wording. He was deliberately avoiding saying what exactly it was that he’d done – why? Was he going to keep the exact process a secret from others in case they intended to copy him?

 _“ANY OTHER POSSIBLY ANNOYING QUESTIONS FOR ME?”_ The Master sounded a tad annoyed himself. _“BECAUSE OTHERWISE YOU’RE DONE HERE.”_

The reporters exchanged looks at that, appearing uncertain at the Master’s comment.

“One last question.” The female reporter stepped forward. “If anyone were to join you to, say, discover if you had a weakness and if you could possibly be defeated—“

The Master burst out laughing. _“WEAKNESS? LIKE THEY’D EVER BE ABLE TO FIND THAT! IT’D BE A REAL HOOT IF THEY TRIED, BUT I’VE ALREADY HAD PEOPLE ATTEMPT IT AND FAIL. SO IF YOU REALLY WANT TO TRY TO TAKE ME OUT, GO AHEAD – GIVE ME YOUR BEST SHOT! I COULD GO FOR SOME ENTERTAINMENT AROUND HERE, AND I’M SURE MY HENCHMANIACS WOULD, TOO! I DOUBT YOU’RE GOING TO BE AS GOOD AS THE FIRST ATTEMPT, THOUGH – I MEAN, A GIANT ROBOT THAT USED TO BE A HOUSE? HOW MANY OF YOU MEATSACKS ARE GOING TO BE ABLE TO TOP THAT, HUH?”_

As the Master broke out into another round of laughter, Ford caught sight of something flashing in the eyes of one or two of the reporters and their cameramen. It took him a moment to remember what exact word best described the reaction he was seeing.

_Determination._

Ford felt an aching twinge in his chest and pushed the word out of his mind quickly.

 _“WELL, I’M STARTING TO FEEL LIKE YOU’RE OVERSTAYING YOUR WELCOME.”_ The Master’s voice took on a more serious tone. _“GO ON, GET OUT OF HERE – GO HIDE IF YOU WANT. SEE IF I CARE.”_ He made a dismissive motion with the hand holding his cane – which had shrunk down with him – and went right back to scratching Ford’s head.

It felt…strange, to have the Master petting him like one would a normal animal. But the Master had said that Ford was essentially a pet to him, so Ford came to the conclusion that it was probably something that he was going to have to get used to.

Still, he couldn’t help but feel unnerved by the feeling that was bubbling up inside him, telling him to lean against the hand to get the fingers to go a little deeper, to relax and just let the Master continue to do what he was doing.

In the meantime, the reporters and cameramen they’d brought up from California were scrambling to pack up their equipment and move out of the area as quickly as they could, barking orders at each other to get moving before “the triangle eldritch abomination decides to get any ideas and kills us for not getting out of his sight fast enough.”

As Ford felt his shoulders relax – his more animalistic instincts taking hold as the Master continued to scratch – he noticed that one of the cameramen kept looking rather calmly in their direction. He certainly didn’t seem to be terrified by the possibility that he could be killed by the Master or any one of Ford’s family, and there was something about the way that he threw his camera into the back of one of the vans that almost suggested he didn’t really care for their present situation very much.

Ford learned why as everyone except for the cameraman – a young man who certainly had some visible muscle – walked towards them instead of climbing into the back of the van.

“Kevin, what do you think you’re doing?!” barked the skinny driver that Ford had sat next to on the way up to Gravity Falls.

“I’m going to join them,” the boy – Kevin, apparently – replied without looking back. His voice was unusually calm, considering who it was that he was moving towards. He stopped about a foot and a half in front of Ford and the Master before dropping down on one knee, bowing his head. “My life is yours.”

Ford was horrified. This young man – probably only just having gotten out of college – was willing to turn his entire _life_ over to the Master? If the boy had a proper head on his shoulders, he would have turned and run with his crew instead of doing this!

He kept these thoughts to himself, however, simply eyeing the young man as the Master stopped scratching Ford’s head and looked at the human with an expression of minor interest. Ford was trapped in his fate – there was nothing he could do to possibly convince the young man in front of him to rethink his decision.

 _“WELL, THIS IS CERTAINLY AN INTERESTING TURN,”_ the Master remarked. _“I WASN’T EXPECTING A FOLLOWER SO SOON! SINCE MY PUPPETS BROUGHT YOU TO ME, I’LL LET THE FACT THAT YOU DIDN’T HUNT THIS PLACE DOWN ON YOUR OWN SLIDE. DON’T THINK THAT EVERYTHING’S GOING TO BE THIS EASY, HOWEVER! YA GOT A POWER IN MIND?”_

Kevin looked up at Bill with an almost bloodthirsty gaze in his eyes. “Control over lightning.”

 _“NICE CHOICE! DON’T HAVE ONE OF THOSE YET – AND PYRONICA’S GONNA HAVE ANOTHER ELEMENTAL TO PLAY WITH.”_ The Master’s eye shone with pleasure, and he snapped his fingers.

A bolt of blue-purple lightning suddenly blasted down from above, striking Kevin in the head. He screamed as the energy coursed into his body, causing his appearance to change into something far more demonic and monstrous: horns and a long tail that were jagged like the very lightning he’d been struck with, light purple skin, and clawed hands and feet that tore Kevin’s shoes apart.

The boy’s scream turned into crazed laughter as the lightning faded, and he rose to his feet and looked himself over with an eager, fanged grin. “This is incredible.”

 _“NOW, GO OUT AND SPREAD THE PARTY!_ ” The Master declared. _“AND IF ANY OF YOUR FRIENDS ASK, TELL ‘EM TO COME UP HERE AND PAY ME A VISIT!”_

“Yes, sir!” Kevin gave Bill a salute, then turned to look at the vans that he had originally come to Gravity Falls with, now driving down the road and into the distance as fast as they could possibly go. He crouched down for a moment then with a crackle of thunder that caused Ford and the others to flinch the human-turned-lightning demon leapt high into the air after the camera vans.

 _“NOW, SEE, THERE’S A MEATSACK WHO KNOWS HOW TO HAVE FUN.”_ The Master chuckled. He snapped his fingers, warping the group inside the Fearamid and in front of his throne – Ford and Dipper to the right, and Stan and Mabel to the left. _“I’LL LEAVE YOU HERE FOR A BIT. TAKE A NAP OR SOMETHING, AND LET ME KNOW IF ANYONE SHOWS UP SWEARING FEALTY TO ME!”_

The Master disappeared again in a flash of blue energy, leaving his puppets kneeling in front of his throne in silence.


	8. Bishop

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you are in any way religious and have had people stereotype you as a religious fanatic, BE WARNED: Bishop is NOT someone you want to emulate. He's...well, he's someone who's taken religion to the extreme by worshipping Cipher himself. You'll get to meet him in a bit.

_“Hey!”_

Ford’s ears twitched at the voice – a young woman’s by the sound of it.

 _“Where’s your boss?”_ the woman’s voice continued. _“I want to talk to him about that swearing fealty thing.”_

Ah.

Ford opened his eyes and looked up, catching sight of a young, athletic woman standing at the other side of the throne room with her hands on her hips. “The Master is out at present. If you wish to speak with him, you will have to be patient and wait for his return.”

The woman huffed at that, looking annoyed. _“Well._ I should think that his servants would know how to get into contact with him if someone is looking for him! Didn’t you have _any_ way to stay in contact with him before you got him here in order to get orders from him?”

Ford’s ears flicked back at the question while Stan and the others winced. “There was a way to contact the Master, yes, but I doubt it’s a viable way anymore, given that he has a physical form here and doesn’t exist solely in the mindscape. I doubt the Master would take _kindly_ to a summoning.”

The woman considered that for a moment, then nodded. “I guess that makes sense. All right. I’ll wait. Any idea when he’ll be back?”

There came a bright flash from above their heads, and the Master re-entered his throne room. _“WELL, CONSIDERING THAT TIME DOESN’T EXIST, I’D SAY FOREVER AND NOW!”_

Ford’s ears went straight up as his gaze moved to the Master while the woman looked startled at his sudden appearance. She recovered her composure a moment later and slammed her clenched right fist into her ribcage over her heart. Then she started saying –possibly reciting – her version of a fealty swear to the Master.

It was hard to tell how many times this had happened now; Ford had never bothered to count and he wasn’t about to start. He did note, however, that this was the first woman who had managed to make it to the Fearamid on her own, then filed the thought away to never make note of it again.

The woman’s scream turned into a crazed laugh as she was transformed into a bright green demoness in a translucent dress, with a shapely form and three eyes. She looked over her clawed fingers, grinning wickedly. “This is everything and more than I imagined.”

 _“REMEMBER – YOU’RE WITH ME FOR THE REST OF YOUR NOW ETERNAL LIFE!”_ the Master chirped. _“NOW, BE A GOOD GIRL AND GO OFF AND FIND PYRONICA OR SOMEONE – HAVE THEM SHOW YOU THE ROPES!”_

The human-turned-demoness cackled in response, then disappeared in a wash of green flames.

 _“GREEK FIRE, HUH? I THINK THOSE TWO WILL GET ALONG GREAT.”_ The Master snickered darkly, as though imagining what sort of chaos his new follower would cause in the near future. _“YOU’RE RIGHT ABOUT THE SUMMONING BIT BY THE WAY, FORDSY. I KNEW I HAD THE RIGHT IDEA IN LETTING YOU KEEP YOUR KNOWLEDGE!”_

Ford bowed his head in response.

 _“ALL RIGHT.”_ The Master rubbed his hands together as Ford looked up again. _“WE’RE GONNA HAVE A COUPLE GUESTS POPPING IN SOON, AND I’VE GOT SOME CHORES FOR YOU TO TAKE CARE OF. FEZ, THERE’S A COUPLE MORONS OUT THERE WHO ARE TRYING TO STAGE A REBELLION AGAINST ME – GO AND INFILTRATE THEM, AND TEAR THEM APART ON MY SIGNAL.”_

“Understood, Master,” Stan replied. There was a gruff growl to his voice.

The Master snapped his fingers, and Stan was gone in a flash of blue flames.

_“PINE TREE, SHOOTING STAR – GO OUT AND CAUSE A LITTLE MORE CHAOS FOR ME, WILL YA? AND DON’T BE AFRAID TO SHOW OFF – I WANT TO SEE HOW MANY MORE PEOPLE ACTUALLY WANT TO JOIN UP, IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.”_

“Yes, Master,” Dipper and Mabel chorused. There was another flash of blue, and they too were gone.

The Master then turned his attention to Ford with an almost thoughtful expression, rubbing one hand under his eye and above his bowtie like a human would rub their chin. Ford wondered if he was considering sending him out to blow something up or go after a group of humans, but he doubted that was going to be the case.

His tail twitched as a throbbing sensation started at the tip. Ford ignored it; he had felt worse pain, even though the pain was coming from an appendage he hadn’t had for long.

The Master’s eye moved slightly at the motion. _“HMM? OH, THAT’S INTERESTING.”_ His eye crinkled up in an expression of amusement. _“I THOUGHT I’D HAVE TO WAIT A LITTLE LONGER BEFORE THAT STARTED! THIS’LL MAKE AN EXCELLENT SHOW FOR OUR GUESTS!”_

Ford’s ears drooped a little at that; apparently, _his_ role was going to be entertainment.

 _“NOW, THEY SHOULD BE GETTING HERE ANY MINUTE NOW.”_ The Master settled down on his throne and rested his elbows on the armrests, steepling his fingers together in an almost impatient manner.

Ford simply bowed his head and closed his eyes, settling into a light sleep. He doubted he would be able to get much of that when the Master’s guests arrived.

There came the sound of a blast of magic and flames a moment later – how Ford had known it was magic, he wasn’t sure – and then someone spoke.

“AND HERE WE ARE!”

Ford’s ears went straight up at the voice. It was the Master’s, but at the same time it wasn’t – there was a different kind of reverb of power to it, a different kind of echo that surprised him.

“Incredible! I was never aware that there were more than one of you, Lord Cipher!”

The _second_ voice, however, _really_ came as a shock.

Ford’s slightly throbbing tail stiffened suddenly. He hadn’t just spoken, but it _sounded_ like he had. That, and the fact that the voice had said _“Lord_ Cipher,” quickly led Ford to a conclusion that filled him with dread.

 _“YOU WEREN’T AWARE?”_ the Master repeated. _“MY MY, YOU’RE REALLY UNINFORMED, AREN’T YOU? DON’T YOU FORDS KNOW HOW THE MULTIVERSE WORKS? MUTLIPLE VERSIONS OF THE SAME PERSON CAN EXIST AT THE SAME TIME!”_

“AND THAT INCLUDES HANDSOME DEITIES SUCH AS MYSELF,” the other added.

“Ah, I understand! Thank you for enlightening me.”

 _Deities?_ Ford frowned a little at that. The Master had never said that he was a _god_ in his presence – only a _muse,_ but that had been before he had found out what the Master had really been up to. After that, he had never denied the names that Ford had called him during the years he had been on the run on the other side of the portal – demon, monster – so why not _deity?_

“SO, THAT’S YOUR FORD, HUH? PRETTY QUIET GUY.”

 _“OH, HE’S QUIET BECAUSE I HAVEN’T GIVEN HIM PERMISSION TO OPEN HIS MOUTH YET. LIKE HE HAS ANYTHING TO TALK ABOUT!”_ The Master laughed. _“OH, THAT’S RIGHT – I HAVE TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING. I THINK YOU’RE GOING TO LIKE THIS. SO, YOU SEE HOW HE’S NOT ALL HUMAN, RIGHT?”_ There was a pause for a moment, then the Master spoke again in a darker tone. _“WATCH THIS.”_

Pain suddenly _exploded_ down Ford’s tail, feeling as though someone had suddenly sliced through it from the tip down to its base. He let out a grunting, growling noise in response to it, his hands slipping off his knees and onto the cool tile floor as his halved tail lashed in response to the pain he was feeling.

After a moment, the pain subsided, leaving Ford attempting to calm his accelerated heart rate by breathing deeply instead of fast, shallow breaths.

“Oh, my. Wh-what just—“

“A TAIL SPLITTING? YOU DON’T SEE THAT EVERY DAY.” The voice sounded impressed. “YOU COULD HAVE LET HIM EXPERIENCE IT THE NATURAL WAY, YOU KNOW -- SLOWLY.”

_“I KNOW, BUT I WANTED TO SEE HOW HE’D HANDLE IT ALL AT ONCE! I CAN’T HAVE HIM INCAPACITATED WHEN I NEED HIM.”_

Ford could pick up the amusement in the Master’s voice and knew that there was another reason that the Master wasn’t saying.

Still…tail splitting? Did that mean what he thought it meant?

_“WELL, ON YOUR FEET, FORDSY!”_

Ford rose to his feet, feeling two somethings brushing against the back of his legs instead of one. He didn’t need to turn to look; it was easy enough to guess that he now had two tails instead of one.

That must have been what the Master had meant when he was going to become more like a Vulpix eventually.

Ford’s gaze moved around the throne room, taking in the two identical triangular demons – the one hovering next to him was the Master – and…

Himself.

Ford’s ears flicked forward when he saw the yellow and black robe that his double – no, counterpart – was wearing, complete with triangle motif. It seemed almost…religious.

Suddenly, the fact that the other Cipher had called himself a deity made a lot more sense.

 _“ALL RIGHT. SINCE YOUR LITTLE BISHOP ISN’T AN ENERGY BEING OR AS ALL-KNOWING AS OURSELVES, I AM GOING TO LET HIM ‘BORROW’ FORDSY FOR THE DURATION OF YOUR STAY.”_ The Master rubbed a finger between Ford’s ears, causing them to flick back and forth in response. A small flicker of power zapped between the Master and Ford, causing him to stiffen slightly as his head was suddenly filled with what appeared to be the Fearamid’s floor plan. _“JUST SAY THE WORD, AND HE’LL DO WHATEVER YOU ASK. GOT IT, FORDSY?”_

“Yes, Master,” Ford replied.

His counterpart – Bishop, Ford decided to call him – looked amazed at what the Master had just said. “I-I’m greatly honored. Thank you.” He bowed to the Master, who seemed to radiate pleasure at the action.

“ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.” The other triangle – Lord Cipher, Ford supposed – made a motion with one hand. “HOW ABOUT YOU TWO GET OUT OF HERE SO THAT I CAN HAVE A DISCUSSION WITH MYSELF?”

“Of course, Lord Cipher.” Bishop nodded. “Who am I to meddle in the affairs of gods?” He turned and looked at Ford. “Perhaps you could show me to my temporary quarters…Kitsune?”

“Of course.” Ford stepped away from the throne and started out of the room, Bishop falling into step next to him as the two triangular demons moved away from the Fords.

“How is it that you came into service of your Cipher?” Bishop inquired.

Well, the Master _had_ said “whatever you ask.”

“The Master removed my free will from my soul and transformed me into this.” Ford motioned to his ears. “He did the same to Stanley, Dipper, and Mabel, but they were transformed into different creatures.”

“Stanley, Dipper, and Mabel are in his service as well?” Bishop asked in surprise. A delighted smile crossed his face instantly. “That’s marvelous! I wish that I was as lucky as you are!”

Ford’s left ear twitched at Bishop’s words. Something felt wrong about his answer, but he wasn’t about to point that out.

“Tell me, Kitsune – what were they transformed into?” Bishop pressed.

“Stanley is a changeling, Dipper is a nature sprite, and Mabel is a fairy of some kind.” Ford paused. “I believe her abilities have something to do with the stars, but I haven’t observed her using her abilities enough to know for certain.”

“Fascinating! Your Lord Cipher chose well in what abilities to give you!” Bishop’s eyes were practically shining with excitement, which unnerved Ford – he didn’t think that there was anyone who was still human in any way who would want to serve the Master or his counterparts _willingly._

“So, what sorts of abilities does your form allow you?” Bishop asked.

“Increased strength and speed, along with access to a fire magic of some kind. However, it’s quite…explosive. I doubt the Master would appreciate me giving a demonstration of it here.” Ford motioned to the walls of the Fearamid as he came to a stop in front of an open, triangular doorway. “We’re here.”

Bishop nodded, then stepped through the doorway. Ford followed after him, but lingered in the doorway as Bishop looked around the room, taking in the large bed and extravagant, triangular demon-themed decorations.

“Magnificent,” Bishop said in awe. “Simply magnificent.”

Ford couldn’t help but think of his old study under his home and suppressed the shudder that attempted to rise.

“Do you have your own quarters?” Bishop turned to look at Ford with a curious expression.

Ford shook his head. “I rest in front of the Master’s throne. I have no place such as…this…to rest.” He looked around the room again.

“You rest right at his feet?” Bishop’s eyes almost seemed to be _sparking_ with awe, excitement even. “You are far more lucky than I! Lord Cipher doesn’t allow me to sleep anywhere that I might be remotely physical uncomfortable. To be able to rest at his feet and be ready at a moment’s notice for when he needs you…I wish Lord Cipher had that much trust in me.”

Ford wasn’t exactly sure what he could say to that, considering that Bishop’s experience with his Cipher was clearly different from his own with the Master.

“So!” Bishop walked back over to Ford. “What is the world beyond your Cipher’s palace like? Have you seen it?”

“Not much of it,” Ford admitted. “Stanley, Dipper, and Mabel are sent out into it to spread the Master’s chaos; I have remained here.”

“Truly?” Bishop frowned. “You…are the one who your Cipher reached out to in order to arrive in the physical realm, correct?”

Ford shifted his stance, straightening up and moving his hands behind his back. “Yes, that’s correct.”

“Then why is it that you aren’t leading his forces as he converts those who are still lost? Surely your presence and your words will lead others to follow in your footsteps and join your Cipher.”

“The Master does as he pleases. I have no say in his decisions. If he wishes to send me out, so be it. If he wishes that I remain, so be it. As of this moment in time, he sees me as his pet, so I remain here.”

Bishop blinked at that, looking surprised. “His…pet?” He considered that for a moment. “Well, I suppose that makes sense, considering what you have been transformed into, Kitsune. But still, you were his first! His most prized servant! Surely he would rely on you!”

“Your Lord does not have Stanley’s strength and cunning to rely on as well as your own,” Ford replied. “The Master relies on Stanley to destroy those who would attempt to destroy him from the inside of their own ranks, as Stanley is capable of shifting his form into various appearances and disguising himself until it is far too late for them to realize what it is that has happened. I am unable to do such a thing, as I am incapable of hiding these.” He motioned to his ears, as though that was proof enough.

“What of Dipper and Mabel?” Bishop pressed. “Surely their forms don’t allow them to disguise themselves well, if one is a nature sprite and the other is a star fairy.”

“I have heard the Master praise them for making it appear as though they have merely been affected by the weirdness, rather than transformed by his hand. They have apparently lured many into traps of their own design in this way.”

“Ah!” Bishop’s eyes sparked again – Ford was clearly able to see the yellow and blue sparks that seemed to shoot out of them. “I see! So he is training them as acolytes – and so soon after claiming this world, as well! He wouldn’t allow me to start training my own acolyte until quite some time after, when he was certain that most of our dimension was a part of his collection of followers!”

Ford blinked at that, slowly absorbing the information that Bishop had just revealed. Clearly, he hadn’t completely heard what he had said about Dipper, Mabel, and Stanley – or, if he _had,_ something was preventing him from completely understanding the implications of his words.

Maybe…instead of removing his willpower, Bishop’s Cipher did something to his knowledge instead? Obviously, it hadn’t been completely removed, but if it had been _tampered_ with…

“Now….”

Bishop’s voice drew Ford out of his thoughts, and he looked at his counterpart expectantly.

“I would go straight to sleep, but Lord Cipher’s temple needed much preparing for our departure,” Bishop commented. “Is it possible that you could lead me to the bath?”

“Of course.” Ford motioned for Bishop to accompany him out of his quarters, then started walking down the hall again, relying on the floor map that the Master had given him in order to find his way to the place that Bishop was looking for.

The bath actually wasn’t very far from Bishop’s temporary quarters, and thankfully, when they arrived there was no one else making use of them.

“Magnificent!” Once again, the first thing Bishop laid eyes on was the triangular theme that was prominent throughout the Fearamid. “Truly magnificent!” He seemed to be particularly enamored with the triangular-shaped bath in the center of the room, and in seconds was in the water, his clothes left in a pile at the edge.

Ford remained near the entrance to the room, sitting with his back to the wall and enough room that his two tails wouldn’t be placed in an uncomfortable position. It was probably going to take some time for him to actually bathe, considering how attached he was to his Cipher and anything triangular. He was sure that, if they were going to see Bishop’s Cipher and the Master again, Bishop would be showering praises on them both – mostly the Master for his…taste in decoration.

Absently, he wondered what the two demons could possibly be discussing. How they had brought himself and Bishop into enslavement to them for the rest of eternity? Or what their plans are now that they had caused Weirdmageddon in their respective dimensions?

Another thought occurred to him then.

If Bishop didn’t have Stanley, Dipper, and Mabel with him…where _were_ they? Dead?

Ford hoped—

An aching feeling started up in Ford’s chest, startling him and causing him to wince and shake his head, forcing the feeling back as he put the thought out of his mind.

“Is something wrong?”

Ford looked up at Bishop’s question, blinking when he saw that his counterpart was in the midst of washing his hair. He did his best to avoid staring at the _multitude_ of triangle-themed tattoos that covered Bishop’s body – including the large Zodiac Wheel on his chest.

“You winced just now,” Bishop continued. “Is there something wrong? Is it a message from your Cipher?”

Ford shook his head. “I was just wondering what happened to your brother, niece, and nephew.”

Bishop’s curious expression faded, turning into a dark frown as blue-yellow sparks almost seemed to twinkle in his eyes. “They have yet to see the light that is Lord Cipher, and they have been dragging members of my congregation back into the darkness quite repeatedly. They have continued to trouble us and the paradise that Lord Cipher has created.” He sighed and shook his head, the dark expression fading into a softer sort of sorrow. “I believe that they will eventually come to see that what they are doing is wrong, but Lord Cipher doesn’t have as much faith that my family will convert as I do. You truly are lucky that you have your family by your side, Kitsune.”

“…I suppose so, Bishop.”

Bishop blinked at that. “Bishop?” He smiled. “I like that.”

Ford didn’t know quite what to think of his counterpart now. One moment, he had been a naïve fool under Cipher’s thrall, the next he was a religious _fanatic._ Just what had been _done_ to Bishop?

Ford wasn’t exactly sure if he wanted to find out, lest what had been done to Bishop be done to _him._

Bishop finished bathing, then dressed in his robes and had Ford return him to his quarters to rest.

“Rest in here until I awaken,” Bishop said as he reached the bed. “I’ll let you know when I need you.”

“Of course.” Ford sat down in the center of the room, his tails curling around on either side of him. He waited until Bishop had settled in bed before he allowed himself to drift off by even the smallest amount.

No sense in allowing himself to drift too deep; time passed in odd ways in a world that was technically without it, after all.


	9. Doing the Dirty Work

Probably the one good thing about these little “infiltration missions” the Master sent Stan out on was the fact that he didn’t have to look at those damn triangle tattoos when he was disguised as someone else.

He knew he didn’t have a choice, but he _hated_ the Master with every single fiber of his being, and there was no way that he was just going to let that go. Not like Ford seemed to have done.

Stan drummed his fingers against the table impatiently. He’d taken on the form of a young man this time – a clearly athletic kid who he’d devoured back in Portland when they were given the chance to test out their abilities for the first time – or the _only_ time, in Ford’s case. Football player, dark, curly hair, tall, heavyset – kinda like how he’d been back in high school, except…different.

Getting into the group in Piedmont, California that had been trying to fight back was the easy part. With his present form and the memories of the dead kid, he’d been able to pretend he was on the run and looking for a way to fight back.

Knowing that he was going to be the one to tear the group apart whenever the Master decided? Not so easy.

Especially considering that Dipper’s and Mabel’s parents had joined up a little bit before _he_ had.

“Goddammit, Alex,” Stan muttered under his breath, rubbing at his right temple as he watched the other members of the resistance move around the strangely still-intact house. “ _He_ must’ve known you were up to _something.”_

Another good thing about being out from under the Master’s shadow was that he could find other ways to refer to him in order to stay undercover. Name-calling and pronouns abounded, and it gave Stan a sick glee to know that he could get away with it.

But there was still that ache that he got in his chest every time he attempted to _want_ to help people get away from that triangle freak, and it reminded him that he only had a semblance of freedom at this point – not the real deal.

Stan gritted his teeth and the ache in his chest started up even more fiercely as he attempted to imagine himself tearing the demon’s eye out of its socket, only to hit a mental wall before he could even picture the throne room.

_Goddammit._

“Say, son?”

Stan looked up at the voice and stiffened when he caught sight of Alex Pines – Dipper’s and Mabel’s dad – sitting down on the other side of the table.

“Are you feeling all right?” Alex asked. “You’ve been making some odd expressions.”

Stan grunted. “I’m fine. Just thinking about that stupid demon dorito.”

The best lies were half-truths. Stan had learned that a long time ago.

Alex gained a sympathetic expression and nodded. “Yeah, I know the feeling.” His expression turned into one of anger. “He’s taken my family. I’m not going to let him get away with that.”

Stan wondered how Alex would have known about them. Had he run into Dipper and Mabel when _he_ had sent them out?

“Your family?” Stan repeated.

“My uncles – one of whom _faked his death_ and the other who _started the apocalypse_ – and my own children.” Alex sighed and shook his head. “I can’t believe that something like this could have happened to us. It sounds too impossible.”

Stan frowned. Apparently, Alex _also_ knew about what he and Ford had both done and been up to for the last thirty-odd years – at least, before Weirdmageddon hit. Kinda hard to keep track of time when all the clocks moved at different rates and there was no sun to speak of, but people were apparently adapting to the mess of a world that _he_ had managed to create. Not sure what the triangle would think of that, but if humans could find a way to adapt, they’d definitely find other ways of being able to annoy _him._

“Yeesh. I don’t know what I’d do if my parents were taken by that freak.” Stan started drumming his fingers against the table again in a nonsense rhythm as he tried to drive out the idea of his Ma and Pa being forced to do what he was doing.

He was certain that they’d be fighting back just as much as he was, but he didn’t know how long they would have been able to hold out.

Or even how long Stan himself was going to be able to keep feeling that echo of an ache in his chest every time he thought of trying to get away from his present situation.

Stan paused, focusing more on what Alex had said. “How’d ya know, anyway?”

Alex sighed. “That monster hunted us down using Dipper and Mabel. Apparently, he wanted to see where Dipper and Mabel had come from, then went off to Glass Shard Beach. But Grandma and Grandpa died years ago, so I don’t think he’s going to be able to find what he’s looking for.”

The Master did _what?_ _That_ was something Stan hadn’t heard about.

“Dipper and Mabel?” he prompted instead.

“My kids,” Alex explained. “One of my uncles – the one that started this whole mess – was with them, too.”

So, Ford knew about the kids’ parents.

“Trenchcoat? Fox ears?” Stan guessed.

Alex looked at him sharply. “You’ve _seen_ him?!”

“Yeah, him and this guy who looks a lot like him.” If Stan was going to play this how he wanted to play it, he was going to have to be careful how he worded his responses and what exactly he let slip. “They were up in Portland a while back. Completely destroyed the place. I think I saw that uncle guy’s lookalike eating people.”

 _“Eating_ people?!” Alex looked startled at that. “That’s…” He looked sick for a moment, then gained a dark frown. “Even though beating that Bill Cipher might be impossible right now, I bet we can weaken him by taking his minions down one by one.”

“He’s been getting more minions, though,” Stan pointed out. “I had to hide from a number of them coming down here. Do you realize how _hard_ it is to _not_ get burned to death?”

A near-complete lie, considering that Stan wasn’t _actually_ going to get attacked by any of the Henchmaniacs, but he thought that Pyronica probably had a bit _too_ much fun shooting fireballs at him in order to get him into the resistance’s safe house.

Stan tried not to think about the dead look that came over his brother’s face whenever the demoness entered the room with that hungry look in her eye.

“Which is why we’re planning on laying low for a while and figuring out their strengths and weaknesses before we make a move against them,” Alex insisted. “I’ve talked with the leader of this group, and he agrees with me.”

“What about your family?” Stan frowned.

Alex blinked at the question, then sighed and bowed his head. “And that is presently my problem.”

Alex didn’t want to do to them what they were _probably_ planning on doing to the rest of the demonic monster’s henchmen. Stan didn’t know if that was a smart idea or a stupid one.

Considering what that creep had _done_ to them? Probably a stupid idea.

“You’d probably been better off not knowing,” Stan muttered.

Alex turned his head and blinked at Stan’s statement before frowning. “You’re suggesting that I forget that my _family_ is _working_ for the demon that caused this apocalypse?”

Stan blinked. “Uh….”

“Young man, I don’t know how exactly it is that you’re feeling right now, considering what’s happened, but I am not about to abandon my family, even though they are with some…some geometrical horror!”

Geometrical horror. Stan added that to his mental list of names for the demon.

“We are going to find a way to rescue them, physical changes or—“

“I’m gonna stop you right there, because you didn’t see what happened in Portland.”

Alex blinked at that, then frowned.

“There was this one guy – fox ears and a tail—“

“I saw him,” Alex said.

“Yeah. He was setting stuff on fire – literally throwing fireballs from his hands at people.” Stan mimed throwing something, causing Alex’s eyes to widen. “Magic or something. Those kids? One of ‘em was able to cover the _entire city_ in trees. The other one _sucked up_ the nuclear power plants in _a black hole._ ”

Alex suddenly looked very uncertain at what Stan was telling him.

 _Now to_ really _hit him in the gut._

“And that other old man? The one in the sleezy suit and looks like the guy with the ears?”

Alex nodded slowly.

“He eats people and turns into them. He could _look_ like anybody, _act_ like anybody – shoot, he could _be_ anybody.”

Alex’s eyes widened at that. “ _Becomes_ the people he eats?” He sat back in his chair, looking sick. “Have they really changed that much?”

“Yeah. If you wanna think of a way to turn ‘em against that monster, go ahead, but it’s gonna be _hard.”_ Stan made a dismissive wave and leaned back in his chair, folding his arms across his chest.

He didn’t bother to mention that he was starting to think that the idea was hopeless; that Alex may as well give up and go into hiding somewhere with his wife instead of actively fighting back. Getting attention from that three-sided freakshow would only get him killed at this point – or worse even, depending on how _he_ felt when _he_ would finally catch them.

At least Stan could still hold onto his anger, even if the concept of free will and hope slid between his fingers and left him feeling empty inside. Empty, he was familiar with – it’s hard not to feel like that, when your brother is a know-it-all genius and Pa kicks you out for messing something up and saying that you’re pretty much worthless – but _this_ kind of empty was one that Stan was certain he was never going to get used to.

Or at least, he was going to _try_ to never get used to it.

Stan felt an itchy feeling at the back of his mind, and he snorted a sigh and closed his eyes for a moment.

_“GET MOVING, FEZ! TEACH THOSE HUMANS A LESSON!”_

_And Dipper and Mabel’s parents?_

_“EH. DO WHATEVER. I’VE GOT NO USE FOR THEM.”_

“No.”

Stan opened his eyes when he heard Alex’s voice.

“I can’t just give up on them. That wouldn’t be right. There has to be a way to get them on our side!” Alex slammed a fist into the table.

“You’ve got pretty good… _determination,_ Alex,” Stan growled as the pain in his chest flared up, “but I really doubt yer gonna be able ta do anythin’ ta get us ta come around.”

Alex turned his head sharply to stare at Stan in shock and surprise as Stan’s entire body seemed to ripple before morphing into his original shape. “Wh-what the – Uncle Stan?!” He scrambled out of his seat as Stan rose from his own. Alex’s face quickly paled. “That kid – he – you—“

“Yeah.” Two extra sets of eyes opened on Stan’s face, one pair above and below his original set, all six eyes glowing an ominous green. “I warned ya, didn’t I?”

Alex backed up against the wall behind him, then gritted his teeth as his eyes narrowed. “What are you going to do now? Eat me?”

“Nah. You know who’s actually bein’ surprisingly _lenient_ on that. For now, anyway.” Stan jerked his head towards the door. “Take Karen an’ go. I might not be so _nice_ next time we run into each other.”

Alex didn’t move.

“What are ya waitin’ for?! _GO!”_

Stan started shifting, letting his feathery, furry monster form take over and making Alex weak in the knees in terror before he turned and ran out of the room. Stan exited the room in a different way, merging with the shadows and making his way to where he knew that the leader of this particular resistance happened to be. The man’s scent was all over the place, but it did happen to be strengthening in a certain direction….

He found the rebellion’s leader working on paperwork in the back of the house, talking with advisors – seriously, who does _that_ anymore? – about trading groups in order to get the weapons they needed.

**“The only thing that you’ve got to your name is your life.”**

The leader of the rebellion and his two advisors stiffened and looked around at the sound of Stan’s warped voice. He hated how it sounded when he was like this – it sounded like he actually _was_ a monster. He didn’t need to sound like one when he already _felt_ like one.

“What are you?!” the leader demanded. “How did you manage to get in here?!”

**“Like you’re ever going to find out.”**

Stan melted out of the shadows and lunged for the two men, jaw practically unhinging as he went.

When he left the room moments later, licking the remaining inner bodily fluids from his lips, he could already hear the screams from the other people who happened to be in the building. He transformed into the leader’s right-hand schmuck and ran down the hall to join the panicking people.

The freak in the pyramid was gonna want chaos, and Stan had a lot of anger that he was holding onto. Might as well make use of that while giving _that goddamned Master_ one hell of a show.

**Change in POV**

Dipper and Mabel were outside the “base” that the recent rebellion had taken over – a large house in what used to be southern California – when a loud round of screams came from some of the open windows.

They exchanged looks, then jumped off the remains of a church steeple seconds before it collapsed. A large lilly pad covered in frills of grass materialized under Dipper’s bare feet, giving him a soft landing as Mabel glided down and landed next to him.

A loud, deep bellow suddenly echoed out of the house, gently shaking the earth and making Dipper’s antlers rattle.

“Grunkle Stan’s really scary,” Mabel said, shivering. Stardust fell from her hair and twinkled faintly as it fell to the ground, which was starting to grow a number of probably-poisonous flowers at their feet.

Dipper nodded in agreement. “Y-yeah, but we’re probably pretty scary, too. I haven’t seen people look at us the same way since….” He trailed off, thinking back to what happened in Portland, and quickly put it out of his mind.

He didn’t want to think about the blank look that came over his sister’s face every time she went that far with her powers, and the look of horror she had afterwards when she’d realized what she’d done.

“I-I don’t like doing this,” Mabel sniffled. “It _hurts,_ Dipper.”

“Yeah,” Dipper replied quietly. “I know.” He reached over and grabbed Mabel’s hand and squeezed it, hoping that it would help ease the pain he knew she felt in her soul – the want to make sure that their parents were all right. It was like when he felt the pain from the echo of his more paranoid self from the past, when he could have tried to put together a plan to stop Bill – or, at least, rescue Ford.

But now….

Dipper closed his eyes and shivered as a voice echoed in his mind.

_“ALL RIGHT, YOU TWO. FEZ IS NEARLY DONE IN THERE – TIME TO DO YOUR THING! AND MAKE IT SHOWY!”_

Mabel shivered next to him. “Yes, Master.”

Dipper sighed. “Yes, Master.”

The two of them faced the large house that Stan had disappeared into, then tightened their grips on each other’s hands. A green glow emanated from the birthmark on Dipper’s forehead as his eyes became even more vibrant with a strange power, Mabel’s eyes becoming the same as they glowed a deep purple.

Roots suddenly exploded from the ground near Dipper’s feet, covered in starlight sparkles as they dug through the earth towards the house at high speed, multiplying and circling around the building. Trees grew up and around the house as a black blur dashed out of the front door; they wrapped themselves around it and squeezed as they grew taller and wider.

_CRUNCH._

The trees suddenly collapsed in on themselves, then molded together into one large tree with a starlight-covered trunk and sparkling purple leaves that seemed to warp and twist, even though there wasn’t a wind that could have moved them.

The black blur that had left the house moved over to where Dipper and Mabel stood, morphing into a more familiar form with a tired expression. His eyes were still alight with a fury that Dipper knew only he could hold onto.

_“SO, WHAT DO YOU THINK, BUDDY?”_

Stan, Dipper, and Mabel didn’t move from where they stood; they knew that the Master was above them, and he’d call for their attention when he needed it.

“NOT BAD, NOT BAD. KINDA WISH I’D THOUGHT OF THIS WHEN THOSE BRATS AND THE OLD MAN CAME TO ‘RESCUE’ MY FORDSY. HEH, LIKE THEY’D BE ABLE TO DO ANYTHING FOR HIM NOW!”

The three stiffened a little at the familiar voice, but the different echo of power; was there _another_ triangular demon above them now?

_“HEH, YEAH, I KNOW! YOU REALLY DID A NUMBER ON HIM IF YOU CAN KEEP HIM ON A LEASH WITHOUT ACTUALLY KEEPING HIM ON ONE!”_

“I KNOW! IT GETS A BIT BORING WHEN HE DOESN’T SASS BACK, THOUGH. I’VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT WAYS TO MAKE THIS A LOT MORE FUN. DOING THINGS LIKE THIS MIGHT MAKE THINGS A LOT MORE…INTERESTING, AT LEAST FOR A WHILE.”

_“EXACTLY MY IDEA! BESIDES, I LEFT THE OTHER STUFF INTACT FOR A REASON – MAYBE THEY’LL START ACTUALLY ENJOYING THIS SOMEWHERE DOWN THE LINE!”_

Stan stiffened at that, gritting his teeth, but said nothing. Mabel gripped Dipper’s hand more tightly as she bit her lower lip so hard that it could start bleeding.

Dipper clenched his eyes shut tightly, shaking at the idea that he’d actually _enjoy_ what the Master was telling them to do – be _eager_ for the next order that could come.

His chest ached when he attempted to hope that such a thing would never happen, and his heart sank at the realization that it might.

_Is there anyone out there who would be able to save us?_


	10. Bounty Hunting

“Kitsune.”

Ford’s eyes snapped open when he heard his counterpart’s voice. He looked up at Bishop, ears flicking forward expectantly.

“Our Lord Ciphers have need of us.” Bishop’s expression was serious; he seemed to have slipped into his “religious fanatic” persona as Ford had lightly slept. “Come.”

Ford rose to his feet and nodded slightly in response, then started out of the bedroom and towards the throne room. Bishop fell into step beside him, his expression unchanging.

Absently, Ford wondered what exactly it was that the Master needed him for. All he’d done so far was sit at the foot of the Master’s throne as his pet. Or his trophy.

Was the Master planning on making use of him as he had in Portland?

As Ford and Bishop reached their destination, Ford’s ears twitched as he started picking up faint sounds. It sounded as though…there was someone shouting.

A _counterpart_ shouting.

“If you think that I’m going to believe for one second that you have—“

_“THERE THEY ARE!”_

Ford and Bishop stopped at the entrance to the throne room as the Master turned to face them, eye crinkled in amusement. “Lord Cipher” turned to face them as well, a similar expression in his eye.

And between them, cuffed hand and foot and standing next to what looked like a blue, skinny troll carrying a sniper rifle and a cannon on his back, was a Ford. A slightly _younger_ Ford, to be sure, considering that his hair had only started to gray, but a Ford nonetheless.

Ford’s counterpart turned his head at the Master’s words, and his eyes widened as the color drained from his face.

“TO MY SIDE, BISHOP,” Lord Cipher said.

 _“GET OVER HERE, FORDSY,”_ the Master added.

“Of course, my lord!” Bishop’s expression promptly changed to the more naïve, awed expression he’d had when he’d arrived, and he moved quickly over to Lord Cipher’s side with a spring in his step.

“Yes, Master.” Ford took even strides over to where the Master hovered and stopped next to him; his leash materialized almost as soon as he stopped moving, which only made his counterpart even paler.

However, that pale, shocked expression quickly turned to one that was absolutely murderous.

“What did you do to them, Cipher?!” Ford’s counterpart roared, glaring up at the two triangles.

 _“LIKE I’M GONNA TELL YOU, FORDSY.”_ The Master moved as though to flick the man’s nose with a finger, but ended up whacking him in the face as a result of the size difference. _“AND THEY’RE NOT GONNA TELL YOU, EITHER, NO MATTER HOW MUCH ANYBODY BEGS.”_

Ford bowed his head slightly at that. He had thought that was the case, as telling others who weren’t working with or for the Master would have meant they could have devised a way to free them. The Master was covering his tracks, and ensuring that there weren’t any loopholes left behind.

“Is it all right that he told me, my lord?” Bishop asked in a worried tone.

“YEAH, YOU’RE FINE.” Lord Cipher patted Bishop on the head. “WE JUST HAVE TO BE CAREFUL WHEN TALKING TO PEOPLE WHO AREN’T WITH US.”

“Ah, I understand!”

Ford and Bishop’s counterpart gritted his teeth, but there was a spark of fear in his eyes as well as anger.

 _“AS FOR WHAT WE’RE GOING TO DO TO YOU, THOUGH….”_ The Master trailed off as he tapped the bricks below his eye in a thoughtful manner. _“WHILE IT WOULD BE INTERESTING TO HAVE_ TWO _FORDS AT OUR BECK AND CALL, I’D RATHER NOT HAVE TO FIGHT ME TO FIND OUT WHO GETS YOU. AND YOU’RE CLAIMED ALREADY, ANYWAY.”_

“Claimed?!”

But the Master’s attention had already moved to the troll that was standing next to the Ford, who appeared to be slightly unnerved. _“SO, BUDDY, YOU WANTED THAT REWARD, RIGHT? YOU GOT THE WRONG CIPHERS, BUT I’D BE MORE THAN WILLING TO POINT YOU IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION.”_

“I’d appreciate it,” the troll grunted in reply. “I’ve been promised a reward for bringing this guy in, and I’d rather not miss out on it because of some doofus mistake.”

 _“SURE, SURE! I’LL MAKE SURE TO GET INTO CONTACT WITH THE GUY – SHOULDN’T BE TOO HARD, IF HE’S LOOKING FOR HIS FORD! YOU JUST WAIT HERE WHILE I TAKE CARE OF THAT.”_ The Master dematerialized the leash he had been holding onto. _“FORDSY, YOU GO OVER THERE – TAKE A NAP OR SOMETHING. THIS IS GOING TO TAKE A WHILE.”_ He pointed over to his throne, where Stan, Dipper, and Mabel were already kneeling, heads bowed and eyes closed.

“Yes, Master.” Ford walked over and got down on his knees next to Stan and bowed his own head, as well. He closed his eyes just as the Master sat down on his throne and turned to stone abruptly.

Bishop let out a gasp. “He has entered the Mindscape!”

“THANK YOU FOR STATING THE OBVIOUS, FORD,” Lord Cipher replied in a slightly annoyed tone. “WE KINDA HAVE TO GO THERE SOMETIMES IF OUR OTHER MES HAVEN’T GOTTEN WEIRDMAGEDDON STARTED YET.”

“O-oh! My apologies for my ignorance on the matter, my lord.”

“ALL IS FORGIVEN.”

Ford heard a gagging sort of snarl from his other counterpart at Bishop and Lord Cipher’s words, then a grunt of pain.

“Keep quiet, you,” the troll growled. “Let the triangle do his work. Or do I have ta gag ya?”

Ford heard a muttering grumble in response.

“You seem far too angry,” Bishop said. “Perhaps you are unenlightened? I can instruct you in—“

“No!” the other barked back. “I will not fall for that! If you think that following Bill Cipher blindly is being _enlightened,_ then you’re truly _ignorant!”_

“Ignorant? I?” Bishop’s voice had suddenly taken a darker turn. He let out a laugh. “Only the ignorant think that the enlightened are below them. I _know_ that there are beings out there far more knowledgeable than I, and I am lucky to be capable of serving one!”

“He’s _enslaved_ you, just like that one’s enslaved _him!_ Don’t lie to me, Stanford – you’re _me._ You’ve been fighting against Cipher, too! You can’t just turn over to his side like his manipulation never happened!”

“Manipulation? Ha! Listen to you, not knowing the meaning of the word _persuasion.”_

“You are perverting that word’s definition and you know it!”

The troll decided to speak up again. “Hey! I thought I told you to—“

“WAIT. I WANT TO HEAR THIS OUT.” Lord Cipher sounded amused.

“Perverting? I highly doubt that.” Bishop sounded smug.

“Of course you would; Cipher’s done _something_ to you that’s made you think all _wrong._ And – you! My other counterpart! That other Cipher’s gone right now – you can get out of here!”

Ford’s ears twitched, registering the fact that his counterpart had turned to face him, but he didn’t move or lift his head to look at him. The Master had told him to join his family in their present position – he wasn’t able to move.

Stan grunted next to him; was he trying to disobey the Master’s orders?

“Come on! Go! Get out of here while you still can!”

Lord Cipher started laughing. “THIS IS TOO HILARIOUS! MAN, YOU REALLY DON’T KNOW WHAT WE’RE CAPABLE OF!”

Ford’s counterpart let out a roar of defiance at that, but it was quickly changed to a yelp of pain.

“Ah ah ah,” came Bishop’s voice again, taking on that religious fanatic tone. “I won’t let you near my lord. Not yet. You haven’t confessed yet!”

“Confessed?! I confess nothing!” It sounded like Ford’s counterpart was struggling. “If I was to ‘confess’ anything, it would be that I hope to live to see the day that Bill Cipher _dies!”_

That sent a chill down Ford’s spine. His counterpart didn’t know the full extent of what the Master and his counterparts were capable of. If he really thought that he was going to be able to do what he had just sworn….

Bishop sighed. “It seems that I cannot get through to you. Well, if I cannot…than perhaps your Cipher will.”

Ford’s counterpart didn’t answer verbally, but Ford felt as though someone’s gaze had been turned to him.

Something in the air rippled suddenly, causing Ford to stiffen and his ears to swivel in order to find the source.

_“I’M BACK! AND I’VE BROUGHT SOMEONE WITH ME!”_

Ford’s body relaxed only slightly. He should have known that would have signaled the Master’s return.

“Niiice place you’ve got!” said a new voice with a tone of approval. It sounded vaguely like Cipher, but without the level of power that the Master or Lord Cipher had. “Loving the décor – are those members of the Zodiac up there?”

 _“YUP! THOUGHT THEY COULD BEST ME BY USING THE WHEEL AGAINST ME. THEN FORDSY AND FEZ GOT INTO A BIT OF A SPAT AND I GOT IN THERE BEFORE THEY COULD DO ANYTHING TO CORRECT IT!”_ The Master laughed. _“I’VE GOT THE REST OF THEM RIGHT OVER THERE.”_

The voice laughed. “Hey, nice! I love what you did with them! Oh? And here’s my Ford! I’ve been wondering where you’d wandered off to!”

Ford heard his counterpart snarl, followed shortly by the familiar noise of boots scuffing against the stone floor.

The voice _tsked._ “You really should know by now that you can’t get away from me. At least, not for long, anyway. Did you really think you could avoid me by avoiding sleep? You’ve become sloppy, Sixer!”

“Don’t call me that,” Ford’s counterpart snarled.

There came a chuckle. “Oh, I don’t think you’ll be saying that soon enough. I need your help, Sixer. It’s about time that you came back. Come on, you must be tired.”

“No! You won’t play that trick on me again!” Ford’s counterpart sounded desperate now.

“Oh, I’m not so sure about that. See? Your eyelids are getting heavy already.” The voice took on a different tone, then: smooth, rhythmic. “Close your eyes, Ford. You need to sleep. Sleep, my little nerd~”

In fact, Ford might say that the voice was almost…

Hypnotic.

“N-no….” Ford’s counterpart’s voice sounded weakened. Ford himself could feel himself getting pulled in by the voice. It wasn’t like he was doing anything else right now--

Something tugged at the back of Ford’s mind suddenly, causing his head to jerk up instead of fall against his chest. He blinked his eyes open in confusion. Where had _that_ come from?

The Master pulled his hand back, blue strings flickering out of sight. His eye moved down to the figures that were standing on the ground, and Ford followed his gaze.

“Yes, that’s it.” A gold-haired man wearing a black top hat and a yellow and black suit grinned menacingly at Ford’s counterpart, who was swaying on his feet and clearly fighting off something as his eyes flickered open and shut rapidly. “You’ve been traveling for a long time without rest. Let it catch up to you.”

Ford’s counterpart shook his head weakly. “N-no.” It looked like he was valiantly trying to stay awake and fight the other’s voice, but his body made it clear that it was a losing battle: his shoulders were relaxing from their stiff, defensive stance, and his eyes were staying closed for longer moments. His legs were even threatening to give themselves out at any moment, trembling and making his body sway as it tried to find its sense of balance.

“Yes.” The man’s voice added a soft hiss to the end of the word. He held his fingers up and snapped them in the face of Ford’s counterpart. “Sleep!”

Ford’s counterpart stiffened suddenly at the noise, but then his eyes rolled back into his head as his legs finally gave out from under him.

The Master pointed and fired a bolt of energy, conjuring up a bed underneath Ford’s counterpart just before his head could have connected with the floor. _“THERE WE GO. CAN’T HAVE HIM DAMAGED, NOW CAN WE?”_ He chuckled darkly.

“Indeed not.” The man rubbed his hands together eagerly as he moved closer to the head of the now-sleeping man. “I’d do this back at my place, but I’d rather not let on that I’m more than they think I am. I was prepared that something like this would happen, though.” He bent over Ford’s counterpart. “Stanford, can you hear me?”

“…yes…”

Ford stiffened at the quiet, almost monotone answer. His counterpart must have entered a trance, induced by the man who sounded like a less-powered Cipher.

Which meant that his counterpart’s mind was open to being manipulated.

“Good.” The Cipher in human form grinned a little too widely for a normal human to grin. “You’re to address me as Master Cipher when you’re in a trance, and Dr. Mindbender when you’re not. Do you understand?”

“…yes, Master Cipher…”

Ford felt a chill run down his spine at his counterpart’s answer. He had been so angry and – and _stubborn_ before, something that Ford definitely couldn’t be now. But now, with his counterpart’s mental defenses down and his mind open to suggestion?

Stan grunted next to him. He must have looked up and started watching, just as Ford had. Judging from the noise, he’d probably been caught by a _want_ that he wasn’t able to follow through on.

“Excellent. Now, let these next thoughts settle deep into your mind. Let them take root and be difficult to remove, for they are to become complete truths in your mind.” The Cipher – Dr. Mindbender _(why did he choose_ that _name for himself?)_ – placed a hand on Stanford’s head, and a spark of _something_ ran down his arm as he spoke in a more serious, dark tone. “You are my assistant. You are loyal and obedient to a fault. You will not question what I tell you, whether it be an explanation or an order. Forget Gravity Falls. Forget its anomalies. They are no longer important. Your brother is no longer important to you, whether it be a grudge or his friendship.”

Stanford’s face flickered for a moment with some emotion, then fell still as another spark of power went from Mindbender to him.

Ford felt his tails stiffen at the implication of Mindbender’s words. He was essentially turning Stanford into a servant – one with a whole soul, yes, but a servant regardless.

“I found you and saw your potential and brought you to work under me, away from your university. You will only be curious about the projects you see me working on, not the ones that our colleagues are pursuing. Forget Fiddleford Hadron McGucket as a friend – he was only a rival for the position as my assistant, nothing more. You see me as a teacher, a friend, a guide, a role model, a mentor. Your time in the portal will be a blur, a nightmare, explained away by an accident of my choosing which sent you into a coma for a time. When you awaken, you will be home. And you will only awaken when you hear me say your name again. Do you understand?”

Another spark ran between Mindbender and Stanford, causing Stanford to stiffen slightly before his body went limp again. “…yes, Master Cipher….”

Mindbender nodded in approval, then removed his hand from Stanford’s head and massaged his wrist. “Hoo! He’s stubborn, but he’s let me mess with his head enough times to know that I just need to scramble his mental energy enough for my words to stick at least a little. Now, I just need to get him home and I can jump back into my vessel and wake him up.” He grinned. “Lucky for me, I’ve got a working portal right in front of me there! Just move this guy to a place that I can reach and I’ll take care of the rest!”

“Hey!”

Ford’s gaze moved to the troll that was standing next to where Stanford had been standing on his feet a moment ago. The alien creature appeared annoyed.

“What about my reward for bringing that guy in, huh?” The troll folded his arms across his chest. “You _did_ promise a reward to the first guy who managed to find him.”

“Oh, right!” Mindbender gained a wide, dark grin. “How could I forget? How uncouth of me!” He reached into a pocket of his pants and pulled out a glowing yellow orb. “One Time Wish, swiped from Time Baby himself before he called me a nuisance and kicked me out of his century! Man, those were good times – I’m gonna have to see if I can bug him again! Maybe even kill him and take his time powers!”

 _“OH, YES, THAT’S THE BEST FEELING,”_ the Master agreed instantly.

“I HIGHLY RECOMMEND IT,” added Lord Cipher.

The troll looked at the Time Wish with an amazed expression as Ford’s tails started twitching. An actual _Time Wish._ He’d only heard about them from stories of others who had actually competed in Globnar – not to mention what Dipper had scribbled in his journal on the empty pages – but he never thought that he’d actually see one this close.

“Thanks. I definitely know how I’m gonna use this.” The troll grinned widely and crushed the glowing orb in his hands. “Now my weapons are never gonna run out of ammo. I can hunt down bounties and never have to worry about getting bullets instead of food!”

 _“SINCE YOU’RE SO INTENT ON FINDING BOUNTIES….”_ The Master moved in front of the troll, steepling his fingers in front of his eye. _“HOW ABOUT WE MAKE A DEAL?”_

Ford felt a chill run down his spine at that. He remembered the last round of deals that the Master had fulfilled the bargains of – the men and women who had been brought to the Fearamid after Weirdmageddon had begun.

What did the Master have in mind now…?

 _“THERE’S AN INFINITE NUMBER OF UNIVERSES OUT THERE, YOU KNOW. AN INFINITE NUMBER OF UNIVERSES MEANS AN INFINITE NUMBER OF BOUNTIES. ONE BOUNTY IN PARTICULAR.”_ The Master definitely sounded like he was leading up to something. _“HOW ABOUT YOU WORK FOR ME – WELL, ALL THE MES OUT IN THE MULTIVERSE? PUT TOGETHER A BOUNTY HUNTER NETWORK SPECIFICALLY TO FIND GUYS LIKE HIM.”_ He pointed at the entranced Ford lying on the conjured bed. _“IT’S GOING TO BE WORTH YOUR WHILE, I GUARANTEE IT!”_

Something stirred in the back of Ford’s mind. _No…_

“Look for the exact same guy? I dunno.” The troll sounded doubtful. “That’d get kinda boring after a while.”

 _“WELL, IT DOESN’T HAVE TO BE_ JUST _HIM, JUST_ MOSTLY _HIM. I MEAN, HE’S TRICKY TO TRACK AND EVEN TRICKIER TO KEEP IMPRISONED. AND NOT ALL OF THEM ARE THE SAME, EITHER! THINK OF IT AS AN ULTIMATE CHALLENGE. AND YOU’LL STILL GET YOUR REWARD….”_

_No no no no no! He can’t--_

Pain _exploded_ in Ford’s chest, causing him to nearly bend over as he gritted his teeth.

“OH! LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE DOESN’T LIKE THAT IDEA!” Lord Cipher sounded amused. “MAYBE YOU SHOULD TEACH HIM A LESSON, CIPHER.”

 _“AFTER I GET THIS SORTED OUT,”_ the Master replied. He looked back at the troll as Ford’s ears flicked back. _“SO, WHAT DO YOU SAY? YOU UP TO PLAYING A LITTLE SEEK-AND-SCREAM ON THE SIDE?”_

The troll actually – somehow – looked thoughtful at the question. “Well, if it’s on the side…and I guess that your rewards are pretty high up there….” He looked back at the weapons on his back for a moment, then looked back at the Master. “All right. You can count on me and my buddies to round them up.” He held out a hand.

 _“DEAL!_ ” The Master shook the troll’s hand with a blast of blue flame. _“EVERY FORD YOU BRING IN, I’LL FIND THE CIPHER HE BELONGS TO AND GET YOU YOUR REWARD. I MAY TAKE A CUT ON OCCASION, THOUGH.”_

“So long as I get my thrill, that’s fine.” The troll grinned, showing a large amount of sharpened teeth that made it look like he’d implanted a shark’s jaw into his mouth. “What are you getting out of this?”

 _“ME? OH, JUST A LITTLE BIT OF…ENTERTAINMENT ON MY PART. BESIDES, I’VE ALREADY_ GOT _MY FORD. MIGHT AS WELL GET SOME OF MY COUNTERPARTS IN DEBT TO ME JUST FOR THE HECK OF IT!”_ The Master burst out laughing, letting go of the troll’s hand. “ _GET GOING, BUDDY! THERE’S AN INFINITE NUMBER OF FORDS OUT THERE JUST WAITING TO BE CAUGHT! GET TO IT!”_

“Yes, sir!” The troll sprinted out of the throne room, gun and cannon banging against his back as the pain in Ford’s chest faded and he brought himself back into an upright position.

He caught sight of the look that Stan was shooting in his direction – the anger and concern boiling together in his eyes – but Ford didn’t look over at him.

 _“NOW THAT THAT’S SETTLED, LET’S TAKE CARE OF GETTING YOU AND YOUR LITTLE FRIEND BACK TO YOUR DIMENSION, HUH?_ ” The Master eyed Mindbender and the unconscious Ford with an amused expression.

“Much obliged,” Mindbender replied with a grin.

 _“YOU FOUR DON’T NEED TO BE WATCHING THIS ANYMORE, AND THIS IS GONNA TAKE A BIT.”_ The Master motioned to Ford, Stan, Dipper, and Mabel. _“TAKE A NAP OR SOMETHING.”_

Ford bowed his head and closed his eyes in response to the statement, settling into a deep breathing rhythm.

“WE SHOULD GET GOING OURSELVES,” Lord Cipher said. “WHO KNOWS WHAT THOSE HEATHENS HAVE BEEN DOING IN OUR DIMENSION SINCE WE LEFT IT!”

“Indeed!” Bishop agreed instantly.

 _“COME BACK WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE IT! IT’S GETTING TO BE KINDA_ DULL _AROUND HERE WITHOUT ANYTHING NEW TO CONQUER – I COULD USE A DISTRACTION OR TWO!”_

“I’LL KEEP THAT IN MIND!”

A moment later, there were two shockwaves of power that rippled across the throne room before everything went still.


	11. Cipher's Messenger

Ford had been deep in sleep when he was suddenly yanked up into the air and forced into a completely upright position. His eyes snapped open in surprise as he was jarred awake.

 _“I SAW THAT LITTLE SPARK OF SOMETHING FROM YOU,”_ the Master growled in a warning tone, his eye flickering red as he glared at Ford. _“I KNOW I TOOK EVERY OUNCE OF IT FROM YOU – DO YOU_ WANT _ME TO TAKE YOUR EMOTIONS FROM YOU TOO AND LEAVE YOU A COLD HUSK? BECAUSE I CAN DO THAT, FORDSY.”_

Ford swallowed at the implications of that.

The Master eyed him for a moment longer, as though expecting an answer, then left Ford drop almost to the floor before snatching him up again – in a hand this time, rather than holding Ford up using his telekinetic power. _“YOU’RE NOTHING TO ME. LESS THAN NOTHING, EVEN. I WOULD HAVE THOUGHT THAT HAD ALREADY GOTTEN INTO YOUR HEAD, FORD, CONSIDERING HOW YOU’VE BEEN ACTING.”_

The Master squeezed, causing Ford to wince as his ribs ached in response to the tightness of the Master’s fingers. His ears flicked back against his head as he gritted his teeth.

The Master squeezed a little more tightly. _“HAVE YOU EVER MET ANY OF YOUR COUNTERPARTS, STANFORD?”_

“S-some, Master.” Ford gasped for air.

_“HOW MANY? AND DON’T COUNT THE TWO WHO WERE IN HERE EARLIER.”_

“Three. W-we separated as soon as we caught sight of each other.”

Ford didn’t see the need to say why. He was sure the Master already knew of the reason.

 _“THAT’S NOT AS MANY AS I WOULD HAVE LIKED TO HEAR. WELL, EITHER WAY, YOU’RE GOING TO BE MEETING A LOT MORE!”_ The Master loosened his grip on Ford, causing him to hack and cough as he desperately tried to get some air back into his lungs. _“BEFORE I CAN SEND YOU OUT THOUGH, MY LITTLE MESSENGER, THERE’S A FEW THINGS THAT I NEED TO MAKE SURE YOU_ REMEMBER _BEFORE YOU COULD END UP MESSING THIS UP. FIRST OFF, THE ONLY THING YOU’RE GOING TO BE DOING IS GOING IN THERE, TAKING YOUR COUNTERPART FROM THE BOUNTY HUNTERS, AND GETTING BACK HERE. MINIMAL TALKING, JUST CONFIRM THAT YOUR COUNTERPART IS THE GUY YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE PICKING UP, WHAT DIMENSION HE’S FROM, AND WHAT THE ME WHO WANTS HIM IS OFFERING AS A REWARD. WITH ME SO FAR?”_

Ford nodded.

 _“GOOD. AND MAKE SURE THAT YOU DON’T TRY TO QUESTION MY ORDERS, FORDSY. I CAN LET YOU GO BRAIN DEAD AGAIN FOR A WHILE IF THAT DOESN’T SINK IN.”_ The Master eyed Ford for a moment before continuing, _“AND DON’T TELL YOUR COUNTERPARTS ANYTHING. I DON’T WANT THEM GETTING ANY IDEAS AND THINKING THEY CAN GET OUT OF HERE.”_

Ford bowed his head in response to that. “Yes, Master. Understood.”

 _“EXCELLENT.”_ The Master’s eye crinkled in approval. _“_ _THE BOUNTY HUNTERS HAVE ALREADY COME UP WITH SOMETHING. YOU’RE GOING TO GO GET YOUR COUNTERPART AND COME BACK. REMEMBER WHAT I TOLD YOU!”_

The Master raised another hand and snapped his fingers, and instantly Ford’s vision swirled as the Master’s other hand let him go. In seconds, he felt and heard the crunch of rocky soil under his feet. His ribs still ached a little, but that wasn’t the focus of Ford’s attention.

“What the he—“

The blue troll standing next to the stocky, red-faced pig-creature knocked his companion over the head. “Don’t swear in front of this guy! He’s from Cipher directly!”

The pig-faced male alien rubbed the top of his head between a pair of horn-like ears and glared at the troll. “I’ll swear if I like! I don’t care if this guy works for that triangle!” He looked back at Ford. “You’re here to pick him up?”

“I am,” Ford replied with a curt nod.

The pig-faced alien nodded. “He’s over here with the rest of the caravan. I‘ve had ‘im in my line-up for the last couple of days. Don’t know what dimension he belongs in, though, so I can’t tell what kinda reward I’m getting’ fer him.” He motioned for Ford to follow him, and he started towards a low, temporary structure that looked like a tarp being held up by thick sticks of something similar to bamboo. Sitting under it to protect themselves from the hot sun that was beating down on the desert landscape were men, women, and children, all chained together in a long line.

Ford knew what that meant.

_Slavers._

Under normal circumstances, he was sure that his counterpart would have managed to find a way to get away eventually – though it depended on his age and experience, not to mention how much sanity he may have managed to hold onto between dimensions and mental attacks.

A twinge of sorrow rose up for a moment, but Ford pushed it back down. The Master probably wouldn’t approve of any emotional turmoil.

“There he is. He’s been giving me trouble for the last couple of days, so I’ve been cuttin’ back on his rations.” The pig-faced alien motioned to a figure curled up on the ground at the back of the chained slaves, using a ragged, torn trench coat that clearly looked like it had seen better days as a blanket. “Have ‘ta hide sleeping drugs in his water ta get him ta sleep; he figured out that I’m doin’ it, so I’ve been forcin’ it down his throat.”

The curled form shifted slightly, deep breathing growing ragged suddenly. Then the figure uncurled suddenly and sat upright, bloodshot eyes wide and looking around quickly before focusing on Ford.

Ford’s ear twitched when he saw the panicked look in his counterpart’s eyes, the unkempt look of his hair, his clothes. Vaguely, he remembered that he had once been in that state himself.

Right when he had been spat out of his portal and into the Nightmare Realm.

“Wh-what—“ Stanford stared at Ford as he stumbled over his words.

“So yer gonna take this guy and bring me back my reward, right?” the pig-alien asked. He snorted through his nose at the cloud of dust that Stanford had kicked up as a result of his sudden movement.

Ford nodded. “If you’re not sure of what dimension he came from, it will take some time.”

“So long as I get what I deserve for giving you this guy, that’s fine,” the pig-alien grunted in reply. “If ya need it, tell Cipher that he can find me – Baron – in Dimension 64+.”

“If the Master asks for it, I’ll be sure to inform him,” Ford replied.

Stanford blinked blankly at that as Baron grabbed the chain that connected him to the other captives and worked at the lock that was connected to his manacles. His eyes widened further in the moments following as both Ford’s and Baron’s words settled into his head. “W-wait – no! You don’t know what you’re doing! He’s _evil!_ He’s going to destroy the universe! _He could destroy your own universe if you let him!”_

Ford didn’t answer as he grabbed the chain that connected the manacles on Stanford’s wrists in one hand and grabbed his left arm in another, digging his claw-like nails into the worn material of the trench coat.

He half-expected the universe to collapse right then and there, but everything remained constant and moving. Either he had been misinformed about the state a universe would be in when two counterparts came into contact with each other, or Cipher had done something to him to prevent that from occurring.

Baron let out a bark of laughter. “Like I could care less if it’s your universe! It’s good money!”

The troll, who had been sourly watching from nearby, joined in with the laughter. “Yeah! If it puts food on the table and lets you live comfortably, who cares what he does with you?” He grinned at Ford, showing off his shark teeth. “Pleasure doin’ business with ya.”

Ford gave a curt nod in response, then started half-leading, half-dragging his counterpart back to the point that he had arrived in this dimension, Stanford digging his heels into the rocky dirt and screaming at him to come to his senses.

“Stop this!” Stanford begged as they reached a circular spot of scorched earth. “Working with Cipher will only bring you ill will! He will tear you apart if he hasn’t already! _Let me go! Let me find a way to stop him! Please!”_

Ford’s ears flicked back at Stanford’s screaming, desperate voice, muffling his counterpart’s voice. Hearing his ranting was making him think back to when he had been this desperate and _goddamn it, it certainly wasn’t helping when he already knew he had no choice._

As soon as Ford stepped onto the charred circle of earth, his vision shifted again, momentarily shimmering with a multitude of colors before fading back to the dark, dark black bricks that made up the walls and floor of the Fearamid.

Stanford trembled under Ford’s hand as he looked around the Fearamid with wide eyes, face paling. “Wh-where – n-n-no! No no no no _no!_ ”

_“OH HO, THEY FOUND AN EARLY ONE! IMPRESSIVE!”_

Ford stood at attention as the Master rose from his throne and approached them. His counterpart stopped yelling and stared in horror at the triangle, his eyes quickly moving – no doubt trying to find a way out of his present situation.

 _“SO, WHERE’S THIS ONE FROM?”_ The Master asked, shrinking down and looking close at Stanford, who glared back and gritted his teeth in defiance. There was still a spark of fear dancing in his eyes.

“The one who found him wasn’t sure of my counterpart’s native dimension,” Ford replied evenly.

_“HMPH. WELL, THAT’S A SHAME – WOULD HAVE MADE MY JOB OF FINDING THE RIGHT ME EASIER. NO IDEA WHAT THE AWARD IS, EITHER?”_

“No, Master.”

The Master folded his arms in front of himself and shook back and forth, miming the shake of a head. _“WELL, AT LEAST I HAVE A TIME PERIOD TO WORK WITH. HOW’D THEY FIND HIM?”_

“The one who found him is a slaver; he had no doubt captured my counterpart with the initial intent to sell him.”

Stanford tried to pull away from Ford suddenly, digging his feet into the floor as best he could in an attempt to try to get some traction and run like heck. Ford’s grip on his arm only tightened in retaliation, drawing blood and causing Stanford to cry out in pain.

 _“EASY THERE, FORDSY.”_ The Master wagged a finger. _“DON’T WANT TO DAMAGE THE MERCHANDISE TOO MUCH.”_

Stanford froze at that, and he turned sharply to look at Ford with a wide-eyed expression as Ford’s grip relaxed slightly. “What—“

 _“TAKE HIM TO ONE OF THE CELLS AND KEEP AN EYE ON HIM. TAKE FEZ WITH YOU. TALK IF YOU FEEL LIKE IT, BUT WATCH HOW YOU WORD THINGS – CAN’T HAVE YOU GIVING AWAY TOO MUCH OF WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN HIS FUTURE, SO KEEP IT VAGUE. I’M GOING TO FIND WHERE THIS GUY CAME FROM.”_ The Master tapped Stanford’s forehead with a finger, then moved back and vanished in a bright flash of power.

Ford looked around as Stanford continued to stare at him with a horrified expression. He spotted Stan rising to his feet from where he sat at the foot of the Master’s throne and nodded slightly as Stan started towards them.

“You know where he wants ‘im?” Stan asked, eyeing Stanford as he got close.

Ford nodded curtly in response, then turned and started out of the throne room without another word.

Stan moved up to fall into step with Ford on his left side, as Ford’s grip on Stanford had forced him to Ford’s right. “He gives ya permission ta talk and ya don’t give me a verbal answer?”

“I don’t feel as though it is required,” Ford replied.

“Yeah, well, that’s you.” Stan snorted.

Stanford turned his head to looked over at Stan, eyes wide. “St- _Stanley_?” He tried to stop, but Ford pushed him in the back and caused Stanford to stumble forward and keep moving along with them.

Stan looked over at Stanford, mulling the younger version of his brother over. His mouth twitched, almost as though he was going to smile, only to decide against it. “Yeah.”

Stanford shook his head slowly, taking in the gray hair, the triangle tattoos that circled Stan’s neck, his wrists. “Why are you doing this? You should have seen Cipher for the liar he is, even if I couldn’t!” He tried to motion to Ford as he said this, but his wrists were still chained together by the chain in Ford’s grip, so he ended up making a half-shrugging motion instead.

Stan shook his head. “Can’t tell ya.”

“Why not?!”

“Three-angled an’ yellow zipped our mouths shut on that. Can’t say anythin’ more on the subject.”

Stanford’s head jerked back at that as he paled abruptly. “You mean you – _you’re taking orders from him?!_ He is _going_ to destroy your universe as you know it!”

Stan’s expression darkened. “Where do you think we are?”

Stanford opened his mouth to respond to that, staring at Stan with wide eyes. Then he looked around at the long, black hallway that they were walking through, catching sight of a window that opened out to the red sky outside and the multicolored “X” that tore straight through it. “Oh no…no no no no no!” He tried to dig his heels into the smooth stone floor, twisting his body in an attempt to get out of Ford’s grip, but Ford wasn’t about to let go so easily. “You may have given up on saving your universe, but I still can save mine and prevent this from happening to any other universe! Let me go!”

Ford said nothing in response, instead shifting his grip from Stanford’s arm to his shoulder and pushing even harder in order to keep Stanford moving in the direction of the prison cells in the Fearamid.

“Why won’t you let me face our common enemy?!” Stanford roared. His voice broke a little, which was the only hint at the fact that Stanford was probably more terrified than anything else at the moment. “You tried to beat him before, didn’t you?! You have to know of a way that could possibly—“

“Enough,” Ford growled, kicking his counterpart in the backs of his knees and sending him crashing to the floor before planting a foot on his back to keep Stanford from getting up. “Stanley, we’re here.”

“Yeah, I could have guessed,” Stan grumbled as he looked at the black steel bars that made up the doors of the cells that lined the hall. “Does it matter which one we put him in?”

“The Master simply said to put him in one and keep an eye on him; he didn’t specify as to where.”

Stan grunted, then grabbed the door on his left and pulled it open all the way. “Stick him in this one, then.”

Ford reached down and pulled Stanford to his feet again, noting that his counterpart was still struggling, but his movements were weaker and more sluggish than they had been. Obviously, Stanford’s exhaustion was catching up with him.

As a result, Ford was forced to drag Stanford into his cell, where Stanley grabbed the chain that connected the manacles on Stanford’s wrists and hung them up on a hook that happened to be conveniently sticking out of the wall, high enough above Stanford’s head that he wouldn’t be able to unhook the chain so easily.

Stan ended up taking it a step further by bending the hook into a near ring-like shape. He then stepped back and looked down at where Stanford was slumped on the floor.

“So, this is what we’re reduced to, huh?” Stan looked at Ford as he motioned to the slightly-dazed Stanford in front of them. “Letting other Ciphers do who knows what to other yous?”

Ford’s ears drooped a little at that, but it was a hardly noticeable movement. “Certainly seems that way.”

Stan scowled. “’Seems’ nothing. We’re bein’ turned inta a glorified delivery service and you know it.”

“And do you really expect me to question that?” Ford’s eyes narrowed as his twin tails lashed behind him. “After what the Master _last_ ordered me?”

“Question him _aloud,_ no. In your head, maybe.” Stan walked over and poked Ford in the chest, his scowl turning into more of a glare. “Aren’t science-y types like you supposed to question everything?”

Ford pushed his brother’s hand away. “Not anymore. The Master isn’t making use of me for science, I’m sure you’ve noticed that. And if that’s what he intends to do with me, then that’s it.”

“That’s it?” Stan repeated, balking. “Yer jus’ givin’ up? Just like that?”

Ford’s ears flicked back a little. “I’d like to see you try to come up with other options.” He moved outside of the cell and took up a position next to the door, moving his hands behind his back and clasping his elbows.

Stan followed him out and shut the door of the cell behind them. “You could hold onto yer anger at ‘im.”

“And what would the point of that be?” Ford frowned at Stan, irritated.

“Well, it shows ya don’ like yer situation, fer one thing. An’ fer another it’ll keep yer head on straight an’ help ya hold onta the fact that yer still human—“

“But we’re _not._ ”

Stan frowned at Ford. “So?”

Ford sighed and shook his head, then turned his attention to the empty cell on the other side of the hall. “The Master said we’re less than nothing to him. He even changed us so that we can’t claim to still _be_ human. We may still appear that way, but we’re not. You _eat_ those you would have once called your ‘fellow man’.”

Stan shifted uncomfortably at that, but he said nothing.

Ford sighed again and bowed his head, shaking it slightly. “All we can do is obey the Master’s orders. There’s nothing else for us.”

Stan opened his mouth to respond to that, then paused. His brow furrowed. Then he shook his head and leaned back against the wall on the other side of the cell door, folding his arms across his chest. “Well, if that’s how you wanna deal with it, then fine. I’m not plannin’ on lettin’ go, though.”

Ford didn’t answer. He didn’t even so much as flinch when his counterpart started yelling at him again through the cell door.

“Coward!” Stanford yelled. “Where’s your conviction to defeat him? Where’s your sense of humanity?!”

 _Gone,_ Ford could have said. _Along with my willpower and any choice I might have had in my fate._

Instead, he said nothing, simply closing his eyes and taking the verbal barrage, letting it slide over him and drudge up memories of his own time in the portal. Something in him tried to cause his eyes to water in response to his memories of his stubbornness, his determination.

In response, Ford only pushed them down, deeper into himself, mentally locking them away and leaving him feeling cold, hollow, and empty.

Stan saw the emotion drain from Ford’s face, eyes widening, and he quickly turned to look away from him and glared at the wall on the opposite side of the hallway, thoughts burning with fury.

_This guy’s gonna get what he deserves for doing this to us. I’m sure of it._


	12. Spreading Out

Ford didn’t bother to attempt to keep track of the amount of time that passed between when he took his position as guard and when Dipper came down the hall from the throne room with a nervous expression.

“The Master found him,” Dipper said. “He wants him brought back to the throne room.” He pointed at Stanford, who had fallen asleep after screaming at Ford and Stan until his voice had given out.

Ford gave a slight nod at that, then looked over at Stan and waited for him to open the cell door.

Stan noticed the look Ford was giving him and rolled his eyes and snorted before grabbing the metal grate and pushing it open. The noise caused Stanford to stir slightly in response as Stan and Ford stepped into the cell.

Stan unbent the hook that was keeping Stanford’s manacles in place, then grabbed one arm while Ford grabbed the other, and they pulled Stanford to his feet.

Stanford groaned and lifted his head weakly, blinking blearily as Stan and Ford dragged him out of the cell. Dipper’s eyes widened when he saw the man, but he didn’t say anything about his appearance. Instead, Dipper just turned and started down the hall ahead of them, Stan and Ford following after him with Stanford as the man started to come to his senses.

“Whe-where are you taking me?” Stanford asked, lifting up his head and looking between Ford and Stan with a determined glare.

Ford didn’t answer; he saw Stan send him a look from over Stanford’s head, but said nothing. Neither did Dipper.

Stanford started struggling weakly against Ford and Stan’s grips as they re-entered the throne room. Dipper quickly moved across the room to join Mabel at the foot of the Master’s throne as two triangles turned their attention towards them.

 _“THERE HE IS!”_ The Master came off his throne and hovered over, followed shortly by a slightly smaller triangle who glowed more of a soft yellow-white than the Master’s glaring, pure yellow. _“THAT SHOULD BE YOUR FORDSY, AM I RIGHT?”_

 _“LOOKS LIKE IT!”_ The smaller triangle came down in front of Ford, Stanford, and Stan, eyeing the prisoner in the middle. _“YOU REALLY SHOULDN’T WANDER IN THE MULTIVERSE, FORDSY. WHO KNOWS WHAT KINDS OF TROUBLE YOU COULD GET YOURSELF INTO!”_

Stanford tried to pull back, but Ford and Stan both had a tight grip on his arms. He gritted his teeth in anger. “Cipher! Why you—“

_“THREE ANGLES MAKES A NINCOMPOOP IGNORAMAGON!!!”_

Ford _jolted_ in surprise at the sound of the voice, his eyes widening out of surprise as his ears swiveled to find the source of the voice – a teenage _girl_ ’s shout, by the sound of it.

Stan turned his head sharply as the two triangles stiffened and quickly whirled around to face the source’s voice as Dipper and Mabel leapt to their feet.

Ford turned his head a moment later to follow their gazes.

_“Pbbbbbbth! HA!”_

The glimmering blue portal that had appeared far above their heads collapsed in on itself as what sounded like uproarious laughter came from the other side.

Ford blinked in confusion, but his face remained passive as he and the others stared at where the noise had come from.

 _“…WELL THAT WAS ODD,”_ the Master finally commented. _“YOU DON’T HAPPEN TO HAVE ANYONE PLAYING WITH PORTAL GENERATORS IN YOUR DIMENSION, DO YOU?”_

The other Cipher moved back and forth in what would have been a shake of the head, had he been human. _“NOPE. FORDSY’S MY TICKET INTO THE NEXT DIMENSION OVER, REMEMBER?”_ He looked back down at Ford. _“SO, WHO WAS THE GUY WHO FOUND HIM?”_

 _“YOU KNOW, I FORGOT TO ASK FORDSY ABOUT THAT,”_ the Master commented. _“DID YOU GET A NAME, FORDSY?”_

“And a home dimension,” Ford confirmed.

_“AND THEY ARE….?”_

“The slaver who had captured my counterpart introduced himself as Baron from Dimension 64+, Master.”

 _“EXCELLENT!”_ The other Cipher clapped his hands together. _“I’LL SEND HIM HIS REWARD AS SOON AS I GET SETTLED IN. WHICH SHOULDN’T TAKE TOO LONG, SINCE TIME IS NON-EXISTENT IN THE NIGHTMARE REALM!”_ He grabbed Stanford by his hair and pulled him up and out of Stan’s and Ford’s hands, causing him to let out a yell of pain in response. _“I’D GET THAT THING THAT JUST HAPPENED TAKEN CARE OF AS SOON AS POSSIBLE, THOUGH. THAT DIDN’T SOUND LIKE A FORD, BUT THAT PORTAL DEFINITELY LOOKED LIKE SOMETHING OF HIS. DON’T WANT ANY FORDS COMING IN HERE AND DISRUPTING ANYTHING!”_

“Let me go!” Stanford grabbed at Cipher’s hand and tried to get the fingers out of his hair.

 _“NOPE! YOU’RE A BIT TOO FRAGILE TO GO ANYWHERE, BUDDY! HOW ABOUT I PUT YOU TO SLEEP INSTEAD?”_ Cipher snapped the fingers of his other hand under Stanford’s nose, conjuring up a deep red bubble that hid Stanford from sight, the six-fingered sigil appearing on its side. The dream demon casually bounced the sphere from one hand to the other. _“WHELP, I’D BETTER GET BACK TO MY DIMENSIONAL CONQUEST! CATCH YA ON THE FLIP SIDE!”_ With that, Cipher vanished.

 _“HMMM.”_ The Master tapped below his eye thoughtfully as Ford and Stan remained standing where they were; Ford waiting for his orders with a guarded expression that bordered on the emotionless. _“WHAT DO YOU THINK, FORDSY?”_

“About what, Master?”

 _“THE PORTAL THAT APPEARED UP THERE FIVE SECONDS AGO, YOU THICK-SKULLED MORON.”_ The Master flickered red for a moment, his voice dropping an octave in anger.

Ford’s ears flicked back, then settled forward into their usual position. “I doubt that it was any one of my counterparts, Master. The portal was far too small for the machine that I built in my lab at your instruction, and it looked too much like a reflecting mirror of some kind. The portal also appeared to be too stable to have allowed you access to that dimension, if you so desired, and the voice on the other side did not sound like a counterpart of mine. I doubt that I would have ever acted so childish at any point in my past, especially if I was of the opposite gender in that dimension.”

_“ALL GOOD POINTS. BUT THAT DOESN’T TELL ME WHO YOU THINK IT MIGHT BE.”_

Ford shrugged. “My guess is as good as yours, Master. I haven’t met anyone that could make that voice familiar to me on my travels.”

_“AND THE REST OF YOU?”_

“Don’t recognize it,” Stan muttered.

Dipper and Mabel shook their heads as well.

 _“HM. WELL, OBVIOUSLY WHOEVER THAT WAS KNEW ME, SO SOMETHING’S DEFINITELY UP.”_ The Master frowned at the place where the portal had been, high near the apex of the ceiling of the throne room. _“THIS IS BOTHERING ME SO MUCH THAT THINKING OF GOING AND CAUSING EVEN MORE CHAOS IN THIS UNIVERSE ISN’T DISTRACTING ME ENOUGH!”_

Ford blinked at that. He couldn’t think of any reason why the Master would be so concerned about this. He had defeated them; he had them enslaved to this will. Ford couldn’t see why a girl who had yelled an insult into their dimension could possibly be all that much of a threat.

The Master looked over at Ford and frowned. _“WHAT, FORDSY? DO YOU HAVE AN OPINION ON THIS?”_

“How much of a danger would this girl be to you, Master, if you defeated the only group of people that could have defeated you in the first place?” Ford responded.

Stan made a noise that sounded like a half-growl, half-choke.

The Master paused at that. After a moment, he bobbed up and down a little in a nod. _“YEAH. YEAH, YOU DO HAVE A POINT THERE. THIS DIMENSION IS MINE, ISN’T IT? ANYONE ELSE WOULD FIND IT ABSOLUTELY IMPOSSIBLE TO BEAT ME!”_ He laughed loudly. _“I’LL LOOK INTO THAT THING WITH THE PORTAL LATER. FOR NOW, I THINK I WANT TO SEE YOU FOUR GO OUT AND CAUSE SOME DESTRUCTION! WEIRDMAGEDDON’S SPREAD OUT TO A COUPLE OF INTERESTING PLANETS THAT LOOK LIKE THEY HAVE SOME FORM OF LIFE – I DON’T SEE WHY WE CAN’T GO OUT THERE AND CAUSE SOME CHAOS!”_

The Master snapped his fingers, and instantly the Fearamid became a whirl of color that transformed into something else: a planet with earth the color of lavender, and a familiar red sky high above their heads, but no rift in sight. Skyscrapers made of some kind of reflective crystal rose high into the sky in the distance.

Ford looked on all this impassively, his curiosity smothered. Stan, Dipper, and Mabel, however, were clearly startled by the sudden change in scenery.

 _“ALL RIGHT. YOU FOUR HEAD IN THERE AND START CAUSING CHAOS – PILLAGE, DESTROY, WHATEVER. I’M GOING TO WAIT FOR THE RIGHT MOMENT TO POP IN AND REALLY GET THEIR ATTENTION.”_ The Master motioned them towards the city in the distance. _“GO ON! GET GOING!”_

Stan took off instantly, shifting into a black blur with glowing pinpricks of green that appeared more numerous than when Ford had last seen him shift to his changeling state. Mabel unfurled her wings and slipped her arms under Dipper’s, and the two of them took off towards the city after Stan.

Ford readied himself for only a moment, then took off at a dead sprint across what seemed to be a desert of purple towards the city on the horizon. Despite this, he wasn’t as fast as Mabel’s flying or Stan in his changeling form, and, as a result, ended up falling far behind.

Ford gritted his teeth a little and pushed himself to move more quickly. He wasn’t about to fall behind when the Master had ordered _all_ of them to cause chaos.

_“YOU KNOW, FORDSY, SOMETIMES I’VE FOUND THAT FOUR LEGS ARE BETTER THAN TWO.”_

Ford almost tripped over his own feet as he skidded to a stop at the Master’s voice. He looked up as the Master moved into his line of sight.

 _“YOU AREN’T HUMAN ANYMORE, REMEMBER? START BRANCHING OUT AND USING THOSE OTHER INSTINCTS OF YOURS.”_ The Master cupped Ford’s chin in one hand, turning his head this way and that a little. _“I KNOW YOU HAVE THEM. YOU JUST HAVEN’T LET THEM OUT YET.”_ He let his hand drop from Ford’s head, causing it to dip a little. _“THINK ABOUT IT – FOUR LEGS IS BETTER THAN TWO IF YOU REALLY WANT TO KEEP UP.”_

The Master vanished from sight, leaving Ford standing alone with his thoughts as they whirled at the Master’s words.

_Four legs are better than two…does that mean…?_

Ford eased slowly down into a crouch, ears twitching as he placed his hands on the lavender-colored, rocky earth under his feet. He closed his eyes and breathed in slowly, peeling away his human instincts and focusing on the more animalistic ones that the Master had mentioned.

_Four legs are better than two._

Ford felt his body shift as he focused on those words, on the feeling that was building in his chest as his center of gravity shifted upwards. His legs shortened, and he could feel his clothes changing to _fur_ as his hands shrank down, his fingers compressing closer together into a more paw-like shape.

Ford shook his head as the transformation took over his face, pulling his mouth and nose forward with a slight feeling of pins and needles and making the weight of his glasses disappear from his face as he opened his eyes.

He didn’t even bother to pause to look at himself more closely. He simply bolted.

The Master had been right; four legs _were_ faster than two. Ford was able to reach the edge of the city within what probably would have been a shorter amount of time than if he had been running in his human form – had time still existed. Regardless, he still reached the city far later than Stan, Dipper, and Mabel, if the loud screaming from the alien creatures here – light pink, spindly beings with long fingers and no visible nostrils to be spoken of – was any indication.

One of the aliens running out of the city caught sight of Ford as he slowed his approach, causing the alien to come to a sudden stop and stare at Ford in alarm.

 _“Death has come for us!”_ the creature shrieked, scrambling back and falling onto the hood of what appeared to be a hovercar. _“Death himself has come for us!”_

Ford’s ear twitched, and he bared his teeth before lunging forward, embedding his fangs into the alien’s leg as the other aliens near him screamed even louder in alarm as the alien’s leg cracked in Ford’s jaw. Golden ichor spewed up from the wound, filling Ford’s mouth with a coppery taste.

Ford spat the leg out as the alien trembled, and he leapt up at the creature’s face and snapped his jaw shut around the other’s neck, ending his life abruptly.

 _“Death has come for us!”_ another alien screamed as Ford leapt off the hovercar vehicle and turned to face the small group that had stopped in alarm as soon as they had spotted him. _“Our world is doomed!”_

Ford snarled, then lunged again, catching another alien as the rest of the group scattered, either going back into the city or fleeing out into the desert that Ford and his family had come from. His teeth once again broke bone as he bit down on an arm, and he absently noted that these aliens were _extremely_ fragile. Either that, or his jaw strength had increased to the point that the aliens simply seemed to be that way.

He didn’t give himself time to consider asking about their bone structures or testing his newfound strength against the materials on this world. He simply launched himself after the aliens who had escaped from him, following the trail they left behind in search of more aliens to injure, kill, or confuse. His tails lashed, throwing waves of fire in his wake and destroying vehicles, downed bodies, and whatever other alien objects that were common to this world.

The screaming continued, and Ford felt himself drawn toward a particular section of the city; a tugging sensation at his neck informed him as to why.

Ford changed direction, leaping over a barricade of turned over vehicles and nearly landing on top of a small group of the small, spindly aliens.

Ford and the aliens stood across from each other for a moment, Ford sizing the aliens up as they stared at him in fear. Then the tugging became more insistent, and he snarled and leapt forward and over the small aliens, who screamed and scattered as Ford bolted up the street. He caught sight of the Master’s form hiding behind the skyscrapers ahead of him, one finger beckoning him forward.

Within minutes, Ford had broken out of the buildings and arrived in a large, circular plaza. The Master was hovering in the center of it, appearing impatient.

 _“THERE YOU ARE,”_ the Master said as Ford trotted into the center of the plaza and came to a stop in front of him. _“TAKING ADVANTAGE OF YOUR NEWFOUND FAME, FORDSY?”_

Ford wasn’t exactly sure what the Master had meant by that at first, but then remembered how the aliens had screamed and bolted at his presence, and he nodded.

The Master laughed. _“EXCELLENT, EXCELLENT_ _! I KNEW I MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE IN YOUR TRANSFORMATION! YOU CAN GO AHEAD AND SWITCH BACK NOW.”_

Ford closed his eyes and focused on his human form, and felt his body shift again. Within moments, he was on one knee in front of the Master, head bowed, tails resting limply on the ground behind him.

_“THERE’S A GOOD PET. AND LOOK – MY OTHER PUPPETS ARE COMING, TOO! EXCELLENT.”_

Ford lifted his head at the Master’s statement, and caught sight of Stan, Dipper, and Mabel coming into the square from three other directions. They didn’t seem surprised that Ford had gotten there first, or if they were, they hid it well.

 _“I’M GONNA HAVE YOU FOUR CAUSE HAVOC AROUND HERE UNTIL EVERYTHING FALLS APART,”_ the Master said as his eye crinkled into a smile. _“THESE GUYS LOOK LIKE THEY’RE GOING TO BE A LOT MORE FUN THAN THOSE FLESHBAGS FROM YOUR PLANET, THAT’S FOR SURE! FEZ, PINE TREE, SHOOTING STAR, YOU KNOW THE DRILL.”_

The three nodded in response.

_“FORDSY, YOU’VE ALREADY GOT SOME MYTH FROM THESE GUYS ON YOUR SIDE. SO LET’S SEE HOW MUCH CHAOS YOU CAN CAUSE BY RUNNING AROUND AND GETTING THE JUMP ON THE ONES THAT TRY TO RUN FROM MY OTHER PUPPETS! AND DON’T—“_

Something flashed from the sky above them, cutting the Master’s instructions off. He blinked a couple times, then turned and looked up.

Ford looked up as well, the rest of his family mimicking his movement and focusing on the sky above them.

A white shockwave was shooting across the sky, causing a rippling after-effect that left the space beyond clear and purely black for a moment before stars started coming back…but it felt as though they were coming back in the _wrong places._

Ford felt a chill run down his spine as the shockwave spread further, causing more rippling after-effects in the stars of the sky before it disappeared on the horizon.

The square was silent for a moment, but then cries went up from the connecting streets, causing Ford’s ears to twitch and swivel as he tracked the sounds.

 _“WHEW! I WAS WORRIED FOR A SECOND THERE!”_ The Master laughed. _“MUST’VE BEEN SOME IDIOT WHO HIT THE COSMIC RESET BUTTON! I HOPE THAT THEY GOT WHAT THEY DESERVED FOR DOING THAT!”_

Ford blinked. _Cosmic reset button…?_

 _“IT’S NOT EVERY CENTURY THAT WE SEE A SO-CALLED ‘WORLD JUMPER’ CAUSE SOME KIND OF MULTIVERSAL DISTURBANCE. I NEVER THOUGHT I’D SEE ANOTHER ONE OF THOSE IDIOTS TRY TO RESET AN ENTIRE DIMENSIONAL TIMELINE. LOOKS LIKE A BIG ONE, TOO!”_ The Master laughed. _“GET GOING, YOU FOUR! I WANT TO HEAR MORE SCREAMS AND SEE THEM COME PLEADING TO ME FOR SAFETY!”_

The four Pines instantly scattered, back into the city. Moments later, fireballs caused multiple cars to explode as Ford made his mark on the place, burning aliens and sending them flying into buildings, causing bones to break like glass. The terror of the screams that rose up were only matched in intensity by the sound of the Master cackling over the city, arms raised up above him as thunder and lightning crashed down, hitting buildings and setting them ablaze.

Within minutes, the entire city was in chaos.


	13. Strange Dealings

The Master grew bored of the alien worlds of their dimension rather quickly after his initial arrival on each one. Ford wasn’t sure whether it was because the aliens had no resistance force or because the aliens ran screaming as soon as they caught sight of them.

The Master conjured up a number of creatures to keep his authority in his place on the planets, then collected his puppets and returned to his throne room, bored.

Only for something else to catch his attention.

 _“HOW DID YOU GET IN HERE?”_ The Master coldly eyed the two creatures that were standing in his throne room. _“I DON’T RECALL LEAVING THE FEARAMID OPEN FOR PEOPLE LIKE YOU TO WANDER IN AS YOU PLEASE.”_

 ** _“We informed your servants that we were requesting a deal with you.”_** One of the two black-cloaked figures in the center of the throne room gave a slight bow. **_“And we speak the truth in that.”_**

Ford suppressed a shudder. There was something _wrong_ about the voice of this creature. It scraped and flowed over him like a landslide and oil at the same time, and the sensation did _not_ feel like it should exist.

Indeed, there was a chance that the aliens _themselves_ should not exist. Something warped and moved around them that made their edges blurred, not quite constant.

 _“DO YOU, NOW?”_ The Master arranged the Pines in front of his throne: Dipper and Ford on his right, Stan and Mabel on his left. _“I WAS UNDER THE IMPRESSION THAT DARK ARMS LIKE YOURSELVES DIDN’T_ DO _DEALS.”_

Dark Arms? These creatures had strange, curling dark horns rising up over hooded heads and sharp beaks and glowing red eyes that could be seen from under the hoods. Ford wasn’t sure where the name came from, but he wasn’t quite sure that it fit these creatures entirely.

He wasn’t about to question that now though. He wasn’t required to.

 ** _“Desperate times call for desperate measures,”_** the first rasped in reply. **_“We have had some…difficulty with a certain project. The project has learned to avoid and destroy any mark we make on a dimension. We wish to have it brought back under our power.”_**

Ford’s ears twitched.

The old scientist in him attempted to stir, but it was quickly crushed. The Master hasn’t asked for him to question; what use did he have of silently asking himself questions?

The Master laughed. _“WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I SHOULD BE INTERESTED?”_

**_“The project goes by Fire Storm and has access to the Continuum Shift. She has trapped us in a loop in time and could do the same to you.”_ **

The Master stopped laughing, but his eye was still crinkled up in amusement. _“DO YOU REALLY THINK THAT SOMETHING LIKE THAT CAN AFFECT ME? TIME DOESN’T EXIST HERE!”_

**_“That will not matter to a World Jumper.”_ **

Ford’s ears twitched. This was the first he’d heard of such a thing as a World Jumper. His mind raced through conclusions without his permission: the name suggested that the person was capable of traveling between dimensions, or at least between planets….

 _“LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT. YOU WANT A WORLD JUMPER THAT SCREWED YOU OVER.”_ The Master’s eye flicked through a number of different visions – other dimensions, perhaps? Ford couldn’t get a clear view of them, and he wasn’t about to turn his head around completely in order to get a better look. _“WHY COME TO ME?”_

 ** _“Because you have found a way to keep your servants obedient.”_** The Dark Arms looked down at Ford, who didn’t meet the alien’s gaze. **_“We require that knowledge in order to bring Fire Storm under our power properly.”_**

 _“HMMM….”_ The Master tapped below his eye. _“SOUNDS LIKE AN UNEVEN DEAL. YOU WANT A BOUNTY ON THIS KID AND WHAT I DID TO MY PUPPETS, BUT WHAT DO I GET FROM YOU IN RETURN?”_

The Dark Arms looked at each other solemnly at the question. Ford and his family said nothing, watching the visitors in case the Master decided not to take the deal and instead use the creatures for target practice.

 ** _“We will owe you a favor,”_** the first Dark Arms rasped. **_“Will that suffice?”_**

The Master said nothing for a moment. _“A BIG FAVOR.”_

**_“Cipher—“_ **

_“BECAUSE THIS IS NOT SOMETHING SMALL YOU ARE ASKING FOR. IF YOU’RE STUCK IN A LOOP, THAT WILL HAVE TO BE BROKEN FOR YOU TO GET THIS ‘FIRE STORM’. YOU’RE GOING TO BE IN MY DEBT UNTIL YOU’RE DEAD.”_

**_“Or_ you’re _dead,”_** pointed out the second Dark Arms. The first elbowed him in the gut.

The Master burst out laughing. _“ME? DEAD? UNLESS YOU’RE THREATENING ME, THAT’S NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN.”_ His eye narrowed. _“IS IT?”_

 ** _“No,”_** the first Dark Arms replied – possibly a little too quickly, but Ford wasn’t about to feel suspicious of them. He wasn’t required to; therefore, he felt nothing. **_“We wouldn’t dare to suggest that you have an end.”_** He shot his companion a pointed look, then looked back at the Master. **_“Your assistance and knowledge in exchange for a favor you can call in over us at any time. We accept this deal.”_**

 _“IT’S NOT OFFICIAL UNTIL WE SHAKE ON IT!”_ The Master held out a hand, which burst into blue flames.

The Dark Arms hesitated at the sight of the fire, then reached out with a claw and grasped the Master’s hand. The deal was made.

 _“NOW GET OUT OF MY SIGHT.”_ The Master settled back in the throne and motioned for the two aliens to leave. _“GO ON. YOU’VE GOT NOTHING ELSE OF INTEREST TO ME.”_

The Dark Arms exchanged looks, then retreated from the throne room.

 _“I DON’T SEE WHY THOSE BOZOS ARE SO WORRIED ABOUT THIS ‘FIRE STORM.’”_ The Master snorted. _“SERIOUSLY, THEY’RE PROBABLY JUST A MORTAL MEATSACK WHO’S IN OVER THEIR HEAD AND ONLY WON AGAINST THEM THROUGH DUMB LUCK. PHEH. STILL, THOUGH, THAT DEAL WASN’T A WASTE OF TIME. I GOT ANOTHER ALIEN RACE IN DEBT TO ME.”_ The Master chuckled to himself.

Ford closed his eyes. _Fire Storm…_ whoever it was, he supposed there was a greater chance of him running into them now, if they were spotted. Much like the counterparts of himself he was now charged to collect, so too would he find this one and bring them in.

It was now simply a matter of them showing their face.

_“OOP! LOOKS LIKE WE GOT ANOTHER ONE!”_

Ford opened his eyes at the Master’s teasing tone and blinked when he saw the blue-skinned troll from before making his way into the throne room, dragging a battered and knocked-out Stanford behind him. This one looked like he had been around the multiverse for a good number of years – his hair was only starting to turn gray.

His counterpart also happened to be unconscious.

“Picked this one up a few dimensions over.” The troll threw Ford’s counterpart down in front of the throne, causing the man to groan in response. “He was already pretty knocked around, so I figured I’d knock him out and drag ‘im here so you could find where he’s supposed to go.”

 _“I COULD HAVE JUST SENT FORDSY TO YOU TO PICK HIM UP AND DROP OFF THE REWARD LATER. I’VE ALREADY DONE THAT FOR A FEW OTHER ONES.”_ The Master motioned with one hand, causing Ford’s counterpart to levitate up to eye-height. A snap of his fingers healed any wounds the human had, and the Master poked Ford’s counterpart in the head with a finger. _“THERE WE GO…WAIT.”_ The Master’s eye narrowed. _“THIS ONE IS – **WHAT IS THIS?!”**_

Ford’s ears quickly moved down as the Master’s normal volume increased into a low roar of anger.

 _“THIS ONE DOESN’T HAVE A ME WHO MARKED HIM!”_ The Master turned his attention sharply to the bounty hunter, who had the instincts to flinch back as the Master turned red. _“THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE! THERE’S NO WAY THAT – OH. **OH.**_ ” The Master’s eye flickered, and he jolted back to yellow. _“BUT THAT’S – SHE SHOULD BE DEAD BY NOW, NOT –“_

“Who?” The troll quickly recovered himself. “Can I go after her to get the bounty this guy would have—“

The Master burst out laughing. _“HA! AS AMUSING AS IT WOULD BE TO SEE YOU TRY, NO. I STILL NEED YOU TO KEEP UP YOUR END OF THE BARGAIN. I’LL TAKE CARE OF HER IN MY OWN WAY; YOU JUST KEEP WORRYING ABOUT COLLECTING FORDS.”_

“And this one?” The troll motioned to Ford’s counterpart, who was still floating in the air by the Master’s power, unconscious.

 _“I’LL WORRY ABOUT HIM. GO ON, SHOO.”_ The Master motioned for the troll to get out of the throne room, which he did – reluctantly. As soon as the troll was gone the Master snapped his fingers, encasing Ford’s counterpart in a maroon bubble with a six-fingered sigil on the side. _“NOW TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS ONE….”_

_“Hey, buddy! Think ya got a free moment?”_

Ford’s ears twitched. The voice sounded like the Master’s, but it had less volume to it – must be a counterpart.

 _“YEAH, SURE!”_ The Master brightened instantly. _“GET IN HERE!”_

Another triangle – slightly smaller, with a tinge of orange to his edges – floated into the room with his eye upturned in a crinkled smile.

The Cipher whistled. _“Man, I like what you’ve done with this place! It’s nice to see that you’ve managed to settle in!”_

The Master laughed. _“IT’S NICE TO BE SETTLED IN! SO WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE, BUDDY?”_

 _“Well, I heard that you’d managed to get the Pines under your control and—“_ the Cipher cut himself off and pointed at the bubble in the Master’s hand. _“Is that a_ second _Sixer?”_

 _“HUH, THIS? OH, YEAH – APPARENTLY, THIS ONE DOESN’T HAVE A CIPHER LOOKING FOR HIM, SO I’VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT WHAT I COULD DO WITH HIM.”_ The Master bounced the sphere from hand to hand, not really paying attention to the shadow of the figure trapped inside. _“SINCE I’VE ALREADY GOT A FORD AND ALL. IT MIGHT BE NICE TO HAVE ANOTHER ONE, BUT I DON’T WANT TO DEAL WITH TWO OF THEM WHEN THE ONE I HAVE IS MORE THAN ENOUGH OF A HANDFUL.”_ The Master turned his eye to Ford, who lowered his eyes to the floor.

_“I think I know a Cipher who might like another one.”_

_“OH?”_

_“Yeah; one of us caught a Crescent when he was coming through the portal.”_ The Cipher let out a laugh. _“He’s got him working as a bounty hunter for Fords now, can you believe that? He hasn’t caught any yet, though – I bet he’d like someone to practice a few techniques on, if you know what I mean.”_

_“OH, I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU MEAN. WHICH NIGHTMARE REALM’S HE AT?”_

Ford heard the other Cipher give a set of dimensional coordinates, and the Master laughed again.

_“THAT ONE, HUH? I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN HE’D PULL SOMETHING LIKE THAT! I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN HIS FORD GETS CAUGHT BY HIS OWN BROTHER! HA!”_

Had Ford felt more himself, a chill would have run down his spine at the thought of his own brother hunting him down. However, as he and Stan were both serving the Master, he knew that wasn’t going to happen.

 _“Y’KNOW, IF THERE ARE DIMENSIONS WITHOUT CIPHERS, I WONDER….”_ The Master trailed off thoughtfully. _“HAVING JUST ONE DIMENSION LIKE THIS IS BORING, AND IT’S GOING TO START LOSING SUBSTANCE WHEN MY WEIRDNESS HITS THE EDGES OF THIS DIMENSION. WHAT DO YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN IF I REACHED OUT FOR OTHER DIMENSIONS?_ ”

Stan shifted on the other side of the throne, but his movement was slight enough that Ford’s ears only twitched in his direction.

 _“Other dimensions?”_ The other Cipher sounded thoughtful. Then he laughed. _“That sounds like a great idea! There have got to be more dimensions that we can liberate out there than just this one! But how do you expect to do it?”_

 _“OH, I HAVE A FEW…_ IDEAS. _”_ The Master sounded like he knew what he was doing. _“TAKE OUR ALTERNATE THIS LITTLE SIXER AS A ‘GIFT’ FOR HIS NEW PET TO CHEW ON. I AM GOING TO SET MINE TO WORK.”_

 _“And how do you know I’m not going to take this one for myself?”_ the other Cipher retorted.

_“LET’S JUST SAY…I HAVE MY WAYS.”_

There was a moment of silence at that, and then a flash of power – the other Cipher had made his escape from their dimension.

 _“I’M GOING TO BE OUT DIMENSION-SHOPPING,”_ the Master announced. _“STAY HERE UNTIL I GET BACK.”_

And then he too was gone.

**Another Time, Another Place**

“I’m going to try something.”

Ford’s ears twitched at the Guildmaster’s voice, and he looked up at where she stood in the middle of the Mystery Shack’s living room.

“What are you gonna do?” Mabel – an _untouched_ Mabel, not Ford’s own great-niece – looked at the Guildmaster with a curious expression.

“I want to see if I can rescue these guys earlier in their timeline.” The Guildmaster cracked her knuckles together. “If they can be rescued with less damage from that triangular beastie than they have now, they would definitely be better off.”

Ford blinked, his expression remaining blank and unchanged when she looked over at him.

“Are you suggesting that you can time travel?” A version of him in the appearance of a sphinx looked at the Guildmaster from where he was laying on the floor. Mabel – Ford’s actual niece, not a counterpart – was sitting next to him, appearing nervous.

“People like me do that all the time traveling between dimensions, since the rate of time is different in each one.” The Guildmaster made a slight waving motion, as though she could clear the doubt from the room. “If I get it right, I bet I can punch a hole through space and time in order to go back to some point in the past when they’d be faster to recover.” She looked around the room. “Any objections to me trying?”

A second version of Ford sitting in a chair across the room from him – still human, as Ford had been before his transformation – rose to his feet and pulled a blaster out from under his trench coat. “I don’t see why we can’t attempt it, but you are going to need more weaponry than just what you have equipped.”

“I can summon an army of allies who I am sure would love to tear this guy to pieces.” The Guildmaster grinned, but there was a dark glint of something in her eyes that offset the eagerness she was displaying. “There are a _lot_ of people out in the multiverse that would want a piece of Bill for what he’s done.” She looked around the room at the figures assembled there – both Ford and his family and their counterparts, as well as two young men with bright blond hair that the Guildmaster had introduced as her nephews. “You guys ready to give this a shot?”

“Yeah! Let’s do it!” One of Mabel’s counterparts pulled a grappling hook out from under her sweater and prepared to fire it.

“I’m up for round 2.” Stanley’s counterpart grinned and cracked his knuckles.

The Guildmaster gave a thumbs-up, then motioned at the air in front of her.

A bright crackle of blue lightning flew from the Guildmaster’s fingertips, and a bright blue, circular, _stable_ portal appeared in the middle of the living room.

Ford stiffened. There was something about this that was…oddly familiar, but he couldn’t quite put a finger on what it was.

The Guildmaster started to step into the portal—only for her foot to collide with the circle of energy and not pass through.

“What in Primus…?” The Guildmaster frowned. Then her eyes widened sharply as the portal rippled. “Oh, you have _got_ to be kidding me.”

Mabel’s counterpart started to lower her chosen weapon. “What is it?”

“Their past is a _fixed point in time,_ I can’t go back and _change_ any of it!” The Guildmaster clenched her right fist and slammed it into the circle of energy in front of her, causing it to ripple again as the blue glow faded and became something else.

Ford recognized the walls and floor of the Fearamid’s throne room as soon as he saw them. He could also see the Cipher he once called Master, and there was something else in view of the portal as well, but he could not see them well from where he was sitting.

The Guildmaster gritted her teeth and snarled through them; Ford got the feeling he was going to be used to get her anger out later.

“It was worth a shot,” Stanley’s counterpart said with a shrug.

Ford’s human counterpart sighed and hid his blaster away again. “Indeed it was.”

“There’s still something I can do, though.”

Ford blinked at the Guildmaster’s statement. He saw that her fists were still clenched in anger, but there was a grin on her face now. His ears flicked forward slightly.

“I’ve always wanted to see how Cipher would react to something like this.”

The Guildmaster grinned wickedly and took a deep breath, then shouted into the open portal between this one and the Nightmare Realm. “THREE ANGLES MAKES A NINCOMPOOP IGNORAMAGON!”

Ford sat up ramrod straight as his eyes widened sharply; the figures on the other side of the portal started to turn in order to find the source of the Guildmaster’s voice as the people on this side of the portal stared at the Guildmaster in surprise.

The Guildmaster stuck her tongue out. “Pbbbbbbth! HA!” Then with a flick of her wrist, the portal collapsed in on itself and disappeared from sight.

It took a moment before Ford’s brother recovered from the shock of the Guildmaster’s actions.

“That was you?!” Stan stared at the Guildmaster with wide eyes, jaw dropping in shock before a grin crossed his face. “Do you know how long I’ve been wonderin’ who ta thank fer hearin’ that particular name?”

Ford couldn’t believe what the Guildmaster had just done; he continued to sit stiff as a board, hands clenching the arm-rests of his chair as the color swiftly drained from his face.

_She just – why did – that was her?! That portal – how could she have –_

_Oh. Oh no._

“Maria, that was extremely reckless,” one of the Guildmaster’s nephews said disapprovingly – a tall, young man with blond hair that looked almost white, and a reserved air about him.

“Like I was going to let an opportunity pass me by!” the Guildmaster retorted. “That eldritch monster’s _lucky_ that this thing’s a fixed point in time, or else I would have jumped in there and summoned the Guild and taken him on right then and there! It would have saved us a _lot_ of trouble in the long run, believe me!”

Mabel and Dipper exchanged wide-eyed looks while Stan’s eyebrows shot even higher, half-impressed and half-startled.

Ford’s tails curled around him tightly, ears flicking back against his head. “D-do you realize what you’ve done?”

The Guildmaster turned at Ford’s choked question, her grin fading into an expression of confusion. “What do you mean? Are you talking about the portal thing?” She paused. “Oh, yeah, you guys don’t know – I completely forgot about that. It’s okay, Sixer – I do that all the time. I’m a World Jumper; it’s kinda what I do. I mean, sure I’m called the Fire Storm, but fire’s not the only thing that I mess with.”

That only made Ford even _more_ nervous as his fears were confirmed. The fur on his tails started to rise slowly; he wasn’t sure what the Guildmaster would do when she found out that he had known this and hadn’t informed her. _“They_ arrived not long after this event and placed a bounty on your head. _They_ made a deal with _him.”_

“A bounty?” repeated the other of the Guildmaster’s nephews – a tall young man with his hair sticking up like a broom.

“They who, Sixer?” The Guildmaster’s expression shifted over to a frown. She took a few steps closer to Ford.

He sank down into the chair, expecting to be beaten as soon as he told her. Withholding information of any sort couldn’t have been a good thing. “The, the Dark Arms.” Ford closed his eyes tightly, expecting a near-murderous response from the Guildmaster, and for she to take her anger out on him.

The room went completely silent; Ford could feel the tension in the air as he waited.

“Did they say anything about me thwarting any plan of theirs?”

Ford’s ears raised themselves a little; the Guildmaster was speaking…softly? But there was a serious tone in it as well – she must be holding her anger back until she had all the information she could concerning the matter.

Ford nodded a little. “Yes.”

“Did they mention the Continuum Shift by name?”

Ford nodded again. “Yes.”

“You know about the cosmic reset button?” one of Ford’s counterparts asked in surprise. He guessed it was his human counterpart, since the voice didn’t have an underlying growl to it.

 _That_ phrase was familiar; the Mas – _Cipher_ had used that.

“Yeah,” the Guildmaster replied. “I know how to hit it – I did it when the Dark Arms made a few moves the multiverse didn’t like.” Ford could hear her clenching her teeth. She let out a sigh through her nose. “It’s only a last resort for me, though, and I doubt that hitting it now would be of much help to Sixer and the others.” There was a pause for a moment, and then the Guildmaster said, softly, “Sixer, thank you for telling me about this.”

_Thank you?_

Ford cracked his eyes open a little, confused by the Guildmaster’s word choice. He focused on her face and saw that…there was no anger there. Only…concern, which still didn’t feel right directed at him. “You-you’re not mad?”

“Mad?” The Guildmaster shook her head, then frowned, but there was no malice or anger in her gaze. “I’m not mad at _you_ if that’s what you’re suggesting. You didn’t know who exactly I was to them; it’s not your fault.”

Ford found it ridiculous that the Guildmaster was just brushing this off like nothing. _He_ certainly wouldn’t have.

Ford saw his human counterpart look at him with a worried expression. “Maria, something tells me this is an instinctive response.”

Ford’s tails twitched as the Guildmaster’s brow furrowed even deeper, and she sighed and shook her head.

“Sixer, I’m not going to take my anger at the Dark Arms out on you,” she said. “It wouldn’t be right, and it wouldn’t be healthy for either of us.” She looked at him, mouth pressed into a straight line. “I don’t do that sort of thing, and I don’t ever intend to. You have my word on that.”

Ford blinked, disbelieving. Once again that bitter laugh echoed in his head, just as it had the other times that the Guildmaster had said such a thing – she was not as bound to her word as he was; she could go back on it at any time.

And yet…and yet….

He had only been under her power for a short time and he already saw how different she was from his previous master, how instead of using every means she had to get what she wanted, she assisted others.

She had vowed to give them back their freedom as best as she could, and she had yet to do so, but…some small part of him was starting to wonder if she actually could.

The Guildmaster held out a hand, jolting Ford out of his thoughts and causing him to flinch back, expecting a slap to the face. The Guildmaster winced at his reaction, then kept going forward and placed her hand on his shoulder.

A pulse of warmth – heat, yes, but it felt like there was something else with it as well – spread out from the point of contact and into Ford, causing him to stiffen in surprise at it as he looked at the Guildmaster in wary confusion.

“I am not like Cipher,” the Guildmaster said evenly. “You’re safe here, Sixer. I promise.”

Ford blinked, thrown off by the Guildmaster’s words even as his body relaxed instinctively into the warmth that she was pressing into him. His mind was still…uncertain, of her, and of what it was that she was capable of. But there were some things that were proving her words true. The Guildmaster did not create destruction as his previous master had, and she did not have his temper.

That, and she was….not angered with him.

He had known a word that could have described such a thing, once, but it escaped him now.

Ford sighed and let his body relax completely. The Guildmaster would take some more time yet to get used to, it seemed.


	14. Business As Usual

When the Master returned, he came back with a tenseness that caused Ford to stiffen as one of his tails started to ache.

He hardly had the time to prepare himself before he heard a snap of fingers and his tail ripped itself in two, getting only a short yell of from him as the pain subsided.

The Master laughed, and the tension in the air lightened up a little. _“AH, I NEEDED THAT! NOTHING LIKE A GOOD SCREAM OF PAIN FROM A PET TO GET THE TENSION OUT!_ ”

Ford’s tails spread themselves out a little under his trench coat; now that he had three instead of two, he had to arrange them differently than he had before.

_“BUT THAT ONE DEFINITELY ISN’T ENOUGH.”_

Something pulled on Ford’s collar from behind and lifted him up abruptly into the air, leaving him gagging for breath as he dangled in the middle of the Fearamid, wrists and neck attached to chains that stretched up to the ceiling.

 _“I’M UP FOR SOME OLD NOSTALGIC TORTURE SESSIONS TO GET ME IN A GOOD MOOD.”_ The Master rubbed his hands together, eye crinkled up in an eagerness that should have left Ford feeling a sense of dread.

Now, however, there was only a hollow preparedness. As he couldn’t escape, the best he could do was endure what it was that the Master had planned.

The Master’s fingers sparked with electricity, shooting back and forth between his fingertips as the voltage increased with loud crackles that caused the fur on Ford’s tails to rise because of the static charge alone. The feeling of the electricity coursing through his fur was enough to make them twitch out of discomfort.

The Master’s hands lunged forward, and Ford was caught in the electrical blast. The scream it ripped out of him was quickly coupled with the Master’s crazed laughter of delight. The dissonant noise caused Ford’s ears to slam down against his head in order to block it out as best he could.

However, it was impossible to block out one’s own screaming, and the Master’s laughter cut through everything as Ford screamed himself hoarse.

Eventually, the electricity stopped, leaving Ford to hang limply, burns covering his body and his clothes burned and torn through where the electricity came into contact with him.

The Master snapped his fingers, repairing the burns and the clothes but leaving the pain behind. _“AH, THAT’S BETTER. I SHOULD DO THAT MORE OFTEN – IT’S VERY SOOTHING!”_

Ford said nothing, still trying to catch his breath from the electrical firebrand that was burning in his skin and seeming to melt his insides.

Something flickered across his skin – a rippling aura of some kind that caught the Master’s attention.

 _“OH? SEEMS SOMEONE’S CAUGHT ANOTHER ONE!”_ The Master released Ford from the chains and held the kitsune in one hand. _“GO TO, FORDSY! YOU KNOW THE DRILL!”_

Ford nodded as the world flashed around him, placing him in new surroundings: a large chamber with glass windows looking into other, smaller chambers. Gray metal made up the walls and domed ceiling, but Ford didn’t follow the walls up to see where it was they went.

His eyes were trained on the group standing in front of him.

His counterpart – wearing the black portal garb he once had – shook his head slowly and tried to pull back and away, but the large scaly lizard-creature holding him by the neck kept him from going too far.

The little, short-haired girl with a ragged sweater that had a faded shooting star on the front tried to pull the lizard’s claws from around her neck in order to get away, but his claws only tightened, causing her to cry out.

Ford’s ears flicked back a little at Mabel’s terrified expression as Stanford instantly turned his attention to his niece before glaring at Ford.

“Yer the one, then?” the lizard monster grunted.

Ford gave a curt nod.

“There’s posters out fer ‘em both; Dimension S-D-687. “ The lizard paused. “If he wants ta find me, tell ‘im ta look fer The Collector in the Silvian-Delta Quadrant. He’ll know.”

Ford nodded again, then stepped forward and took hold of the energy leads that were attached to the cuffs on Stanford’s and Mabel’s wrists. The lizard let go of their necks, and the two captured Pines instantly started struggling and pulling back from Ford.

That didn’t save them from being warped to the Fearamid with Ford.

The two of them stopped pulling for a moment, and then Stanford let out a roar and started to pull even more ferociously than he had been before. “No! You can’t be doing this – I refuse to –“

“Grunkle Ford? Wh-what is this?!” Mabel pulled closer to Stanford, nervous and teary-eyed as she looked around at the throne room. She let out a strangled gasp when she saw the banners above the seat of petrified humans. “Wendy! Soos!”

“This is not our dimension,” Stanford snarled. He glared at Ford. “Where have you taken us?!”

 _“RIGHT WHERE YOU NEEDED TO BE, SIXER!”_ The Master was suddenly hovering over the top of them.

“ _You!”_ Mabel looked up at the triangle in fear and anger. “What did you do you dumb triangle?!”

“Mabel,” Stanford hissed.

 _“WELL, FORD OF DIMENSION—“_ The Master fixed his gaze on Ford.

“Dimension S-D-687, Master,” Ford provided. His counterpart stiffened and started turning red in the face while Mabel started to look more and more alarmed by the second.

 _“AH! ONE OF THE DAILY DOUBLES, I SEE! QUITE THE LUCKY CATCH!”_ The Master cackled. _“OTHER ME’S GOING TO BE SO PLEASED!”_

“Other…there are more of you?!” Stanford glared up at the triangle, gritting his teeth in anger.

 _“WELL, THERE’S MORE THAN ONE OF YOU, SO WHAT DO YOU THINK?”_ The Master patted Ford on the head; his expression didn’t so much as twitch at the contact. _“WELL, DRIFTER AND FALLEN STAR, I’D SAY YOU TWO JUST MADE SOMEONE’S LUCKY DAY!”_

“G-grunkle Ford, what’s he talking about?” Mabel squeaked nervously.

 _“TO PUT IT SIMPLY, FALLEN STAR, I’M TURNING YOU IN AS THE MIDDLEMAN FOR A BOUNTY THAT’S ON YOUR HEAD.”_ The Master hooked a finger under Mabel’s chin and lifted it up, eye crinkling in amusement as her expression went wide-eyed and paled with horror. _“YOU’RE GOING TO HELP MY OTHER SELF DO WHAT I’VE DONE WITH THE PLACE! AND I THINK YOU’RE GOING TO LIKE WHAT HE’S GOING TO DO! IN FACT….”_ The Master turned his eye to look at Ford. _“HOW ABOUT I GIVE HIM A LITTLE INSPIRATION? YOU CAN TAKE HIM TO THAT CIPHER. TELL HIM IT’S A GIFT FROM ME. I’LL TAKE CARE OF GIVING THE BOUNTY TO….”_

Ford knew what information the Master wanted. “He called himself the Collector of the Silvian-Delta Quadrant, Master.”

 _“AAAAH. TO LET GO OF A PRIZE SO EASILY MEANS HE WANTS THE BOUNTY EVEN MORE.”_ The Master rubbed his hands together, eye crinkling at the edges devilishly. _“I’LL MAKE SURE THAT THE DELIVERY COMES EXTRA SPECIAL, AFTER YOU’VE SENT THEM ON THEIR WAY.”_

Ford bowed his head, and as he raised it, his world flashed again, changing to another room made of brickwork. There was something…off, about this one, however.

While the brick was black, it was also purple and green and yellow at the same time – swirling together but still separate at the same time and Ford could tell that it was hurting and yet not hurting his eyes to look at.

_“Well well well well well well well well well well well, what have we here?”_

Stanford moved closer to Mabel as Ford turned his head, catching sight of a Cipher, hovering over where the throne had yet to be.

_“Drifter, Fallen Star, and another Fordsy to play with! This must be my lucky day!”_

“I am only here as a messenger, nothing more,” Ford replied. “The Master decided to send you a gift.” He held out the leads attached to the cuffs on his counterpart and Mabel. “He said he would pay the bounty as well.”

Cipher paused to consider that, his body tilting to the side ever so slightly. Then his eye brightened. _“You gave up.”_

Ford bowed his head as Stanford suddenly looked murderous.

“You…you _bastard!”_ Stanford lunged for Ford, holding his cuffs as wide as he possibly could in order to wrap them around Ford’s neck.

Ford wove out of the way with practiced ease and slammed an elbow into his counterpart’s back, sending him slamming to the floor before planting a foot on his back.

Mabel’s eyes were watering – whether from tears or from the pain of looking at the place they were trapped in, Ford neither knew nor cared.

Cipher burst out laughing. _“Excellent! I thought I’d heard that there were some Ciphers who’d gotten into your dimension, but I hadn’t seen the results before! How’d he get you on his side, huh?”_

“I am not allowed to say unless the knowledge is unable to be passed to those who work against the Master.” Ford’s gaze flicked between Stanford and Mabel before looking back at Cipher.

 _“Hm. Well then, in that case.”_ Cipher held out a hand.

Ford handed over the energy leads without hesitation and stepped back from Stanford, allowing Cipher to yank him to his feet and pull Mabel away.

 _“Well, since your position is so intriguing, I’ll put these two aside!”_ Cipher snapped his fingers.

Mabel was in the middle of a scream when she and Stanford were abruptly transformed into sparkling crystal statues made of pink and red hues.

_“So. How did Other Me do it?”_

Ford’s gaze moved from his counterpart and his great-niece to Cipher. “The Master removed the willpower of myself and my family, then transformed us to suit his needs. We are, at present, his puppets, to follow his orders as he chooses.”

There was a moment as that sank in.

_“He did that to….”_

“The four of us.”

Ford might have felt something, once, at saying all this. But now, he was only empty. Three hundred years of serving Cipher, seeing counterparts pass through Cipher’s palace and see worlds in his own dimension fall to Cipher’s whim had changed him.

What was the point in feeling something that he had no use in feeling anymore?

 _“Hmm…interesting, interesting…”_ Cipher steepled his fingers. _“And he wouldn’t feel angry with me if I, say, did the same thing?”_

“The Master sent me as inspiration; I have no say in what you can or cannot do with them.” Ford motioned to the two crystallized humans.

Cipher’s eye brightened in an instant. _“Excellent! In that case, I know exactly what I can do with these two!”_ He motioned with a “shooing” motion. _“Go on, then. I can handle this from here.”_

Ford bowed in response, and when he raised himself up again, he was back in the Master’s Fearamid.

Mabel flashed into view next to him a moment later, looking more forlorn than she had before.

 _“PACKAGES DELIVERED?”_ The Master asked slyly.

“Yes, Master,” Ford and Mabel responded at once.

Ford didn’t see the need to ask what it was that Mabel had just delivered; he could guess, but he didn’t have the permission to.

 _“EXCELLENT, EXCELLENT. YOU BOTH PERFORMED ADMIRABLY.”_ The Master motioned for the two of them to take up their positions in front of his throne. _“NOW, I’VE GOT SOMETHING ELSE IN MIND TO TAKE UP SOME OF YOUR TIME.”_

Ford’s ears twitched towards the Master as he knelt next to Dipper.

_“THIS DIMENSION’S GETTING A BIT TOO TIGHT FOR ME AND THE HENCHMANIACS.”_

_We are less than nothing to him,_ Ford reminded himself. The Master had no reason to include them when speaking of those in his court. They weren’t Henchmaniacs, they were…less than that. Far less.

_“SO I AM GOING TO USE YOU TO LIBERATE ANOTHER DIMENSION AND ADD IT TO THE PARTY!”_

Ford saw Stan stiffen on the other side of the throne.

 _“IT’S NOT GOING TO BE ANOTHER DIMENSION LIKE YOURS, OBVIOUSLY – MY OTHER MES ARE GOING TO WANT THOSE LEFT ALONE. CAN’T HAVE MORE THAN ONE SET OF PINES PER CIPHER.”_ The Master chuckled darkly. _“IF SHE KEEPS DOING WHAT SHE’S BEEN DOING, THOUGH, THAT MIGHT CHANGE.”_

Ford had no desire to ask who “she” was.

 _“NOW, I CAN’T GO TO OTHER DIMENSIONS BECAUSE THE NIGHTMARE REALM DOESN’T EXACTLY LET ME HAVE A PHYSICAL FORM ANYMORE. THAT DOESN’T MEAN THAT YOU’VE LOST YOURS, BUT YOU’VE GOT JUST ENOUGH WEIRDNESS THAT YOUR PRESENCE CAN WEAKEN THE BARRIERS BETWEEN DIMENSIONS.”_ The Master laughed. _“I’LL BE ABLE TO BREAK THROUGH WITHOUT NEEDING ANOTHER PORTAL!_ ”

Anyone else would have had a sinking feeling at this point. Stan definitely did – the hair on top of his head was rising and gaining more of a feathery quality to it than it was supposed to have. His anger was still present, still filling him in the way that emptiness was all that was left of Ford.

Ford closed his eyes. If the Master was planning on using them to bring more dimensions into his chaos, that was his decision, not Ford’s.

_“SO! I’VE SET YOU A TARGET – DO WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO IN ORDER TO STAY ALIVE AND STAY OUT OF SIGHT OF THE WIDER WORLD UNTIL I CAN COME IN. IF ANYONE FINDS YOU, FINISH THEM. UNDERSTOOD?”_

“Understood, Master,” the four of them said at once.

_“THEN GET MOVING!”_

The Master snapped his fingers, and Ford’s vision went white.


	15. Dimensional Destruction

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now we get into the part of the fic that delves more into multiversal actions than the previous chapters.
> 
> Let's just say that a couple boys' plans for what they're gonna do today are suddenly changed....

When Ford’s vision cleared, he found himself kneeling in the circle that overlapped with three others. The familiar six-fingered sigil was carved into the dirt under him, but it had something added to it now – a pinwheel of three fox tails behind the handprint.

The symbol also was horribly burnt and covered in ash, and was pulsing with hidden power, a stark contrast to the bright green grass outside the circle that had so much _life_ in it.

Mabel, who was on Ford’s right, started sniffling. “Wh-why do we have to do this? I-I-I don’t—“ She broke off as she broke down into a crying fit.

“…It’s what the Master ordered,” Dipper said, quietly. “We don’t have any other choice.”

Ford registered the dead tone in Dipper’s voice as Mabel only cried even harder.

“Bullshit,” Stan muttered from Ford’s left. “We don’t even know what kinda dimension we’ve ended up in. All I see are trees.”

Ford lifted his gaze from the sigil under his feet at Stan’s words. Even more green promptly hit him in the face, and the bright sunlight that was crashing down over everything caused him to squint for a moment as his eyes adjusted to the not-red sky that was above their heads.

He returned his gaze to the sigil below him and closed his eyes.

“…got nothin’ ta add, huh?” Stan grunted. “Sure, keep your mouth shut.”

It took Mabel a few minutes to stop crying, and it left them in an eerie quiet that didn’t feel quite right. Unfortunately, it was, at the same time, something they were all used to.

Mabel sniffled. “Wh-what now?”

“We wait,” Ford said. He opened his eyes and looked up at the rest of his family. “I should think that much is obvious.”

The flat tone in his voice caused Mabel to flinch as Dipper lowered his gaze to the pine tree sigil under him, now covered in vines.

Stan huffed, but he didn’t offer an argument against Ford’s words. His expression darkened, and he turned his gaze to the world around them instead of the triangle that was in the center of their four interconnected circles.

Ford lowered his head again and closed his eyes, breathing settling into an even rhythm as he cleared his mind and prepared to wait for as long as was required for the Master to break through the dimensional walls.

It could not have been long before they were found by the locals.

“…I’m telling you, that flash came from somewhere around here! There’s gotta be something that was left here – a-a crater? Some kind of alien spacecraft?”

Ford twitched at the voice. A boy’s, probably Dipper’s age – or, what would have been Dipper’s physical age.

“You’re overthinking things; there’s no way that something like that would crash here of all places. You’ve been watching too many cartoons.”

A girl’s, possibly a teenager’s.

“Are you really forgetting Meep? After everything he did with us last summer?”

“Phineas, do you really expect me to?”

“Huh? Ferb, what’s going on?”

“We have company. And it does not look nice.”

Another boy’s, with a Birtish accent.

Stan started to raise his head at the same time that the second boy spoke. His expression shifted from surprise to one of disgust.

“Kids,” Stan said shortly. “Great.”

Mabel whimpered.

“Who are you guys?” one of the boys asked – one with a triangular face and red hair.

Ford’s expression shifted slightly. He wondered if the Master had much of a sense in irony.

“Phineas, I don’t like the looks of these guys,” the red-headed teenage girl said. “It kinda looks like they’re a part of a cult or something.”

Ford said nothing, despite how close to the truth that she had come.

“I agree,” said the green-haired boy.

A whisper of something settled in the back of Ford’s mind. _Capture them, but leave them alive. I want some entertainment when I get there._

Ford’s ears twitched. He raised his head and looked over at Stan, who gave a slight nod; Stan had heard the order just as he had.

The ground started moving underneath them as Dipper’s brow furrowed in concentration.

“Whoa!” Phineas yelped as vines suddenly burst up from the ground and encased him and the other two. “What is –“

Vines slapped around his mouth before he could finish his question.

Dipper motioned with one hand, and forced all three of them down onto their knees, hands and arms trapped at their sides as they continued to struggle against their bindings.

Ford watched them with a passive expression. Dipper had this handled.

A cackle echoed at the back of his mind; the others winced, but Ford was too used to the sound to react. The world turned gray and colorless, and the Master flickered into existence in the center of the circle the four Pines were sitting in.

 _“WELL WELL WELL, IF IT ISN’T THE LITTLE SMART-ALECS OF THIS DIMENSION!”_ The Master tipped his hat, causing gravity to shift to Ford’s right for a moment. The three caught children gave muffled yelps as they nearly fell flat on their sides. _“I’VE HEARD A LOT ABOUT YOU TWO LITTLE GENIUSES, AND I’VE GOTTA SAY – I’M IMPRESSED WITH YOUR WORK! THAT KIND OF CHAOS ON A REGULAR SUMMER’S DAY IS JUST WHAT I’M LOOKING FOR!”_

The vines pulled back from the boys’ faces with a wave of the Master’s hand.

“What are you talking about?” Phineas demanded. “Who are you guys? What are you—“

 _“I’M ASKING THE QUESTIONS HERE, KIDDO, BUT SINCE I LIKE THE SHAPE OF YOUR FACE I’LL LET YOUR QUESTIONS SLIDE FOR ONCE.”_ The Master floated over to Phineas and circled around him. _“NAME’S BILL CIPHER, AND THESE FOUR ARE MY SERVANTS! THEY’RE HELPING ME CROSS OVER INTO THIS DIMENSION TO HELP LIBERATE IT FROM THE RULES OF REALITY THAT HAVE GOT YOU STUCK! I WAS AIMING TO LIBERATE THEIRS AT FIRST, BUT THEN I THOUGHT ‘HEY – WHY NOT GET AT THE REST OF THEM?’”_ The Master’s eye gave the impression of a cruel smile. _“JUST THINK OF IT – NO GRAVITY, NO TIME, NOTHING BUT NEVER ENDING FUN AND NEVER ENDING SUMMER! I KNOW THAT APPEALS TO YOU KIDS.”_

The redhead girl with the boys started struggling against the vines surrounding her, screaming something unintelligible.

_“I’M NOT TALKING TO YOU, LOVESTRUCK, I’M TALKING TO YOUR BROTHERS.”_

Ford saw Stan look over at him, but he ignored him. Ford’s focus was on the Master, and how the two boys would react.

 _“I’M PLANNING ON COMING THROUGH IN PERSON SOON,”_ the Master added. _“SINCE THIS IS THE END OF YOUR SUMMER, THE DIMENSIONAL WALLS ARE AT THEIR WEAKEST, AND I’D LIKE A LITTLE WELCOMING PARTY WHEN I COME IN! SO WHEN I POP OUT, PINE TREE IS GONNA LET YOU GO SO THAT YOU CAN GET A HEAD START ON PREPARING FOR WHEN I GET HERE!”_

“What if we don’t want you here?” Phineas demanded. “The laws of reality are there so that our dimension doesn’t fall to pieces! You can’t just get rid of them and say that we’re liberated!”

“Phineas, be careful,” the other boy said.

 _“YEAH, LISTEN TO YOUR BROTHER. BE CAREFUL, OR ELSE YOU MAY END UP JUST LIKE FORDSY OVER THERE.”_ The Master looked over at Ford, who bowed his head and turned his gaze to the ground as a result of the attention. _“DO YOU REALLY WANT TO END UP LIKE THAT SORRY OLD MAN? HUH? NOW GO GET THAT WELCOMING PARTY PUT TOGETHER – I EXPECT ONE THAT’S REALLY GOING TO BLOW ME OUT OF THE SKY!”_

There was a bright flash, and the colors returned as the Master disappeared. Ford blinked a couple times in order to readjust back.

The vines collapsed from around the three locals, and Phineas leapt to his feet. “Come on, Ferb! We have to do something about that guy before he can get here! Candace, get everybody together and meet us back at the house.” He started moving towards the edge of the clearing.

“What about these guys?” Candace motioned to the Pines. “We can’t just _leave_ them here!”

“If we brought them with us they would no doubt report back to that triangle guy,” Ferb said. “It would be better if we left them here.”

“What if he ordered one ‘a us ta follow after ya?” Stan spoke up in a casual tone.

Ford looked over at him sharply. The Master hadn’t given them permission to speak – why was Stan --

“I’ve had practice planning things with people spying on us before,” Phineas replied. “I don’t think—“

“Not like me ya haven’t. Listen, kid, I don’t care how smart you are, and neither does that Illuminati symbol. He likes seein’ people squirm, especially the smart ones. He did that to my brother, an’ he’s gonna do it to you, too.”

Phineas paused to absorb that, frowning. Candace looked alarmed, but Ferb’s face was guarded.

“…whatever he’s going to do, we’ll be ready for it,” Phineas said. “We’ve done a lot of things this summer – things that people would say shouldn’t be possible. Fighting an inter-dimensional being and keeping our home from getting destroyed is going on that list.” He stared the four of them down with a look in his eyes that caused an old ache to settle in Ford’s chest for a moment. He dismissed it without a second thought.

“Come on Candace, Ferb.” Phineas turned, then walked out of the forest clearing with purpose. His brother followed after him, their sister right on their heels.

Stan watched them go as Ford turned back to face the center of the circle, looking down at the figure of the Master that had been stamped into the earth upon their arrival.

The children would fight back, of course. That much was inevitable – the Master and his counterparts were the kind of being with the kind of plan for dimensions that most didn’t care for. Only those who were insane in some form would accept what the Master was attempting without any change to their psyche.

Ford decided not to think about it and drifted from the waking world instead.

**Time Break**

Ford came awake with the feeling of something cold crawling down his back and into his tails, causing all three of them to shudder from base to tip as he snapped his eyes open.

 _Something_ was in the air, setting off what instincts he had left to him, telling him that something was horribly wrong and he needed to get away from the source as quickly as possible if he wanted to live.

The forest looked different from how it had when he’d arrived: the colors were muted and not the right shade of green; the blue of the sky was off, almost a blue-gray instead of a pure blue.

A dark cackle rolled through the back of his mind. _“IT IS TIME!”_

Stan, Dipper, and Mabel raised their heads at the Master’s voice, and Ford found himself looking up as well.

In the middle of their formed circle, right over the form of their Master scorched into the earth and high above their heads, was a thin crack of space-time that wavered and warped, like it was having a hard time staying in place. The sight of it caused Ford’s tails to lash back and forth – he could feel something attempting to rise up from his instincts, but he pushed it back down and ignored it.

He understood now why something was telling him to run from this rift. The Master was coming with all of the weirdness and chaos that entailed, and now that he had been _outside_ it, something in his body did not _like_ it.

The rift threatened to become wider for a moment, then pulled into itself and almost disappeared from sight. Color started coming back to the world around them, and Ford found himself relaxing a little.

Then the rift was forced wide open with a noise similar to a rip that felt more like something was screaming from horizon to horizon, and the sky turned red.

Then the Master pulled himself through, eye in an expression of mirth. _“THERE WE GO! I KNEW THAT ALL I NEEDED WAS AN ANCHOR OF MY POWER TO BREAK DOWN DIMENSIONAL BARRIERS!”_

He motioned with one hand, and the circle under the Pines started to buckle up before a black pyramid broke out from the earth, sending the Pines flying back across the clearing in four different directions as the Fearamid rose up into the air.

 _“THERE WE GO. NOW LET’S GO FIND THOSE KIDS AND SEE WHAT SORT OF PARTY THEY’VE GOT PUT TOGETHER.”_ The Master rubbed his hands together as the Pines quickly gathered in front of him. _“GO AHEAD OF ME AND TAKE CARE OF THOSE KIDS. I’LL MAKE SURE THAT THE REST OF THE WORLD KNOWS I’M HERE! COME ON, HENCHMANIACS! LET’S GO NUTS!”_

There came cries of delight from the other side of the rift, and the Henchmaniacs came scrambling through and scattered over the woods, stomping trees to the ground as animal cries rose up before becoming warped and mutilated by the waves of weirdness coming from the rift behind the Fearamid.

The chill Ford was feeling on the back of his neck faded as more weirdness poured out of the rift. “Yes, Master.” He turned and looked across the clearing at Stan, who looked at him for a moment before starting towards the edge of the clearing where they’d seen Phineas, Ferb, and Candace last.

Ford, Dipper, and Mabel followed after Stan, Mabel moving to fly up above the trees as Dipper’s eyes started to take on a glow of their own. Ford shifted down into his fox form and shook himself out for a moment before he bolted through the trees. Stan joined him a moment later, form black and green as he moved through the shadows, not quite corporeal or solid but something in-between. Ford didn’t try to see what form Stan was thinking of settling on; he focused on the orders the Master had given him.

He had human children to find.

The four of them broke through the trees and entered what looked like part of a park. Skyscrapers rose up against the sky, which was very quickly turning a familiar red.

And standing at the edge of the park was the strangest hodge-podge of devices that Ford had probably ever laid eyes on. Giant robots that looked like they had been made out of _trees,_ death rays, flying machines – all with a touch of _something_ that made them seem more like giant children’s toys that had been weaponized somehow.

 _“There they are!”_ yelled a voice from one of the tree-bots.

Ford’s ears flicked at the voice. Phineas – it had to be. He shifted from his fox form to his human one as Stan, Dipper, and Mabel moved to stand near him.

Stan cursed loudly. “You have _got_ to be kidding me. When he told ‘em ta make a welcome party, I thought those kids were gonna run and hide, not—“

 _“Get them!”_ Phineas called again.

There came a collective cry from the other people who were a part of this strange army – which were mostly _children,_ from the sound of it. They started charging across the park, weapons already firing in the Pines’ general direction.

Ford dodged a blast from a ray that turned the grass under his feet into a pile of snow right before he was hit in the face and upper body with a lemon cream pie. As he brushed the cream out of his eyes, he heard the sound of trees groaning behind him, followed by the kids’ cries of alarm and surprise as something rushed past Ford as he got the last of the pie out of his face.

He managed to get it out of his eyes right as the big hand of one of the tree-robots came bearing down on him in the shape of a fist.

Ford reacted on instinct, drawing up the same magic he’d used in the destruction of Portland and other alien worlds when the Master had finished with Earth. He forced his hands up to meet the giant creation’s fist.

The plume of fire that burst from his hands encased the creation’s arm and sent flames licking greedily into the wood it was made up of.

_“How did he—Does that guy have flamethrowers up his sleeves?!”_

_“I don’t think that he’s carrying any tech on him, Phineas! That looked a lot like magic!”_

Ford moved out from under the burning robot and moved through the battlefield with the expertise of one who’s been under fire before. The girl’s voice coming from the tree-robot he’d burned caused his ears to flick over in that direction as he went.

_“We’ll have to do something about that! Baljeet! Buford! Hit him with the water—“_

Phineas’ voice was cut off with a squawk of surprise when one of the trees Dipper had been growing into strange, contorting shapes suddenly shot out of the woods and into the heart of the tree-robot, causing it to fall over onto its back. Another tree quickly did the same with the second one standing nearby.

Ford didn’t need to look back to know that Dipper was doing; his focus was on the weaponry being pointed at him.

Another fireball was thrown, hitting a large engine near a reedy-looking man wearing a lab coat and a platypus standing next to him with a fedora on his head. The man squawked and dodged out of the way, grabbing the platypus as the engine exploded and caused a number of the death rays to power down abruptly.

 _“Doofinshmirtz’s inventions!”_ someone squeaked.

 _“Less gawking, more shooting! Soak that guy!”_ yelled someone else.

There came the roar of water moments later, and Ford looked up just as a large wave of water was thrown in his direction by what appeared to be a giant water cannon.

Ford was prepared to jump out of the way in order to prevent himself from drowning when the entire wave was caught up in a large bubble of nothing and launched back into the city, bringing up cries of alarm from the children and the lone man who was with them.

_“GOOD WORK, SHOOTING STAR! GLAD TO SEE YOU KNOW AT LEAST SOMETHING ABOUT GRAVITY OTHER THAN HOW TO MAKE IT CONDENSE ON THINGS!”_

Ford’s ears turned at the Master’s voice, and he paused mid-step towards the man in the lab coat.

 _“AND FORDSY, DIPPER – EXCELLENT WORK ON THOSE LITTLE MECHAS! MAN, WHEN I TOLD THOSE KIDS TO THROW A PARTY, I WASN’T EXPECTING THIS EXCELLENT A WELCOME!”_ The Master laughed.

Ford turned and looked up as the Master shrank down to his smaller size, Mabel landing next to him. She must have flown up to avoid most of the battle on the ground in order to use her ability as she had.

 _“SO, KIDS, YOU’VE REALLY PROVEN YOUR METTLE GOING AFTER MY PUPPETS LIKE THAT.”_ The Master’s eye curved in a smile. _“HOW ABOUT YOU JOIN UP WITH ME? I COULD USE PARTY-GOERS LIKE YOU! AND JUST THINK – YOU WOULDN’T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT SUMMER EVER ENDING WHEN YOU’RE WITH ME. YOU COULD DO EVERYTHING YOU EVER WANTED WITHOUT THAT BORING OLD SCHOOL GETTING IN THE WAY!”_

Mabel winced from where she stood next to Ford, but she said nothing as Stan made his way over to them from one of the wrecked death rays and Dipper slid up to them on a wave made of grass.

Heads started popping out of cockpits in some of the more child-themed devices: Phineas and a dark-haired girl with a pink bow in her hair came up from one of the tree robots, and Candace and a teenage boy with blond hair came out of the other.

“Do you _really_ think we’re gonna listen to you?!” Phineas demanded. “That we’re just gonna let you walk all over my dimension? No way!”

“Besides, you shouldn’t even be here!” the girl next to him added. “It says so in my handbook – geometrical demons cannot take over a dimension without having made a deal in it first.”

The Master burst out laughing. _“DO YOU REALLY THINK I NEED THAT ANYMORE? I_ **WON** _IN THEIR DIMENSION; THAT GIVES ME JURISDICTION TO DO WHATEVER I WANT!”_

The implications of that statement caused the two teenagers in the next robot over to exchange nervous looks.

“ _AND SO NOW, THAT MEANS I CAN TAKE OVER WHATEVER DIMENSIONS I THINK ARE INTERESTING ENOUGH TO LIBERATE! AND SINCE I’M STARTING WITH YOURS, YOU SHOULD FEEL EXTRA LUCKY!_ ” The Master teleported in front of Phineas’ face. _“LAST CHANCE, KID. TAKE MY DEAL – YOU’LL GET TO WORK WITH ME INSTEAD OF AGAINST ME, AND HAVE ACCESS TO WHATEVER TOOLS YOU’RE GONNA NEED TO MAKE WHATEVER YOU WANT! HOW ABOUT THAT, HUH?”_

His answer came from the girl in pink, who threw a glass flask of water at the Master.

 _“HEH. THAT KINDA TICKLED. WRONG KIND OF DEMON, GIRL SCOUT!”_ The Master held up one hand, ready to snap his fingers. _“LAST CHANCE BEFORE I—“_

Something was shot out of a cannon, and the Master had only just enough time to turn and see what it was before he was hit in the face by a large orange shuttlecock.

“Let’s go!” Ferb yelled from somewhere in the mess of destroyed and mutilated machines that were lying about. “Scatter!”

The swarm of kids and young adults who had been manning the devices the Pines had been fighting against quickly jumped away from the battlefield and disappeared into the city on what appeared to be upgraded bikes, skateboards, scooters, and in-line skates.

By the time the Master had pushed the shuttlecock off himself and pulled himself out of the tree he had been stuck to, their assailants were long gone.

The Master flickered red. _“THOSE KIDS ARE GUTSY, BUT THEY’RE GOING TO LEARN VERY QUICKLY THAT YOU DON’T TURN DOWN A DEAL FROM ME!”_ He turned back to yellow and adjusted his bow tie and hat before adding cheerily, _“NOT LIKE IT’S GOING TO DO THEM ANY GOOD THOUGH! THEY DON’T HAVE ANYTHING HERE THAT COULD POSSIBLY PUT A STOP TO ME! GO AHEAD AND TURN THIS TOWN UPSIDE DOWN – AND SPREAD THE WORD! DANVILLE’S GOT A NEW MASTER IN TOWN, AND HE ISN’T SOME DOOF, THAT’S FOR SURE!”_

“Yes, Master,” the Pines chorused in reply.

Mabel took to the air instantly and flew into the city as Dipper stepped into the street. Vines drove their way up through the cracks in the asphalt and started tearing up the road at an accelerated pace.

Stan disappeared in a blur of black, and Ford took off after him, shifting to his fox form as he went.

 _It’s just like Portland all over again,_ Ford considered at the back of his mind. He squashed the thought a moment later and focused instead on the objective that the Master had given them. Stopping to think about similar, past events wasn’t going to help them any.

Especially when this world, while being an Earth, was not _theirs._


	16. Interlude 1: Rumors

Bars were good places for gathering information, but they could also be cesspools filled with the most disgusting life forms ever seen this side of the multiverse.

And it seemed that this time around Ford was the one being subjected to that very prejudice by the beings around him. He decided to ignore it as best he could and nurse his gin while keeping his ears open.

 _At least they have something here that_ won’t _kill me outright._

“—heard that there’s a monster that serves—“

“—oh yeah, yeah, I’ve heard of him. If he catches you and takes you, you’re pretty much dead and gone. Stuck in those prison cells until—“

“Cells? Nah, man, I was talking about the monster that tortures certain people to death! You know, the one with the eyepatch?”

Ford felt a chill run down his spine as one of the neighboring conversations wandered in the direction of information he’d already heard about. A human who’d been changed and was serving Cipher – a _Stanley,_ no less. He was lucky so far to have been able to avoid running into him, but it was only a matter of time before all Fords were caught by that monster.

Ford took a swig of his drink and decided that kind of rumor wasn’t what he needed to hear about. Stanley – or, the one called “Fish” or “Piraña” in some circles – was old news to him. He knew that the monster was out there, but not in the dimension he happened to be _in_ at the moment.

“Well, I was talking about the other guy – the one that’s popped up recently and is buddy-buddies with the bounty hunters.”

Ford’s ears proverbially itched, and he tilted his head slightly – not too quickly to draw attention to himself, but just slightly enough that he could hear a little more clearly what was being said.

The reptilian aliens in this dimension had very good senses when it came to movement. He didn’t want to give them any intention of appearing to be eavesdropping.

“Other guy?”

“Yeah – the one that looks like those smooth fellows we’ve been seeing around so much – except this one’s got fur in places. You think those ‘hoomans’ have some chance of getting tails in a few centuries? Or at some point in their past?”

 _Tails?_ Ford blinked. There was a counterpart of his who had a tail? And fur?

Was he a monkey yet or—

“I haven’t heard of him…humans are supposed to come from primates, so does this guy walk around on all fours or—“

“No, no, on two feet. He’s got vulpine tails and matching ears on his head – not where human ears are.”

“Plural tails? How many?”

“Reports vary. Some say as few as two, some say as many as four, recently. No one really knows for sure. All they do know is that if a bounty hunter catches a Ford, this guy finds them and does the exchange – the guy for the bounty.”

Ford felt a chill run down his spine.

A _Ford?_ Turning in his counterparts and giving the bounty hunters the rewards?

But to who? And why?

“They say this guy turned around and decided Cipher wasn’t such a bad guy,” one of the reptilians said casually.

“What, really? I thought that Fords were better than that. I mean, they’re big pests in different dimensions, but they’re supposed to be the thing holding Cipher _back,_ aren’t they?”

“You’d think so. But apparently some of them like changing sides.”

Ford gritted his teeth. Hearing _that_ was even worse than hearing about the initial comments about his counterpart. In order to keep him from grinding his teeth down, he finished off his gin.

The act of putting the glass down may have been a bit more forceful than he initially intended; the sound caused eyes to crawl over his back instantly.

“…hey, _that’s_ a—“

Ford turned slightly at the voice and met the eyes of the reptilian speaking from across the room.

“…you think he heard us?” asked the second one next to him.

Ford’s eyes narrowed. “My hearing isn’t terrible,” he called back. “What is this about a counterpart of mine going to _his_ side?”

The two reptilians looked at each other.

“Well, it’s only rumor because anyone who’s ever seen the guy’s either a bounty hunter – and they don’t talk much – or one of you.” The first reptilian shrugged. “And the chances of you coming back from an encounter like _that,_ well. What do you think they are, if he takes you straight to Cipher?”

Ford’s eyes narrowed. “What makes you think he’s working with him?”

“What makes you think that anyone else in the multiverse wants Fords so bad?” the reptilian replied. “I mean, sure you guys all have your crimes out here, but the only one who wants your head _bad_ enough to put out a bounty _that_ high is you-know-who. Some of us have to make a living, you know, and making off with stuff you need that you really should have paid for doesn’t exactly help us very much.”

His companion nodded in agreement. “Yup. So this vulpine Ford has to be working with Cipher.”

“For,” Ford corrected. “You don’t work _with_ him, you work _for_ him. I should think that the rest of the multiverse knows by now that Cipher doesn’t see anyone as an equal.”

The reptilians exchanged looks.

“He’s a good one, all right,” said the first.

His companion nodded in agreement, then motioned for Ford to take the third, empty chair at their table. Ford took the invitation – hesitantly, but that was mostly because of the _other_ eyes in the bar that were on him now.

If there was a bounty hunter in here with them, they were going to be having some trouble shortly.

The reptilians, on a closer inspection, did indeed have green scales covering every inch of them – at least, Ford assumed – with a blue tint to the color that made the scales refract different colors. Judging by the fins on their heads and the gills at their throats, these reptilians in particular were adapted for life underwater as well as life on land.

“So, I guess you haven’t heard things about this Ford yet either,” the first reptilian commented.

Ford shook his head. “I knew the existence of Piraña – most of us do, as far as I know – but I haven’t heard of a counterpart of _me_ serving _him_ willingly _.”_

“Well, I don’t think any of us know the basics of whatever it is he’s got going on.” The reptilian shrugged. “Especially since he’s so elusive and doesn’t appear except for certain people.”

“Yes….” One of Ford’s hands brushed against the gun strapped to his hip. “I’m more than aware of the dangers of setting off an event of that sort. How have you heard about him?”

“Rumors from other hunters that have heard people talk about Cipher’s rewards.” The reptilian shrug. “Dunno why they’re being encouraged to ‘share the wealth;’ if I was in their shoes, I’d probably try and do it all on my own, not become part of some network or alliance. But I’m not a bounty hunter – not for you guys. You’d have to be insane to do something like that.”

“Sometimes I wonder,” Ford muttered in reply. “Still, this is dangerous. If it’s possible for Cipher to bring one of my counterparts to his side, then that means he could do the same for more than one of us if the right kind of criteria is met. We need this news to spread quickly, or else the defeat of Cipher might take longer than any of us might be willing to admit.”

The two reptilians nodded at once.

“He’s already taken our dimension,” one of them said.

“We don’t want him to take another one,” the other added.

Ford nodded curtly. “Do what you have to to get that word out. I’ll do what I can as well – any counterparts out there who may have crossed his path already or could cross his path in the future need to know what it is that they are up against as much as possible. If…if he’s been taken as someone for Cipher to use again, then there’s a chance that his dimension will eventually fall to him as well – if it hasn’t already.”

The two reptilians didn’t look like they wanted to think about that very much.

Ford didn’t either, but if there was a version of him out there that was causing trouble, it was something he _had_ to think about.

“I doubt that this Cipher has any need for having a version of my brother, so I doubt this Ford is Piraña’s,” Ford commented. He rested his elbows on the table and steepled his fingers in thought, resting his chin on his thumbs. “We might be able to get through to him if we find his brother, but the worry _there_ is whether or not said counterpart has died at some point.”

“You have a brother?” one of the reptilians asked in surprise.

He was elbowed by the other one. “That’s who Fish is, you idiot.”

“Oh – wait, really? They look so much alike I thought Fish was another—“

“We’re twins; it happens,” Ford replied curtly. “Regardless, there are other things to be thinking about right now – like what we could possibly do about—“

The door to the bar was suddenly blown open, causing everyone inside to turn sharply and reach for their weapons.

Upon seeing the two Fords at the entrance, however – one a veteran to traveling between dimensions, and the other a rookie – they paused.

One Ford traveling on his own was enough to stir things up in a singular dimension, but _two_ of them _together?_ That was almost unheard of and should have been impossible.

Ford frowned and made a mental note that the rumors concerning counterparts coming into contact with each other was very much false.

The two of them stumbled into the bar and almost collapsed at one of the tables. They looked exhausted and hyper-alert.

“What happened?” the bartender demanded. “If you’re going to be bringing in trouble, I’m going to have to ask you to—“

The older of the two Fords held up a hand. “Just…give us a moment. We need a few minutes’ rest and to give you a warning.”

“A warning?” Ford rose to his feet, getting the others’ attention. “Concerning what?”

The two counterparts looked over at him.

“We just escaped,” the older Ford said, “from Cipher’s Fearamid.”

That statement caused a flurry of action in the bar as patrons started speaking in hushed tones.

“We’ve got a warning, too,” the younger Ford added. “There’s a counterpart of ours who’s going around and collecting Fords for Cipher.”

“I know.”

“You’ve seen him?”

“No; I’ve only heard rumors.”

The younger Ford snorted. “Lucky you. We got the full nine yards of it. We’re lucky we managed to get away!”

 _That_ caused even more whispering among the patrons.

“You’re saying you have proof that this counterpart of ours exists?” Ford asked. “And you managed to get away from him? How?”

“ _Someone_ decided to be reckless and stage a breakout,” the older Ford replied. “We’re lucky that it worked _and_ that even _some_ of us managed to get away from there in time.”

Ford couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “Then…then you’re possibly one of the few first-hand accounts that could be out in the multiverse – you know about him and what he’s capable of!” He strode over to their table and slammed his hands down against the table, leaning against it. “Tell me.”

The two other Fords gained grim expressions.

“As far as we can tell, our counterpart is a _kitsune_ ,” the older Ford said. “Considering that the number of tails he has fluctuates between accounts, it makes sense.”

“Did he become that? Or was he always one?”

“Could be either way, probably,” the younger Ford spoke up. “I mean, infinite universes, right?”

“Which would mean Stanley is probably one, too,” Ford commented.

“Not from what we saw,” the older Ford replied.

“What else can you say for certain about him?”

“He’s collared like an animal,” the younger Ford remarked. “Manacled, too, but the chains only manifest when Cipher wants them to.” He leaned forward, expression dark. “And no matter how much we tell him that he has to fight back against Cipher, he doesn’t do _anything._ It’s like talking to a brick wall. The other guy, on the other hand—“

“The changeling,” the older Ford said. “That’s his Stanley.”

“Yeah, him; he definitely doesn’t like what they’re doing. When I asked him why he didn’t just bolt he gave me this look.”

The younger Ford demonstrated the expression. It looked like a mix between someone about to lose their temper but was hit with a wave of guilt and despair at the same time.

Younger Ford relaxed out of the expression and shrugged. “So I don’t know _what’s_ going on with that.”

Ford frowned, considering. “He must have been forced into his position, then. But our counterpart – what does he do? What is he capable of?”’

The other two exchanged looks.

“Well, other than following Cipher’s orders to the letter and being a little stronger than we are on average…we’re not sure if he’s capable of anything else.” The older Ford shook his head. “I’m sure he has cause to give demonstrations of that power elsewhere, but he didn’t during the breakout. It was mostly this little fairy girl who could manipulate gravity and a nature sprite summoning vines to attempt to tie us down.”

“So he has more other than Ford _and_ Stan at his disposal.” Ford’s eyes narrowed. “We need to get this word out – make sure that none of our other counterparts are caught by our madman of a counterpart.”

The two counterparts in front of him nodded in grim agreement.

“There are others who got out,” younger Ford said. He grinned widely. “We’ll be able to get the word out no problem, and maybe find a way to knock some sense into that guy in the long run.”

“If we can find him without being caught again,” the older Ford muttered. “Warning our counterparts is all we can do for now.”

Ford nodded in agreement, then paused. “If he is a _kitsune,_ as you say, how many tails does he have now?”

“Four,” the younger Ford replied.

Ford nodded. “All right; that means news involving him with more tails is probably more recent. We’ll have to keep our ears to the ground for those.”

The two Fords nodded in agreement.

“Let’s move and get the news out.” The older Ford looked around the bar. “And that goes for the rest of you who’ve been listening in; if you see a Ford and you’re not a bounty hunter, _warn him._ If Cipher is to be beaten, we can’t let ourselves be stopped by even one of us turning over to his side.”

There were a number of nods in agreement, and people started moving out of the bar with haste in their footsteps.

“I should get moving as well,” Ford said. “I’ve spent long enough in this dimension.”

“Go,” the older Ford said.

“And hopefully you won’t be crossing paths with _him_ anytime soon,” the younger added.

Ford nodded, then slipped out of the bar without another word.


	17. Interlude 2: The Breakout

Ford pulled at the chains holding his arms in place, gritting his teeth with an annoyed, angered expression as he tried to find a way to wear down on the metal to the point that it wouldn’t be able to hold together for much longer.

“That’s not going to work,” said his cellmate – a tired, older version of himself who had been trapped there for longer than Ford had been.

“How do you know that?” Ford snapped back.

“Kid, what do you think? I’ve tried wrenching my own arms out and I still end up stuck back here; we’re not gonna be breaking any chains anytime soon.”

“I _refuse_ to believe that.” Ford gave a low snarl as he continued to attempt to wear down the chains, but something at the back of his mind knew that it would take a long time for any metal to wear down.

Especially any metal that existed in the Fearamid.

Stanford sighed, but he didn’t say anything to dissuade his counterpart from continuing to exhaust himself by attempting to break loose. He clenched his fists – cuffed, with the chains looping through a circle of metal in the wall above his head, like Ford’s – and did something else instead.

Stanford rapped his knuckles against the wall behind him six times.

Six raps back.

The grin that crossed Stanford’s face caused Ford to stare at him with wide eyes.

“What are you—“

Stanford released the power he was holding back.

The funny thing about Fords who came from dimensions across the multiverse – some were occasionally privy to having powers that counterparts _didn’t_ have.

And Ciphers themselves were tricky beings. They only knew things that they could see when there was something with their shape nearby – especially when there was an eye attached – so when he picked up a strange fruit on one of the worlds he’d encountered, he mastered it quickly and used it sparingly as soon as he left that dimension.

So having the chains on his wrists suddenly crumble into dust at the sudden, accelerated force of entropy was something that Cipher would have never known about.

“Cipher and his pet are out, if we have any chance of getting out, it’s now.” Stanford pulled his power back and rose to his feet while his younger counterpart stared at him, eyes wide and jaw dropped.

Ford quickly recovered his composure. “H-how did you—“

“One of our counterparts has a good view of the throne room from here.” Stanford grabbed his counterpart’s chains and exerted enough force to cause the links to crumble; he pulled back before the heat death could spread to Ford’s hands.

Ford quickly scrambled to his feet as Stanford looked around at the cell. “Wh-how did you –“

“Questions can be answered later, but if you’re going to get out of here, it’s not going to be with me.” Stanford looked at the wall he had been leaning against, then put his hands against it.

The black bricks held for a moment, but then they lost their luster and crumbled to dust. The hole in the wall only proceeded to become larger as Stanford continued to press his hands against the bricks, giving him an opening into the cell next door.

“About damn time,” said the only Ford in the cell. “How the hell did you get a power like that, anyway?”

“Let’s just say that trading this power for the ability to swim was a smart decision to make.” Stanford disintegrated the links keeping his counterpart in place, and the other Ford quickly pulled his arms away.

“Well, Entropy, you weren’t kidding about the power bit,” the other Ford grunted. “I’ll get the cuffs off later – you get everyone else out of here.”

Entropy nodded, then set to work, leaving the younger counterpart he’d shared his cell with behind as he started going in the other direction.

“You two have been planning a breakout,” the younger Ford realized.

“What gave it away?” His other – again, older – counterpart gave him a knowing smirk. He reached into his jacket and pulled out a gun-looking object. “You ever seen one of these before, Ford?”

Ford shook his head. “What is it?”

“A portal _gun._ It won’t work to its full capacity here, but we don’t need it to – especially since mine will explode as soon as we get back into the rest of the multiverse.” He made a face. “I’m going to have to talk to Rick about that one.”

“Rick?”

“No one you need to worry about.” The other Ford looked back through the hole that Entropy had made, then motioned for Ford to follow him as he made his way back through.

Ford quickly followed after him. “You were waiting for Cipher and the others to be gone to do this, because then you knew that he wasn’t going to be able to put a stop to anything we were doing.”

“Glad to see that I was still really smart in my younger years,” the older Ford groused. “Hey, Entropy! Don’t forget the guys on the other side!”

“Already on it!”

The two Fords looked over across the hall and saw Entropy walking _through_ walls without being slowed down.

“I won’t be able to do this much longer!” he added.

“You’re doing enough!” the older Ford called back. “Don’t use yourself up to nothingness, you idiot, we talked about this!”

Entropy stopped in the middle of a cell; the strange glow that was surrounding him as a result of his power faded, and he collapsed to the ground. His hand dropped from where he’d been burning away at a set of links holding another counterpart in place.

“There’s still more,” the older Ford muttered as he and Ford followed their counterparts out into the corridor. He raised his voice. “We don’t have much time! Everyone, find a rift or use whatever means necessary to get out before—“

_“ROUND THOSE IDIOTS UP!”_

Ford paled abruptly at the echoing, loud voice that he used to think he could only hear in his nightmares. “That’s—“

“RUN!” the Ford next to him bellowed.

The yell caused the corridor to suddenly be filled with war cries and orders from Ford’s counterparts as they scrambled around. Some pulled weapons out of seemingly nowhere and started shooting at the four figures that were coming into the corridor. Others ran from the destroyed cells as those still trapped yelled for their counterparts to get out while they still could.

The older Ford started preparing to activate the portal gun in his hands as Ford started backing up nervously.

Ford remembered his counterpart – the older him with the kitsune appearance and Cipher’s marks on the collar he wore. He remembered Stan, who looked more hollow and defeated than he had ever seen him.

But those two kids had looked like they had powers as well and he definitely _didn’t_ want to know what it was they were capable of.

The older Ford grabbed him by the arm and pulled him closer as others scrambled around them as something rumbled in the floor below; Ford saw what looked like vines starting to come up through the cracks between stones while gravity started to lose its hold.

“U-uh—“

“Hang on.” The older Ford wrapped an arm around his younger counterpart as he continued to fiddle with his portal gun. “Almost—“

A large fireball was suddenly thrown into the crowd of Fords, setting the slowly growing vines on fire and catching several Fords in the midst of its flames. Yell of pain quickly followed by flashes of green or purple could be seen in the flames – counterparts were activating portals and scattering out to the rest of the Multiverse.

But there were others who weren’t so lucky. Already, Ford could see some of his counterparts being grabbed and pulled from the flames by the counterpart who was under Cipher’s employ, now able to see him more clearly: wearing black clothes as he was, the red-gold fur of the ears on his head and the four tails under his trench coat only became more visible.

Cipher’s pet turned his gaze from the counterpart he’d just captured to Ford and his older counterpart. Ford gulped; the look on his counterpart’s face was grim, emotionless.

Before he could try and spot where the two children were – or Stan, for that matter – Ford’s older counterpart let out a triumphant shout before everything started to go green.

The next thing that Ford knew, he was being blown out of a green portal by an explosion that sent him and his older counterpart flying into a boulder.

It took Ford a moment before he could recover from the impact. He shook his head and adjusted his glasses’ position on his nose before looking around.

He spotted his older counterpart a short distance away, groaning as he started to get to his feet. Between the two of them was a small crater that was tinted a weird, sickly-looking green.

“Well, there goes my way around the multiverse,” the older Ford muttered. “Never finished reverse-engineering the damn thing.” He pushed himself up to his feet, then made his way over to Ford and helped him up as well.

“Where are we?” Ford asked.

“Another version of Earth – one I’ve been to before,” the older Ford replied. “Reptilians are the dominant species here, but they are multiverse-aware, so we shouldn’t be bothered too much.”

“A-alternate version?”

The older Ford looked at his younger counterpart and raised an eyebrow. “You don’t know?”

Ford shook his head. “I-I’ve only been traveling for three years, I – I didn’t think that there could _be_ alternate Earths where reptiles are actually the dominant species instead of just the shadow government.”

The older Ford snorted. “You’ve got a lot to learn, kid. Come on.” He started moving away from the crater and along the craggy landscape they’d exploded onto.

“To where?”

“The nearest bar. What better place than to spread news about that damned counterpart of ours?”

Ford considered that, then quickly scrambled after his counterpart. “You and Entropy – were you traveling together before?”

“What does it matter? He’s either been dragged out or captured again by now,” the older Ford replied grimly.

Ford’s expression sobered instantly from curiosity to a familiar grimness. “Entropy sacrificed himself by using his power for us.”

“Exactly. And we’re not about to let that go to waste.” The older Ford’s expression was also grim. “Come on. If we don’t do something now about our counterpart, things will only get worse for us in the future. Far worse.”

Ford nodded in agreement, then picked up his pace as best he could.

They’d managed to get out in the chaos, and get out alive at that.

Keeping others from falling into that fate by warning them was the best thing they could do for now.


	18. Interlude 3: Homestead

Cassandra Pines stood at the window in front of Pines Pawns – or what used to be the pawn shop, as all the gold and other valuables had been raided and taken out a long time ago. The monsters that now had free run of their home dimension stomped down what remained of Glass Shard Beach, chasing a few refugees up and down the ruined streets and collapsing the few standing walls that remained of some of the buildings.

The only building that was left completely standing was the pawn shop, and even it wasn’t doing too well against the battering of elements that came down from the blood-red sky at irregular intervals. Already there were holes in the roof, and the second floor wasn’t livable in the least.

At least the people hiding here were, for the most part, left alone.

“Ma, come away from the window. You don’t know what kinds of monsters are going to want to fly in here and cause trouble.”

Cassandra turned and looked at her only son left free. Ghostly, translucent tears glistened in her eyes for a moment, but she quickly blinked them away.

Her son’s gaze – so much like Filbrick’s when he was younger, but _so much_ like her two other boys’ – softened, and he motioned for her to move closer. “I know, Ma. I…I kinda miss him, too.”

Cassandra shook her head. “That’s not who I’m thinkin’ about and you know it, Shermie.”

Shermie looked away at Cassandra’s words, and his expression hardened. “Ma—“

“I know what you’re gonna say, Shermie, an’ it ain’t gonna change my mind,” Cassandra said seriously. “I know you have your opinions, but I have _facts._ Those boys don’t want to be doing this. Stanford definitely doesn’t, and from the sound of it, neither does Stanley.”

“They pulled _my grandkids_ into their whole mess, Ma.” Shermie’s gaze hardened. “I don’t know what the _hell_ Ford was up to in Oregon, but if it brought around _this_ and it got the kids involved—“

Cassandra was in her son’s face in an instant. “Sherman Pines, what happened in Gravity Falls to Ford was meant ta happen, whether we like it or not. The only thing that’s diff’rent from what _did_ happen was that they were supposed ta _beat_ that thing up there.”

“What makes you think that, Ma? How could you know something like that?”

“Grandma, what do you know that the rest of us don’t?”

Cassandra looked over as Alex came up from the basement, looking concerned.

“What is going on? Why is it that _you’re_ still here but Grandpa _isn’t?”_ Alex asked.

Cassandra looked between Alex and Shermie. She sighed and shook her head. “Our family has been intertwined with things that you will never get involved in because you don’t have what’s needed fer it. If I’d been at my great-grandkids’ birth, an’ I knew what I know now, I would’a told ya they were destined ta save the world. Now…somethin’ changed everythin,’ an’ I’m not sure what or why.” She frowned out the window.

That damn triangle’s pyramid could be seen hovering high in the sky. It looked like it was flying over Glass Shard Beach, but really, it was back in Gravity Falls. Some warping of broken physics, no doubt.

“Ta start ta explain everythin’, I’ve always had some inherent, actual psychic ability.” Cassandra looked back at the few Pines who had managed to escape the chaos – including Karen as she poked her head up from the basement. “It’s a family thing, but it tends ta change dependin’ on what the next generation needs. An’ my twins and yer grandkids ended up gettin’ a destiny that got them mixed up in a big mess up in Oregon. An’ that’s puttin’ it lightly.”

“No kidding,” Alex said pointedly, frowning.

Cassandra shot him a look, then adjusted her composure. “That demon’s been a plague to our family, on an’ off over the las’ few centuries. He knew Ford was comin,’ somehow. Only reason I know is ‘cause that thing started droppin’ hints. He called me Mind Eye – somethin’ I only heard in dreams.”

“Mind Eye?” Shermie frowned. “That’s a psychic thing, isn’t it?”

“Yup. An’ the fact that he knew it set off quite a few alarm bells in my head.” Cassandra’s expression saddened. “There’s a prophecy in Gravity Falls involvin’ our kids. I’m not sure what happened, but if they weren’t able ta beat him, somethin’ must’ve come up that none of us were expectin.’ Not even the people who lived up there before knew about this.”

“If they didn’t know about it, why did they come up with that prophecy?” Shermie frowned. “Somethin’ doesn’t sound right, Ma.”

“I know.” Cassandra’s voice was clipped. “There are a lot of things that don’ make sense – if time’s stopped an’ there’s impossible things happenin’ ta gravity an’ Axolotl knows what else—“

“Axolotl?” Karen repeated in confusion.

“—then we’re just gonna have ta adapt,” Cassandra finished pointedly.

“What I want to know is if we can save our kids,” Alex responded. “They shouldn’t have to – to do what they’ve been doing!”

A loud squeal came from the basement, and a pig’s head poked up next to Karen.

“Do you know anything about that, Grandma?!”

Cassandra looked away from them, brow furrowing. “Any future vision ability I _have_ stopped when I _died._ I don’t know what’s comin’, but all I can hope is that they’ll be able to find a way out eventually.”

“Stan said they might not be able to find a way out, and that triangle definitely made it sound like there _wasn’t,”_ Alex shot back. “We’re going to be stuck here until this world falls apart, and then what? We die in the nothingness that’s going to be left?”

“Don’t you _dare_ say that!” Cassandra snapped. The temperature in the room dropped suddenly. “They _will_ find a way out; don’t give up hopin’ for them when they can’t do it themselves!”

Alex winced at Cassandra’s angry retort.

“Ma, calm down,” Shermie said worriedly. “Gettin’ mad isn’t gonna help.”

Cassandra took in a breath and forced the temperature to rise back up. Her hair stopped floating behind her – she was still getting used to the ‘ghosty’ physics she had to her now.

“My boys are smart,” Cassandra said. “They’ll find a way out of this. Either that or it’ll smack their stubborn faces and pull ‘em out of their situation without their say-so. I know they’re not gonna be stuck like that forever. They can’t be.”

“I know, Ma,” Shermie said quietly.

The pig snuffled. Karen patted it.

“You know, I really think this is Mabel’s pig,” Karen said thoughtfully. “You know, the one she wrote about in her letters. Waddles, I think?”

The pig snuffled again and nuzzled against her.

Alex stared at his wife and the pig with something of a dumbfounded expression.

Cassandra laughed weakly. “She certainly seems like the girl ta have one.” She floated over in front of Waddles – who didn’t flinch back or run squealing downstairs. “Hopefully these two’ll be reunited soon. I don’ think she’s doin’ too well without her best friend nearby.”

Waddles oinked; it sounded like an agreement.

“Things’ll get better.”

“How can you say that?” Alex muttered.

“Because they have’ta,” Cassandra replied. “You three—“

Waddled oinked.

“—Four came ta me thinkin’ there was somethin’ we could still do despite what’s happened. I say there is somethin’ we can still do. An’ that’s hope for those who can’t. We need ta hope that they’ll find a way ta get away from what they’re doin’ now.”

Cassandra looked back at the window, out at the chaos beyond their little haven.

“Or else we may never see the end ta this.”

 


	19. Interlude 4: Stan's Personal Quest

****Stan _hated_ what he’d become.

He _hated_ that he was forced to do to other dimensions what the Master had done to theirs, that he didn’t have a _say_ in _anything_ that he was doing, and that there was _nothing_ that could be done to stop it.

Except, maybe, fight back somehow. But that was…difficult, to say the least.

And so, since Stan couldn’t fight back physically and had what he _could_ say and do restricted, he did what he had learned to do best.

Bend the rules.

Considering that he had no free will of his own (and he knew it, you didn’t have to rub it in his face in Portland five centuries ago, _Ford)_ , actual rule-bending was a little difficult. Since the Master was more than willing to let him go off and do his own thing to gain others’ trust, though…

Stan kept this in mind as he sat down at a table with a tray of something that just barely passed as lunch. He was wearing one of his victims again – a lanky dark-haired nerd who Stan distinctly remembered tasted like pot on the way down.

It hadn’t been a _bad_ taste, necessarily, but it wasn’t one that Stan was too fond of when he’d basically become stoned for a good hour after that.

“You doing okay?” He asked as he looked over at the other guy sitting at the table.

The other kid sighed. “I dunno, man.” The dark-haired teen picked at his slop despondently. “I thought ghosts were bad enough, but _demons_ that warp reality? I don’t think any tech my family has would be able to do anything against this guy.”

“And then there are those minions of his,” Stan added.

“Ugh, don’t talk to me about the minions I’ve had it up to _here_ with the minions!” He motioned to somewhere high above his head. “All those minions coming after us and trying to get us over to ‘his side’ it just –“ He slammed his fist into the table, fork in a white-knuckle grip. Some people looked over, but then they looked away and focused on their own conversations.

He sighed. “What I don’t understand is how the heck he got those kids to join up with him.”

Stan shifted in his seat at the mention of Dipper and Mabel. “Yeah…kinda wonder what caused that to happen.”

“I mean, the girl definitely doesn’t look like she wants to be there.” The other frowned, poking at the food again. “Every time I’ve seen her, it looks like she’s crying.”

Stan winced. “Yeah, she…she does that a lot.”

He didn’t want to think about Mabel and how she was handling all this. She was probably the only one _left_ out of all of them who was still expressing her opinion openly about her situation.

Maybe he could use that to his advantage.

“Wanna bet she didn’t sign up for this?” Stan suggested. “I mean, if _she_ doesn’t like this, what about some of the others?”

“If they didn’t, they’d probably be less willing to go along with whatever’s going on,” the other replied. “I mean, I haven’t seen _them_ fighting back against that stupid triangle.”

“Maybe they can’t?” Stan shrugged, then looked down at his lunch tray. Honestly, it looked more like fly food than anything edible for humans, but he was already a walking garbage dump anyway. He took a forkful of the mystery meat and swallowed.

“What do you mean they can’t?”

Stan paused at the question, considering how he could answer.

The Master _had_ told them that they couldn’t say _how_ they got under his control, but dropping hints was still definitely an option.

And it was one that Stan had been taking advantage of the last few dimensions they’d knocked into the Master’s Nightmare Realm.

Stan looked around, then leaned towards the teen and said, “I’ve heard rumors that he’s controlling them somehow. Like, they don’t _want_ to be there, but they _can’t_ get away.”

The other looked at him with a confused expression for a moment, then his expression sharpened with realization. “You mean that they’re doing all this against their free will? Like they have something that he’s holding hostage? Like their world?”

“Maybe?” Stan shrugged. Playing the lying game was easy; he’d done this for longer than anyone ever could now. If he could play his cards right, he might be able to get certain events going.

And with this kid’s abilities, Stan bet that there was a better chance that things would turn out okay than in the last few dimensions they’d been forced to help take over.

The other kid frowned, his blue eyes flashing green for a moment. “I dunno. Considering how most of these guys are acting, I wonder if those tears are an act or something to make people _think_ she doesn’t want to be there. Like a crocodile tears thing.”

“Well, she definitely doesn’t smile after anything she does,” Stan pointed out.

“Yeah, I noticed that, too – and neither does her brother or that old man with the animal implants. Or is he a magic creature of some kind too?”

Stan shrugged. “Probably? I mean, if ghosts and demons are real, why not anything else?”

This kid was smart – Stan could see it. The fact that his parents were absolute geniuses when it came to ghosts and spirits was nothing compared to this kid’s street smarts.

“…good point.” The other nodded. “But what would we be able to do to stop them…I bet Sam and Tucker would be able to dig something up from the library – or maybe Mr. Lancer. Maybe there’s some literature unit he never got to that covers stuff from other countries!” He grinned at Stan. “We might just be able to beat those demons back to where they came from!”

“And maybe see what’s going on with that star kid?” Stan suggested.

“Yeah, maybe. If Mr. Lancer has anything on star fairies like her, then we’d be able to know whether or not they really are crocodile tears. I’m gonna go find him right now.”

With that, the other teen got up from the table and scrambled over to another part of the cafeteria, calling for his friends.

Stan remained at the empty table for another few minutes, poking at his mystery meat as he took stock of the group that was left in the cafeteria. Mostly high school students, some adults – mostly teachers, probably – and some…spectral figures that were a little more solid than Stan would have liked them to be.

He hadn’t exactly expected to see _ghosts_ around here when they’d dropped in, but Ford and Dipper had at least taken it in stride when they’d been dropped here. Must’ve been some of those hanging around Gravity Falls somewhere before everything went to shit.

A chill ran down Stan’s back suddenly.

“Well, this is interesting.”

Stan yelped and jumped back as one of the ghosts who haunted the place came through the wall behind him.

“I didn’t think that a soul could be connected to another’s this way!” The ghost reached out a gnarled hand and plucked at something in mid-air with a quill.

An involuntary shudder ran through Stan as something blue shimmered into existence where the ghost’s feather quill had come into contact with something thin and invisible.

Stan felt a tug at his neck and swallowed.

“You know, I didn’t think that this demon was at all threatening until I saw this,” the ghost said casually. “If you don’t mind me asking, how is it that he managed to bind you, hmm?”

“I-I don’ know what you’re talkin’ about,” Stan said quickly – maybe a little too quickly.

_Shit shit shit I can’t do anything against ghosts SHIT—_

“I think you do,” the ghost replied. “And I’m going to get my answers. What did that demon do?”

“Can’t tell ya.”

 _Shit,_ that had been an automatic answer. Stan had been meaning to lie – meaning to find a way to get out of this without getting more attention – but when a ghost in this place has their eyes set on you and you can’t physically actually fight them that makes things a little difficult.

“Hey, Ghost-Writer! What are you doing over there?”

Stan saw the kid from before coming back.

“Just researching, Phantom, like any writer should,” Ghost Writer replied casually. “I want to make sure that I have everything figured out so that I can write up a history of this event later. You can understand that – you are going to want your children and grandchildren to know what happened here.” He fixed a rather dark glint of a gaze on Danny, who stopped short. “This one has secrets – he knows something. And I am going to _write_ it out of him.”

Stan swallowed visibly. _Shit,_ this was _not_ the direction he’d wanted this to go. But this was how it always went at some point in the other dimensions – he dropped enough hints to _maybe,_ just _maybe_ get someone to think about what dragged them all into this situation in the first place. And then some moron came in and _ruined_ everything by wanting to get more info out of him than he’d already given.

Shit.

Ghost Writer held up his feather quill and was about to put it down to paper when a large vine suddenly burst through the wall behind him. Blood-red flowers instantly bloomed across it, and the ghost _screamed_ in pain before flying across the room as fast as he could.

“Blood Blossoms!” Danny exclaimed. “Hey, you – get back! Who knows what those things can do to—“

“Kid, do yourself a favor and get the hell out of here,” Stan called back, shifting to the accent he’d had since birth. “Remember what I told ya. They don’t _like_ what they’re doin,’ but they _can’t_ —“

_“STANLEY PINES, DO YOURSELF A FAVOR AND SHUT UP.”_

Stan winced as the Master’s voice boomed from somewhere outside. Any other activity in the room froze at the sound.

“Wait.” Danny looked shocked. “You’re one of—“

_“START CAUSING SOME CHAOS DOWN THERE, CHOP-CHOP. I’M GOING TO HAVE TO HAVE A LITTLE_ **_TALK_ ** _WITH YOU WHEN YOU’RE DONE.”_

Stan shuddered again, then his appearance rippled as he shifted from the pot-smoking teen he’d eaten back to his normal form.

The people in the cafeteria stared at him for two seconds, then bolted screaming as more vines with the flowers started to grow into the cafeteria.

Stan shot Danny an apologetic look, then lunged for the kid.

**Time Break**

Danny and his core team managed to get away from the chaos, which Stan silently chalked up to dumb luck and skill on their part.

The angered, betrayed look that Danny’d had on his face when Stan had nearly eaten his sister, however, was one that he wasn’t going to be forgetting for a long time. At least she’d had the foresight to stun him with something that kept him in place long enough for her to bolt.

Still, he couldn’t help but feel really, really sick to his stomach for having been forced to throw the kid under the bus like that.

Now, though, he was back in the Fearamid, and the Master looked more miffed than Stan had ever seen him, and _that_ was saying something.

Especially since he was actually using Stan’s _name_ this time.

 _“STANLEY, YOU’VE BEEN UNDERMINING MY ATTEMPTS TO SPREAD MY PARTY FOR THE LAST TEN DIMENSIONS – ANY REASON WHY?”_ The Master frowned down at Stan from his throne of frozen human agony, the banners of the other Zodiac members frozen behind him. Ford, Dipper, and Mabel were kneeling in front of the Master’s throne, facing Stan.

Some part of him couldn’t help but feel like he was on trial for something.

Stan shrugged. “I don’ like what you’re doin.’”

 _“YEAH, I GET_ THAT _, BUT I THOUGHT THAT I TOLD YOU THAT YOU COULDN’T TELL ANYONE ABOUT WHAT WE’VE GOT GOING ON UNLESS I GIVE THE SAY-SO.”_

“Nah, you didn’t say that.”

Stan smirked as the Master froze at his statement. The eye narrowed. _“WHAT WAS THAT?”_

“You only said that we couldn’t tell people what you _did,_ not the current condition we’re in,” Stan replied. He’d been caught red-handed, and he couldn’t exactly _lie_ to the Master. He was glad that he could warn as many people as he was able to – and it had been in _more_ than ten dimensions, thank you very much– and he knew he was going to end up getting caught at some point.

He looked over at Ford and the five tails that were arranged around his brother. Ford didn’t meet his gaze, instead looking at the floor silently.

Stan hated that look on his brother. Ford was _never_ quiet – never was _supposed_ to be quiet – and this demon had gone ahead and done the _one thing_ that Stan never wanted to see happen to his brother.

 _“WOW. I KNEW THAT YOU WERE GOING TO BE AS HARD TO DEAL WITH AS YOUR BROTHER, BUT I DIDN’T THINK THAT YOUR LITTLE HABIT OF RULE-BENDING CARRIED OVER WITHOUT YOUR WILLPOWER INTACT.”_ The Master did not look the least bit amused. _“SO HOW ABOUT THIS: NONE OF YOU ARE ALLOWED TO SUGGEST ANYTHING ABOUT YOUR CURRENT POSITIONS TO ANYONE UNLESS I GIVE THE SAY-SO. WHICH WILL BE NEVER.”_

The Master _said_ that none of them were allowed to, but he was looking pretty pointedly at Stan. He knew what that meant.

“Yes, Master,” the four Pines said in a dissonant harmony. Stan looked disgusted at being forced to say such a thing, while Ford’s face remained blank.

Dipper looked like he was attempting to mimic Ford’s expression, but it also looked like he’d fallen deeper into a depression that was going to take longer to crawl out of than it had been for him to fall in.

And Mabel….

Stan didn’t look over at her. He could hear her quiet sobs from where he stood.

 _“NOW THAT THAT’S BEEN TAKEN CARE OF!”_ The Master rubbed his hands together. _“I HAVE A FEW THINGS TO LOOK INTO. PATROL THE FEARAMID WHILE I’M GONE – WE CAN’T HAVE ANOTHER BREAKOUT OF FORDS WHILE I’M ABSENT. IT WOULD MAKE ME VERY ANGRY IF THAT DID HAPPEN, SO I TRUST THAT YOU’LL MAKE SURE IT DOESN’T! BE BACK SOON!”_

As soon as the Master vanished from sight in a bright yellow flash, Ford rose to his feet like he was being pulled up on puppet strings. He didn’t even look at Stan; he just started moving towards one of the corridors that led out of the main throne room.

Dipper and Mabel rose to their feet moments later and quickly moved over to Stan.

“We’re never getting out, are we?” Dipper asked, sounding bitter.

“Don’t say that, kid; I bet ya we will.” Stan tried to smile, but he knew that the twins knew he was faking it.

The ache in his chest from the thing that was missing told him more than enough for that.

Mabel sniffled, looking like she was full-on prepared to start bawling right then and there. Stan leaned down and scooped her up in a hug. She buried her face in his shoulder.

“Everything’s gonna be okay, pumpkin.”

The words were empty, without any hope behind them – after all, without the willpower to put behind a thought, was there _really_ any chance hope could come from somewhere in them?

But it was the only thing they had left to hold onto. Mere words.

Stan closed his eyes and sighed as Dipper hugged him around his waist. He knew he’d gotten the word out _enough._

Maybe someone, somewhere, would be able to act on what he’d said.


	20. Rescued

**Chapter 20 -- Rescued**

The Master came back when Ford’s tail was twitching again; he hardly flinched when the Master snapped his fingers and caused the number of tails to go from five to six. He was so used to the pain by now that he didn’t so much as flinch.

 _“ALL RIGHT!”_ The Master rubbed his hands together. _“ANYONE TRY AND COME IN WHILE I WAS GONE?”_

Ford, Dipper, and Mabel shook their heads. Stan paused.

“Saw a ghost,” he offered. “But she got warped outta here as soon as ya got back.”

_“WAS IT MAGIC EYE?”_

“Uh…I’m gonna go with no? Cuz it didn’t look like anyone I knew.” Stan shrugged as the Master continued to look at him. “Brown hair, blue eyes – just some teenage girl who probably got killed up here somewhere.”

The Master eyed him for a moment, then chuckled. _“YEAH, SOUNDS LIKE IT. ANYWAY, WE’VE GOT ANOTHER DIMENSION TO BRING INTO THE PARTY. IT’S GONNA BE A LITTLE DIFFERENT THIS TIME, THOUGH. I GUESS YOU COULD SAY THAT I’M GOING BACK TO MY ROOTS.”_

Ford blinked. Did that mean…?

_“I’M SENDING YOU IN AT THE PERFECT TIME. MAKE SURE TO BLEND IN NOW! – YOU’VE GOT A FULL YEAR BEFORE I’LL BE ABLE TO BREAK THROUGH!”_

The Master snapped his fingers as soon as he finished speaking, causing the Pines’ vision to go white.

When Ford’s vision cleared, he found himself in a now-familiar position: kneeling at the edge of a circle with the others, Cipher’s form burned into the ground in the center. Under Ford was his six-fingered sigil, but with six tails pinwheeled behind it.

Ford sighed quietly. He was about to fall asleep in that position when bushes near them rustled and Stan raised his head.

“We got company.”

Ford rose to his feet after Stan did. He knew the drill by now: subdue the people who saw them arrive, make sure they didn’t interfere before Cipher arrived – like there was anything for them to interfere _in_ – and have Stan eat one of them before—

“No…it _can’t_ be.”

Ford’s ears flicked as he turned to face the figures that had arrived in the forest clearing they were in the middle of.

“What the hell?” Stan muttered, frowning.

Standing on the edge of the clearing were four figures, three of them who looked eerily familiar.

One was – obviously, clearly – a Stanley Pines, still wearing his Mystery Shack suit, even if he didn’t have the fez resting on top of his head. The second was a teenager Mabel Pines, wearing a pink sweater with a strange star on the front, with bat wings and a top hat. The third was a lion with wings and a human face – _Ford’s_ human face. A sphinx.

And the fourth…the fourth figure wasn’t someone Ford recognized.

A teenage human girl, with shoulder-length brown hair with some gray forming at her temples and almost piercing blue eyes, wearing an orange jacket, a red t-shirt, jeans, and dark red boots. And the look on her face was – strangely – _recognition._

The girl shook her head slowly. “No…no way…”

“Cipher’s Horsemen!” the sphinx exclaimed, startled. “I-I knew that a counterpart of myself was among them, but _this?!”_

“Girl’s mine,” Stan muttered.

The girl looked at Stan sharply as he started to move forward, Dipper and Mabel’s eyes starting to glow with energy. Her wide-eyed expression shifted to one of anger. “Oh _Pit_ no. Mind spell ‘em _now!_ ”

“What?” Stan’s counterpart asked in confusion.

“No way would these guys work for Cipher willingly – get in their heads and figure out what’s going on!”

Ford wasn’t sure what to make of the girl’s statement, but when she came lunging for _him_ instead of Stan, he let instinct take over in order to direct her towards Stan. Fire coated his hands as he raised them to block her as she slammed an arm into his hands and—

The girl wasn’t burned.

“Flash Fire!” The girl gritted her teeth as the fire was _absorbed_ into her jacket, startling Ford. Humans had only been _burned_ before – what kind of magic did this girl have that—

The girl pushed forward, taking advantage of the fact that Ford hadn’t moved further, reaching out with her other hand as she started chanting a familiar spell with a loud, clear voice.

_“Vindentis Ominum. Magister Mentium. Magnesium Ad Hominem. Magnum Opus. Habeus Corpus. Inceptus Nolanus Overratus. Magister Mentium Magister MENTIUM MAGISTER MENTIUM!”_

Ford’s eyes widened over the course of the spell as the girl’s hand came into contact with his head. He tried to pull away, but as soon as the spell had begun it was like her hand was stuck to his face. His vision wavered, then became fuzzy and started to fade out as the other three with the girl moved on his family and started chanting as well.

Then his vision faded out completely.

When Ford opened his eyes again, he found himself back in the Fearamid, kneeling on the floor of a darkened throne room. Glowing chains held his hands up above his head, and when he let his head dip forward, he could feel a chain pulling at the collar around his neck as well.

He didn’t need to look back to guess that there were chains extending from the shackles around his ankles as well.

He should have expected that he was chained in the mindscape as well as on the physical plane. It wouldn’t make any sense if he wasn’t.

A roar came from somewhere outside of the Fearamid; Ford’s ears twitched at the sound of it, and he lifted his head slightly.

The roar came again, louder this time.

And then came the yell of a muffled voice.

_“Dragon Pulse, Atmos!”_

The brickwork in front of Ford started to buckle under the force of whatever blast was coming from outside.

_“Again!”_

Another roar, and more buckling – cracks formed, glowing a purple-blue color before fading to a red-orange color.

_“And again!”_

The roar this time was louder than the last – loud enough to cause Ford’s ears to slam down against the top of his head as the wall was blasted in by a large beam of purple-blue energy that just barely missed hitting Ford as it collided with the wall behind him.

“Nice one, Atmos.” The teenage girl from before slid off the head of a green, draconic creature that was too large to fit through the hole it had made in the wall, revealing the red sky of Weirdmageddon on the other side. “Stay put; we might still need ya.”

The dragon huffed in response as the teenage girl turned her attention to Ford and the chains he was trapped in. The confident smirk that was on her face changed to a look of alarm, then faded into a frown as she looked him over.

“Hm.” The girl put her hands on her hips, frowning up at the chains. She rolled up her sleeves and approached Ford with quick, confident strides. “Okay, let’s figure out how to get these things off.”

_“I DON’T THINK SO!”_

The girl stopped short as a chill ran down Ford’s spine at the voice from above him; the Master was _inside_ his mindscape. He felt the chains’ pull grow taut, pulling his head up a little in the process.

The girl looked up, her frown turning into a look of surprise as she took one step back, then another as the Master came down from the shadows above Ford’s head.

 _“FORDSY’S MY PUPPET, CAMPFIRE,”_ the Master said sternly. _“DO YOU REALLY THINK YOU CAN DO ANYTHING FOR HIM?”_

The girl gritted her teeth together as she frowned again, clenching her fists. Fire started to run up and down her arms – _white_ flames. “Well, I certainly can’t do anything while _you’re_ in here, ya moron! Atmos, now!”

The dragon roared in response to her call, a sphere of purple-blue energy forming in its large maw as the flames on the girl’s arms only increased.

The Master burst out laughing. _“WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU CAN KICK ME OUT OF HERE?”_ He tugged on the chains he was holding in one hand, jolting Ford with the force of it. _“I’M THE ONE PULLING THE STRINGS HERE. FORDSY, KICK—“_

 _“White Flare!”_ The girl roared.

The resulting explosion of white flames from the girl and the beam of energy from the dragon hit the Master before he could say more. Instead, he _screamed_ with pain, limbs flailing in every direction as he was blown back into the wall behind him.

Ford watched with somewhat wide eyes as the girl and her dragon pushed the Master back, only for more fire to ripple through the massive white flamethrower and hit the Master with even more force.

“Get. Out. Of. Ford’s. HEAD!” the girl bellowed.

 _“NEVER!”_ the Master roared back. _“YOU CAN’T MAKE ME – YOU’RE NOT—“_

“I can do whatever I scrapping want! And right now I want you _out!_ ”

The girl’s snapped response sent another pulse of energy into the white flamethrower shooting from her hands, pushing the Master even harder against the wall and causing him to scream in pain. He threw up his hands to stop the deluge of fire and energy being thrown at him—

\--and the mindscape suddenly went gray.

Ford felt a weight he had not felt in a long time settle on his chest, making it hard to breathe as he collapsed onto his side. It sounded like his blood was roaring in his ears, but the sound was gradually becoming quieter as his breathing started to become more shallow.

And then someone grabbed his shoulder, and the weight lifted from his chest so quickly that it threw Ford into a coughing fit so loud that he missed the yelp of pained surprise from the girl as she moved back and gave him some room to breathe. He pulled himself up onto his hands and knees, not looking at either one of them as he struggled to rein in his panicking lungs.

_“HEY! YOU—“_

“If you can kick him out, do it,” the girl said with a grim finality.

Ford looked up sharply at the girl’s words, but his mind was already following through: a portal had appeared behind the triangular demon, and it pulled him out, kicking and screaming.

_“STANFORD PIN—“_

The portal closed shut, cutting off the angered yell. A quiet that Ford hadn’t felt in _centuries_ settled then, broken only by Ford finishing to recover his breath.

The girl sighed, her shoulders slumping as though a weight had been yanked off her shoulders. “Okay. Okay.” She turned her attention away from the triangular shape burned into the black brickwork, and looked at Ford. Her brow was furrowed, but…not out of anger.

It almost looked like she was ready to burst into tears.

**Space Break**

Stan, unlike his brother, had been standing in the rotting remains of the Mystery Shack when his counterpart had barreled in with a demonic version of Dipper in tow. Stan hadn’t exactly expected to see a version of his nephew with wings right above his butt and a snazzy suit, but the fact that he’d gone after the Master with an angered screech was definitely a good thing.

Stan’s counterpart ran over to him and winced a bit. “Geez, do I really have this terrible of a suit in other dimensions?”

Stan shrugged. “Hey, it’s not like I _asked_ for this.” He sent a pointed look up at the fight above their heads, the Master trying to find the demonic Dipper off with one hand and holding the chains that kept Stan in place with the other.

Stan’s counterpart followed his gaze and winced. “Yeah, we’re burning that suit first chance we get.” He grabbed Stan’s left wrist and frowned. “No lock to pick. Great.”

“It’s not something I can break, either,” Stan said.

His counterpart’s gaze soured. “Great.” He looked up at the fight that was going on, and the chains that the Master was holding in one hand. “It’s some kinda spell, right? One that he’s making?”

Stan shrugged.

“Right. Okay.” Stan’s counterpart moved, grabbing at the chains that went above Stan’s head. Then he started pulling down.

The Master noticed the pull and looked down. He frowned. _“THAT’S NOT GONNA—“_

Demonic Dipper slammed a punch into the Master’s eye, causing him to let out a screech of pain.

At the same time, he let go of the chains in order to push Dipper back.

Stan and his counterpart watched with wide eyes as the mindscape flickered for a moment as the chains dissolved.

Stan’s counterpart yelped in pain and rubbed at the tips of his fingers. “What the hell was that?”

Stan felt something change on his skin. He winced, then looked down at his wrists. His eyes widened a moment later.

 **“That’s what he gets for getting distracted.”** Dipper’s voice had a reverb of power to it that Stan had only heard in Ciphers before. **“Remember, Stanley, I get the contents of your freezer.”**

“Yeah, yeah, go and have at it.” Stan’s counterpart waved Dipper off, then looked over at Stan with a confident smirk. That smirk dropped a moment later. “What?”

Stan held up a hand, showing his counterpart his wrist. “I probably should’a expected this.”

Dipper’s toothy demonic grin dropped. **“Shit.”**

**Space Break**

Dipper tried to keep the tears in. He really did.

But when Mabel’s counterpart kicked Cipher out of his head without so much as breaking a sweat, the relief was so palpable he couldn’t keep it in.

Mabel’s counterpart held him in a hug, being careful not to bump her head against the branch-like antlers on Dipper’s head as she looked around at the jungle that made up his mindscape. “It’s okay Dipdop. I’ve got you. You’re safe.”

Dipper’s sobs had turned into something far more quiet by then. Mabel’s shoulder was damp from his tears.

If either one of them noticed that the thorns that had encircled Dipper’s neck, wrists, and ankles had turned into little star tattoos, neither one of them made mention of it.

**Space Break**

Mabel was bawling too, but she didn’t cry into the sphinx-Ford’s shoulder as much as she did into his furry chest, holding onto him like he could disappear at any moment if she let go.

The sphinx was careful not to bump into her wings as he put a paw-like hand on her back, holding her close. “Oh, Mabel…what’s he done to you?”

He didn’t look around at the space-like appearance Mabel’s mindscape had taken. His focus was on the places where she had been chained.

Instead of stardust made of what _looked_ like little triangles, she had lion-like paw prints there instead.

“You’re going to be all right,” the sphinx murmured as Mabel continued to weep. “I’ve got you now. You’re safe.”

Mabel sniffled.

**Space Break**

To say that Cipher was angry was an understatement.

He was _incensed._

**_“WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON THAT DIMENSION THEY’RE GOING TO REGRET CROSSING ME!!!_ ”**

The Henchmaniacs scrambled to get out of the way as Cipher raged through the Fearamid, destroying rooms and knocking down pillars and leaving the minions crushed underneath the rubble to clean up the mess behind him.

He hadn’t expected that there would be a loophole in what he’d done to the Pines – that someone could easily break into their minds and take control away from him by force.

A part of him insisted that he’d known and that was why he’d told them not to drop hints about how they’d gotten to be his puppets in the first place, but that did very little to console him.

Mostly because someone had gotten the idea into their heads _regardless_ of what he’d done and taken control of them!

He slammed a fist into a wall, growling as he returned to his throne room and muttering curses under his breath at the group of Pines who had—

Wait. One of them _wasn’t_ a Pines.

Cipher moved into the middle of the room and summoned a window into the dimension he’d chosen as his next target: one of the trees near his chosen entrance point.

There was a group of eight figures lying in the clearing, four with hands – or a paw – on the foreheads of the others. And the one that _clearly_ did not look like the others was that girl who’d gone into Ford’s mind.

 _“HMM….”_ Cipher zoomed in on the girl, looking her over. Campfire was the catalyst. She’d been the first one to think of going into their minds to figure out what was going on – not Fords, not anyone in any of the other dimensions he’d invaded. Just her.

Why was that? What was different about this kid that meant she had been able to do this?

Then it clicked. And his eye turned up in a smile.

The plan could still work. And maybe with some bonuses in the process.

**Space Break**

“Ford, what happened?”

Ford blinked, confused. The girl – rescuer, new master, she hadn’t given him anything to call her yet – was kneeling in front of him now, instead of standing above him. He hadn’t expected that she was willing to get down on his level.

She still had that furrowed-brow-but-not-mad expression on her face, and she was looking him over like she was trying to figure something out.

Her brow furrowed further as her gaze went down from Ford’s face to his chest. “Ford, what have you lost?”

Her voice was unusually quiet, compared to her yelling and Cipher’s voice before.

Ford’s gaze didn’t follow her hand as she reached out and touched a glowing blue scar that slashed across his chest, but he did lower his gaze. “My Will.”

He kept his voice as quiet as hers, if not moreso.

The girl’s expression paled quickly as her eyebrows shot up, eyes widening. Then her eyes slammed shut, her jaw tightened, and a low snarl slipped out. Ford was expecting her to hit him, but she slammed her fist into the floor instead.

“If I see that Cipher again it’ll be too soon,” she snarled. She sighed, expression relaxing, and she looked at Ford with that expression again. She rose to her feet, then held out a hand. “Come on. I’m at least gonna get you out of this cage before waking up.”

Ford stared at the extended hand with a confused expression, then hesitantly took it. As she pulled him up to his feet with surprising strength, he found himself wondering why it was that she was acting this way.

The Mas—

No. Cipher wasn’t his master anymore. The idea sent chills down Ford’s spine and into his tails, but regardless, Cipher hadn’t treated him the way that the girl was.

It was…unexpected.

She led him back to the head of the dragon – which was still stuck through the hole in the Fearamid’s wall. The color of the sky changed as they approached, turning from apocalypse red to blue.

Ford wasn’t sure what the change to his mindscape meant.

“Come on.” The girl motioned for him to climb up on the dragon’s head first, which he did without complaint. She climbed on after him, then sat in the center of a circle of yellow scales and tapped the dragon’s head.

The creature – which Ford was now able to see as something with a Chinese dragon’s shape and with the arms of a T-Rex – pulled out of the hole in the Fearamid and turned, giving Ford and the girl a view of the wasteland that stretched from horizon to horizon below them.

The girl sighed. “I hate that it looks like this.” She shook her head, then looked at Ford as he sat behind her. “How long…?”

Ford shrugged. “Since he took us.”

“Which was…?”

Ford’s six tails shifted behind him. He turned his gaze away from her. “The only indication we were allowed of the passing of time is the number of tails I have.”

The choked sound she made caused his ears to flick in her direction, but he said nothing as the dragon started to descend.

“No one should have to suffer like that, or for that long.” The girl’s voice was strained. She cleared her throat; Ford could hear her jeans scuffing against the scales as she adjusted how she was sitting. “Okay; enough thinking about the past for me. I’m the one who’s got you now, not that stupid demonic mess.”

Ford lifted his head slightly when the girl held a hand out to him.

“My name’s Maria,” she introduced herself. She paused when she saw the blank look that Ford was giving her. “But…if you don’t feel comfortable calling me by my name yet…Guildmaster works just as well. I-I’ve been called that too.”

Ford bowed his head in acknowledgement, then took the offered hand. She shook it, again with a stronger-than-average grip.

The dragon landed, and the Guildmaster and Ford moved off its head before it disappeared in a flash of red light.

“Even in the mindscape, huh?” Guildmaster said with a small smile. She looked over at Ford, the smile fading slightly – but not much. “Everything’s gonna be okay, Ford.” One of her hands moved – as though she was going to pat him on the arm reassuringly – but then she pulled back and shook her head a little. “Come on. Let’s get back to the waking world.”

With that said, the Guildmaster closed her eyes and spread her arms out before falling backwards onto the dirt ground. Before she collided with the earth, her form disappeared in a flash of white.

Ford stared at the spot where she’d been standing, then looked down at his wrists, at the new markings that had taken the place of Cipher’s.

They weren’t manacles anymore. They were _tattoos_ – flames, dancing on his skin, and they almost seemed to move of their own accord when he rotated his wrists.

Ford sighed quietly and closed his eyes, and he felt the ground get thrown out from under his feet as he dropped out of his mindscape and fell back to wakefulness.


End file.
